Givenup
- Date posted
- 2y
Hocd
My intrusive thoughts are telling me that im repressing my attraction when i dont ever want to ever be attracted to men in any way…
AdamHAdamH
- Date posted
- 2y
Classic HOCD - I've had this thought and many more similar to it numerous times "you're repressing your sexuality", "you're repressing your true feelings", "you're repressing your true self" etc. Etc.
PancakeBuenoPancakeBueno
- Date posted
- 2y
Let your thoughts come and just pass, don't let them affect you!
GivenupGivenup
- Date posted
- 2y
@PancakeBueno I also have pocd and real events ocd… i just posted about it…
PancakeBuenoPancakeBueno
- Date posted
- 2y
@Givenup Continue with your therapy and you will see that it will get better!<3
GivenupGivenup
- Date posted
- 2y
@PancakeBueno Its like my intrusive thoughts… “adapt”… anything that sounds homosexual my hocd will give me thoughts about… like i could speak in korean and i would get an intrusive hocd thought in korean, or i could be looking at a woman and i would get a sudden intrusive hocd sexual thought thats detailed… like i seriously dont understand why this is happening to me… and the intrusive feelings, and the slightly faster heartbeat when i see a shirtless guy compared to a normal woman that im attracted to (plus giving me automatic intrusive thoughts about men whenever beautiful girls are mentioned) makes this life a living hell… I was checking my heartrate between seeing a guy people consider “attractive” and a girl i found attractive. I had a slightly faster heart-rate when i was looking at a guy… i don’t ever want to ever be homosexual or bisexual at all… I dont ever want to ever be homosexual or bisexual in any way in any way shape or form… i dont ever want to ever be homosexual or bisexual at all…
PancakeBuenoPancakeBueno
- Date posted
- 2y
@Givenup Please,stop seeking for reassurance.i know it's hard,after 4 years of Hocd I'm still doing it sometimes,but it makes your OCD stronger. You're not your thoughts.If you show that you are not afraid of them, they will leave, don't even react when they pop up in your head.
GivenupGivenup
- Date posted
- 2y
@PancakeBueno But i have real events ocd with my hocd too…
PancakeBuenoPancakeBueno
- Date posted
- 2y
@Givenup It's difficult I know,I have it too.
WortoWorto
- Date posted
- 2y
@Givenup Heart rare will go up due to stress and anxiety more than it will from 'liking' someone so there's no reason you should use that as proof one way or another. You're just as likely to feel stressed by not finding someone attractive as you are worrying that you're finding someone attractive. If it helps you, I've recently just started suffering with this theme again after a long time without - but when you say about your mind adapting anything or everything, you're not wrong. Many years ago, I remember reading a Horoscope where it said something like 'you're going to find something out about yourself soon' and I caused a massive anxiety spike in me. Then I realised I had actually read the wrong starsign, lol. I don't even particularly believe in horoscopes, yet that was enough to panic me. Would be the same with random stuff like car licence plates. If I saw a registration like F123 AGG it would make me worry about why I noticed it immediately - as if it that had any bearing on anything.
Related posts
ocdsurviver
- Date posted
- 20w
How do y’all deal with this?
I’ve recovered from HOCD before and got my attraction and my usual actual identity back. I was recovered from end 2022- start 2025 until I got triggered UGHHH😭 My HOCD is REALLY trying to convince me and it’s SO annoying cause I genuinely don’t want these thoughts. I know I naturally like men and always have done so. I can’t wait for my first therapy session in two days Omg! I need your advice, not necessarily reassurance, but more advice? My HOCD is throwing random “proof” I did/ saw as a child in my face, which back then had no meaning in my life and I continued to live a perfectly heterosexual life. I’ve educated myself about arousal non concordance / child’s play, but it still doesn’t remove the HOCD. I’ve read therapists great explanations on how it’s not a sexuality issue, BUT ITS AN OCD BRAIN ISSUE. So basically I’ve been straight and i will die as straight. But my ocd is still continuing with the intrusive thoughts/flashbacks. I’ve had some moments where I haven’t done as many compulsions and had less anxiety but still had those damn thoughts and I DO NOT want those damn thoughts. I have so much proof and factual/logical explanations but HOCD is still continuing to thrive. I absolutely hate this and I feel so alone. I wish there was a reset button cause I don’t want these thoughts to happen. I want a man and I stand by that. How do y’all deal with these situations? Cause sitting with the thoughts is clearly not helping.
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user74128588493
- Date posted
- 19w
hocd
i’m scared i’m bi and in denial and trying to convince myself im straight.
youllwintheb...
- Date posted
- 18w
Hocd (recovery or ocd in controll?)
I haven't had anxiety for 1 week, I haven't had so many thoughts, but when it comes to sexuality I feel discomfort and I feel like something is pressing on my chest, it's very disturbing, and I still have attraction (false I hope), I wasn't diagnosed with hocd but I had all the symptoms, (now I don't have anxiety anymore, except when a feeling that I'm gay appears), I no longer felt that strong need to watch videos on yt or look for things that would make me feel comfortable, so somehow I managed to keep this under control, but I don't know if it's recovery or if I'm just lying to myself that I'm not gay. If anyone has any ideas, I hope they write something here
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