Catlove9

Date posted: 2y

Harm OCD help

I have had harm OCD for around 4 years now. I’ve had OCD much longer, but the harm OCD came on suddenly 4 years ago during a panic attack and since then, it has been my main theme. I’ve gone through all iterations and have had the urges and the feelings of “wanting to do the horrible thing”, needing to do the horrible thing” or “feeling I have no choice but to do it.” I’ve literally had all of the thoughts, feelings, and urges that comes with harm OCD. Now it’s coming in different. Now it feels like I could act any moment or that I would actually like acting on the thoughts. And my anxiety isn’t as bad as normal. It just doesn’t feel like OCD anymore. I cannot shake these horrible feelings. I’m not sure what to do. When I get wrapped up, I start worrying I belong in jail or in an institution because it feels like I’m a danger. I wish I could explain how real it feels. If anyone has any advice, I would appreciate it.

Harm OCD

Allier792

Date posted: 2y

I have a question. This is the same for me aswell. But this morning I woke up and the intrusive thought came as a statement. It was almost like “yes you are going to do that” and it scared the shit out of me and now I’m terrified even more. Is it like this for anymore else because I’m really scared rn and I’m not in therapy rn because I’m trying to find a therapist and work with insurance.

Catlove9

Date posted: 2y

@Allier792 This happens to me. It will come in like that or will say “oh just go do it already.”

Ocdlife123

Date posted: 2y

@Allier792 Yes, mine always say - whats the point in enjoying life as your going to do such and such anyway Mine also come in commands which is awful

Catlove9

Date posted: 2y

@Ocdlife123 Omg this is me right now. “Don’t go to that party because you’ll kill someone anyway.”

Clem.99

Date posted: 2y

Ocd that feels super real is terrifying. Are you able to start ERP with an experienced ocd therapist?

Catlove9

Date posted: 2y

@Anonymous.12345 I have. I just can’t seem to apply it because these thoughts just seem too real.

Ocdlife123

Date posted: 2y

Im literally going through this exact same thing! Literally just did a post on not thinking im distressed-by my thoughts and not thinking there ego distonic! I also feel like any moment i could do it or want to do it? Harm ocd also, almost feel like impulses? It feels so so real i question why i havent gave my animals up if i feel this real like i could, why am i not avoiding? I must want to? I must be a dangerous person I really feel you on this and here if u wish to talk

Catlove9

Date posted: 2y

@Ocdlife123 Thank you for responding. It really sucks. I feel like I should be locked up because like you said, it feels like at any moment I could act on the thoughts.

Ocdlife123

Date posted: 2y

@Catlove9 Same i feel like i should not have my animals and i should give them up

Catlove9

Date posted: 2y

@Ocdlife123 Ugh. I’ve had the same before with my pets.

Bkenn

Date posted: 2y

i am going though this right now… I’m at work and Im in a panic😭

Catlove9

Date posted: 2y

@Bkenn I’m so sorry. It’s not fun and I wish it would go away.

Bkenn

Date posted: 2y

@Catlove9 yessss!!!! I get harm thought and they send me into a panic and i worry if i’m gonna do it😭

Catlove9

Date posted: 2y

@Bkenn That’s the same as me. Sometimes it feels like I’m on the edge.

Bkenn

Date posted: 2y

@Catlove9 same!!! it’s crazy because I can have days where i am fine and the next it’s back.

Catlove9

Date posted: 2y

@Bkenn Omg same. And then I start wondering “how do I know if I want this?”

Bkenn

Date posted: 2y

@Catlove9 i just try to tell myself that i have gotten through it before and i will get through it again.

Catlove9

Date posted: 2y

@Bkenn I Will try that! Thank you!

Bkenn

Date posted: 2y

@Catlove9 no problem!!! It gets worse around that time of the month and i am dealing with that now and had a full blown panic attack early this morning.

Catlove9

Date posted: 2y

@Bkenn Oh yes. I always get it worse around that time too

Bkenn

Date posted: 2y

@Catlove9 they need to find a cure!!! you can message me anytime!!!

