TW - incorrect world view

In my head I have created a world view that seems pleasant to me. A world view where everyone has a very special place, irreplaceable, and world shattering if a relationship that should be wasn't. That world view doesn't exist in reality. Social relationships are pretty malleable. If I didn't meet my friends, they'd be just as happy, and so would I. Etc. And I wish I never thought up that view of reality and the "how things should be" that comes with it. I should be alright with the fact that myself and others are okay without each other. And I'm just upset with how I've developed my thinking...

"Pure" OCD

Anonymous

Date posted: 2y

Do you have maladaptive daydreaming diagnosed? I didn't know that was diagnoseable, I thought it was more a concept than a diagnosis. I think I have that too though

bunniesnchee...

Date posted: 2y

Oh I think you're right!! I didn't get it actually diagnosed, my therapist just talked to me about doing it, that's what I meant, my bad!!

Anonymous

Date posted: 2y

@bunniesncheesecake That's okay! I just wasn't sure

Anonymous

Date posted: 2y

I don't feel like it's very creative, personally. It's sort of like the whole thing where people say that a couple were "meant for each other", or believing in a "true love", but on a grander scale (and obviously not about romantic relationships...) And I'm sure whatever it is isn't healthy. Is it a dissociative coping mechanism? If I have a decent understanding of what is meant by that, then my answer is maybe it is. And good for you to seek help!

bunniesnchee...

Date posted: 2y

Thank you!! And gotcha, that's really interesting! I am not at ALL a psychologist or anything, but from what you have said, it does sound like a coping mechanism. Are you able to talk to a therapist about it?

Anonymous

Date posted: 2y

@bunniesncheesecake I am seeing a NOCD therapist, but I don't talk to him much about this stuff. It's distressing to me, sure, but there's a few things that are distressing to me, and this isn't the most distressing thing. Besides, I just honestly don't really know how he'd help me with this different than just doing the ERP I have been doing

bunniesnchee...

Date posted: 2y

@Anonymous - I'm so sorry you've felt distressed talking about some things. And that sounds frustrating wondering what to do when you have already done so much. The therapist I'm currently seeing, in person and not through NOCD, has looked outside of OCD treatment, including ERP, for my maladaptive daydreaming. For example, in the daydream, there are lots of expectations I hold to my parents for emotional fulfillment. My counselor is helping me to understand my emotional needs without erp or anything related to ocd. Every person is different though, of course!! I have just been learning that personally, not all of my problems should be dealt with the erp route. Do you think the things you are dealing with right now could be approached in a non-ocd way?

Anonymous

Date posted: 2y

@bunniesncheesecake Some aspects, maybe. It's hard to tell what should be treated with ERP and what should be treated in a different way, and it's hard to tell what things are OCD and what things aren't, you know? But I get the feeling my therapist, for this thing, would recommend ERP. Either way, I have a lot of other things to worry about Life is confusing, not knowing what to do to get better

bunniesnchee...

Date posted: 2y

The fact that you have made such an elaborate and vivid world is definitely a testament to how powerful your mind is, and how smart and creative you are. That must take a lot of brainpower!! Do you feel like the world you've created is more of a dissociative coping mechanism than a healthy one? Not at all to say that it's unhealthy, I was just wondering how you view it! I have been maladaptive daydreaming since I was little, and only recently I wanted to talk about it and get it diagnosed.

Anonymous

Date posted: 25w

Existential relationship concerns

TW: multiple good options for relationships I'm having stress about the concept and intricacies of relationships. Really, relationships of any kind. But, for example, partner relationships (I'm single btw); how do you know who's right? Aren't there multiple people who could be equally a good option? I can also miss my chance, yeah? I just don't like the intricacies and existential questioning about all my relationships, even my relationships with my friends and family... it's really stressing me out

squirrelobse...

Date posted: 24w

This isn't OCD related at all, not even a little, and I'm really sorry, but I feel so panicked and overwhelmed right now and I need an outlet. So basically, I have this friend and we met online shortly after Christmas, not irl. We got on really well. I felt like I could tell them anything. Whenever I felt sad (which was quite often) they would help so much by just being there for me. Sending cute and reassuring tiktoks to me. I felt like they were the nicest ever. I told them stuff other people might judge me for. They never judged me and they never seemed judgemental. I started noticing some things, like their reposts on Tiktok. I noticed years ago they reposted something very anti LGBTQ+. It hurt, I couldn't understand it. I asked them about it, and they didn't exactly seem like they did hate LGBTQ+ people. I moved on, still unsure. I found recently they reposted something else. I wasn't sure whether this was super offensive, but the tone of the original post FELT offensive. I have a strong moral compass, and these things got to me so much because I'm attached to this person. And then today, I find another thing they reposted, this time about immigration. It had a strong racist tone. I know now that I need to cut them off. I don't want people like that in my life. It's one thing having different views, but I firmly stand by the idea that you should agree with those around you about things like this. But I'm so distressed. I feel so attached to them. None of this seems like them at all. They seem like such a kind, non judgemental person. I would sit waiting for their text. I would feel so happy to hear from them. We text non stop. We have loads in common. They never judged me. I thought I finally found someone who actually wanted to be my friend, who actually liked me. I'm going to feel empty and numb, and I'm trying not to cry while writing this. Who will I have? Nobody to expect a text from. Nobody to ask about my day. Nobody to send me cute pictures to cheer me up. I actually feel like I'll never get past this. I feel so lonely all the time and they were there for me when no one else was. I feel so numb and I'm terrified. Sorry again that this isn't OCD related. I just didn't know what to do.

flyana

Date posted: 22w

oh my god, I'm struggling today

tw . . . . . . I don't want to trigger anyone, so please be warned before reading. I'm feeling pretty hopeless. I don't know if I deserve... anything. I've had two therapists now tell me I'm normal and I don't need to worry so much, but I find it hard to believe them. Just when I think I'm doing okay, thoughts flood back in. I feel like the world is better off without me in it and that others would agree if they weren't a paid therapist there to give me reassurance. I'm tempted to break up with my boyfriend because he doesn't deserve this. I want to pretend I'm okay for the sake of my parents. But if they passed away, I'm not sure I'd have much strength to live for myself. This feeling is pretty bad right now. Overwhelming. I have absolutely no love for myself. I can't even distract myself by watching TV or shows I love, because all I can think is, "Look at those people. They deserve to live and be happy, and I'm not one of them." Gah, this is bad. I'm an adult, and I feel like such a baby for feeling this way. How dramatic am I? How can other people have similar (if not worse) thoughts than me, and then still be ok with themselves? I miss the person I used to be. I miss feeling okay. I feel ok momentarily, but then it all comes crashing down. I can't stand it. All I want is for things to go back to how they used to be.

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TW - incorrect world view

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