Sorry to keep posting

Can ocd make you think your suicidal? I then try justify why i dont want to kill myself Eg my daughter would be so unhappy with out me! Then my ocd was like “its okay take her with u” Omg so freaked out Now my thoughts keep telling me im planning on doing this or giving me ideas on how to do it to both of us! Please advice im so scared im actually planning this now as the images and ideas are so vivid. Will it convince me? Im afraid i will get suicidal off this pain and actually then do it as already depressed. Do i need more then ocd help

Username: SavvySavDoerkSavvySavDoerk

Date posted: 1y ago

Yes this is one of the things I struggle with the most! I even had a dream where I told my friends I wanted to die. It's really scary but I just get through each day knowing I'm truly in control. Also being honest with my husband is good because he reminds me he'll protect me from myself. It's definitely a compulsion to ask him if he'll protect me from myself but, like most compulsions, it helps me for a while.

Username: Ocdlife123Ocdlife123

Date posted: 1y ago

@SavvySavDoerk Its scarey as i dont always feel in control or feel like i trust myself

Username: SavvySavDoerkSavvySavDoerk

Date posted: 1y ago

@Ocdlife123 Yeah same it takes a lot of time to trust yourself again. I get sort of mad at my brain like "brain why are you tormenting me? how can I trust myself when I make myself suffer" but then I remember ocd is just a huge alarm dysfunction in the brain and my brain is actually trying to keep me safe from my fears... even if it doesn't feel like it. Just keep on challenging fears and taking care of yourself!

Username: Ocdlife123Ocdlife123

Date posted: 1y ago

@SavvySavDoerk Thankyou x

Username: vgbvgb

User type: OCD Conqueror

Date posted: 1y ago

I’m so sorry you are going through a tough time. It really sucks. Ocd is always looking to outsmart us and keep us prisoners. It’s ocd. It’s not you. If you have a medical condition like hypertension it doesn’t make you hypertension. You have to treat it as a symptom of a disease. U can’t run away because it is part of your road map. But u can see it for what it is…. A torture chamber that is NOT REAL. Look at it for what it is. A whining kid trying to get all the attention with their BAD behavior. Then change the channel so to speak. Do something that is fun. Cherish a happy memory. Accept yourself as you are ocd and all. Be kind tO YOU. REMEMBER you are not alone. So many of us struggle just like you. We are good loving people with a condition. But our core is beautiful and we should show ourselves live and compassion. I’m 64 so I can safely say I’ve had this all my life but this site and awareness had truly helped me to live beyond the fear. Yes it’s there. Even as I am typing I hear the echoes calling to me trying to grab hold onto the fear of what if…. But FUCK IT! I’m still gonna get up and love this day cuz it’s all any of us have! I’m with you. Feel better!🌺🌺🌺🌺🌺☀️☀️☀️☀️

Username: Anonymous 567Anonymous 567

Date posted: 1y ago

I struggle with this too. It’s awful. Then you see triggering stuff in the news about people killing themselves or themselves and their children and it sends you into a complete spiral of researching and looking for answers as to why you’re not like that person or how you’re not gonna snap and etc etc. and some days I barely have these thoughts at all. and im happy. Then there’s days like today where they are louder for whatever reason and trying to reason with them in your head never works. Like earlier I was looking at a photo on my phone of my 10 month old and the thought popped into my head "what if hes possessed or evil" LOL like its so assanine and ridiculous that u can literally almost laugh at it. but then the OCd gives you that sinking pit in ur stomach feeling with the rush of anxiety and youre lile.. why is this scaring me.. i must really think its true. and then i deleted the pic of my son that i was looking at when i had the thought. its a vicious cycle. then of course youre like well what if its not ocd and im crazy. its awful not being able to trust urself. and i think this theme is one of the hardest to talk abput bc thoughts of harming yourself or ur kids is a red flag to most ppl and ppl that dont understand ocd and u feel so ashamed. and their response scares u even more. bc if they think youre capable of it, it makes it feel more real.

Username: holytropical!

Date posted: 5y ago

(PLEASE HELP IM BEGGING!) Hey guys, right now I’m having suicidal OCD and it’s really fucking scaring me because I know I want to live but it’s feeling like I’m going to end my life any second or any day now and that I’m going to die soon, and I’m afraid that I’m going to come up with a plan and go through with it, or say fuck it, I don’t care about recovery, be selfish and just do it. I’m SO scared I don’t know what to do anymore, I don’t know if these are real suicidal thoughts or just my OCD attacking me and I’m genuinely scared for my life. It’s like every second of the day I get a stupid intrusive suicidal thought and it makes me feel like I’m really suicidal and that I don’t want to live anymore, for ANYTHING positive I hear, I twist it and make it negative and tell myself, you’re going to die soon, or you’re gonna kill yourself anyway, you don’t have a future, you don’t care anymore. I even feel a lil bit down and sad when I get these thoughts and I start to feel depersonalization, I almost feel depressed when I get these thoughts all day and it makes me feel like I’m genuinely gonna get depressed and the suicidal thoughts will become REAL I’m so scared. Even when my parents tell me that I’m going to be ok and not do anything, I tell myself in my mind that I’m still going to go through with suicide and just kill myself. I don’t have a set plan and I’m afraid that I may develop a plan and want to go through with it. IM SCARED FOR MY LIFE! IM SO FUCKING SCARED PLEASE HELP PLEASE! Anyone that has gone through this PLEASE HELP! Going into a hospital won’t help because I’m not ACTUALLY suicidal but these thoughts make me FEEL like I am and it’s just SO confusing I don’t know what’s real and what’s not!!! PLEASE HELP ANYONE!!!! I’m so fucking scared ??

Harm OCD

Username: PRIV8

Date posted: 2y ago

Okay i will be honest cause i had enough of this

My question is can Ocd gives you feelings of the horrible inteusive thought that you have are things you want like the harm thought you have, you have a feeling of "i want to do this cause i feel like it, i will enjoy it" Yesterday i got really angry cause i did something bad,then i wanted to focus on something else but a deep feeling of "no i want to feel this pain" came that really made me scared, and i had to let myself feel that everything is bad, im alone, nobody will help, i wanted to shift my attention but the feeling of no this is an authentic feeling just pushed me back,then all of this created a thought and a feeling of i should die, nothing will be better... since then im terrified that im actually suicidal or not, cause when i want to feel better,i get this feeling of i dont want to feel good,.i want to feel bad cause everything is bad, and i feel terribble and hopeless about this. Can this be ocd? Another one,the harm thoughts, whenever i have one i have a feeling to and thoughts that says i would enjoy that. Im really asking this cause i had enough...

Username: Aislinndest

Date posted: 1y ago

Does this sound like ocd?

I can’t figure out if I’m really suicidal or just obsessing over the thought of it. Im to scared to even do it. I don't know if this is my OCD or what but for the past week or so it's been really bothering me these thoughts that I am on edge, scared. I haven't eaten in 3 days. I have imagined every single way of doing it, and everything and it makes me SICK. It feels like an urge at this point. I start to feel like maybe I could actually do it, then I feel myself about to go into a panic attack. I already feel derealization where this world doesn't feel real and nobody seems real to me, and my family feels like strangers and I'm just really scared. I feel very scared. I don't physically feel like I'm "here." I feel like my mind is lost. I feel like I just want to be at peace and then I think I’m seriously suicidal and the cycle just keeps repeating itself. Im sick to my stomach and terrified.

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