Catlove9

Date posted: 2y

@Bkenn I appreciate it! Same goes for you! We will get through this.

Anonymous

User type: OCD Conqueror

Date posted: 2y

Have you spoken to your therapist about it this exact issue?? Because this is exactly what I deal with. I don’t have any triggers cus it’s all in my head. Just made a post about it :(

Catlove9

Date posted: 2y

@Anonymous Really? You deal with the same?

Anonymous

User type: OCD Conqueror

Date posted: 2y

@Catlove9 Yeah they feel like commands

Catlove9

Date posted: 2y

@Anonymous Yes! Omg. Absolutely. And for me it feels like I have no choice.

Anonymous

User type: OCD Conqueror

Date posted: 2y

@Catlove9 How long have you been suffering with these and how long have you been doing erp? I informed my therapist about it. Do you practice from NOCD?

Catlove9

Date posted: 2y

@Anonymous I would say it’s been off and on for 4 years. I do practice with NOCD. I feel like I must be doing something wrong.

Anonymous

User type: OCD Conqueror

Date posted: 2y

@Catlove9 How long have you been doing NOCD? I only did 5 sessions?

Anonymous

User type: OCD Conqueror

Date posted: 2y

@Catlove9 Maybe you just started ERP… keep it up :)

Catlove9

Date posted: 2y

@Anonymous Sorry! I’ve been doing it a long while. Prob 2 years. I just think I need to try harder 😔

Anonymous

User type: OCD Conqueror

Date posted: 2y

@Catlove9 Aww talk to ur NOCD therapist ;( u got this

Catlove9

Date posted: 2y

@Anonymous Thank you! I think I’m giving in to rumination too much.

lu22

Date posted: 24w

I really need advice harm ocd

I know we’re not meant to ask for reassurance but I’m currently not in therapy and I need help, it feels scarily real and I feel like I’m not anxious or worried over the thoughts. I had stabbing thoughts about someone I care about and I started deliberately imagining them to test myself to see if I hate it or not but instead it felt like I knew how it feels to stab someone and like the feeling of doing that physical action and I swear it is the worst thing I have ever experienced as well I had moments where it felt like It was about to happen or I keep getting this really sick ‘happy’ feeling that I want to do that and I don’t know what that is but it feels incredibly real almost like I was getting a happy feeling or wanted to do that thing and jsut wasn’t giving into it and now I’m thinking I’m actually evil and it feels like I get a pleasurable feeling over the thought of doing that and would want to do it?? Because I ‘like’ the feeling of doing it or it would ‘feel’ good I swear I really don’t know what to do it feels incredibly real I feel like I can’t even say that I’m worried or scared because I feel like I’m lying and actually want it and have evil desires I’m really concerned, I have never done anything bad in my life, I feel like what if through experimenting and imagining the thoughts to test myself I have suddenly discovered I like it because it feels extremely real that I would ‘enjoy’ or like Doing that evil thing and it’s really concerning, i don’t understand I was fine a few days ago and suddenly I’m experiencing this? Is it possible to suddenly become evil i don’t want to be evil, but what if i like it and my desire to not be evil isn’t as strong as this ‘happy feeling’ i wish I can be normal I don’t want any of this please but I swear I feel like there is something wrong with me, I think this is the worst I’ve ever felt, like it feels like I want it and would enjoy it and it’s making me feel really worried but at the same time I don’t even know if I’m worried please help I need advice

Hexxi

Date posted: 22w

Harm ocd urges?

Harm ocd urges Does anyone else have such strong harm ocd urges regarding your obsession that it literally feels like you’re holding back from doing it? I understand that harm ocd does indeed include urges, but can they rlly feel THAT real? Like at any time I could just “decide” to do it?

Catlove9

Date posted: 22w

What do you say to OCD when you have harm urges?

I am struggling right now with intrusive harm urges. They feel real and it feels like I am going to act any second. It feels like I have to hold myself back, which is a scary thoughts. I am trying so hard not to compulse, but does anyone have tips on what they do in these situations?

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