I was doing a compulsion and finally I think I did it right than ocd tried to force me to do it again if I won't do it again I will get as I was before years I ago which I fight a lot to never be in that state now I am afarid that If I don't do what ocd is telling me I will be bad again but I am afraid I will destroy the compulsion I am stuck idk what to do to please help I am so scared
That is soooooo typical OCD. You are suffering from the What-Ifs: what if I don't do what OCD is telling me to do, will it make things worse? The last thing you want to do is give in to the compulsion, because it only feeds the pig-OCD. Stand up to OCD and say "bring it on, sucker, because you'll always lose," then be prepared to sit in discomfort until the episode passes--and it WILL pass--but not if you give into the compulsion. I don't know what the theme is, but when we accept uncertainty and stay in the present we just took away OCD's power over us. Yes, the disorder will try to get you back in its grasp, but if you hold out you'll win. Do you have a trained OCD therapist who uses ERP?
No I haven't did ERP before bc in my country doesn't know much about ocd but thanks a lot for the support
@Steven55! Can OCD even sometimes disguise itself as voices that make you highly anxious or scared
@anthonycaronna - Do you mean an actual voice or a thought?
@anthonycaronna - Anthony, I did some research and the answer is yes, OCD can cause auditory hallucination (voices).
Anthony, I have not experienced voices, just thoughts, etc. This doesn't mean OCD can't do it, it just means it hasn't happened to me. I can see how that would be very frightening and I'm sorry you're going though. My gut tells me it's OCD, because this disorder will do anything to keep you in its grasp. The same mind that split the atom and sent spacecraft throughout the galaxy can certainly invent ways to keep us in a severe state of anxiety. Perhaps some of our friends on this site can jump in and give you a better idea. Do you have a trained OCD therapist, one who uses ERP? That would be a huge help for you.
@Steven55! Thank you! I hear God’s voice sometimes and I know when it’s him. Sometimes there are other voices that I hear that give me fear and confusion which is OCD
@Steven55! I’ve Never tried ERP
@Steven55! It’s not like actually hearing it’s like you hear with your mind
@anthonycaronna - Why not get a free consultation by contacting NOCD. It could really help.
@Steven55! What do you do during this consultation?
@anthonycaronna - It's not a big deal. You explain in broad strokes what you're going through. You don't have to get into the weeds. They explain how NOCD works, how they match you with a therapist based on the kind of person you would like to work with. They explain what they charge and the various insurance companies they work with, and you go from there. Once that's out of the way, you'll get an appointment set up with a therapist and they'll do the testing to determine if you're OCD. Then you begin your sessions.
i don’t want to do my compulsions. I feel like if I don’t somebody will get hurt, sick or die. It’s a very scary thought to feel like if I don’t do my compulsions it will be my fault even though it isn’t & nor will it happen. I know it’s magical thinking & my thoughts are not true nor will they come true. it’s just im so tired of doing these compulsions. im so tired of feeling like I can stop something bad happening if I don’t step on this or touch this 4 times. it even got me believing that if I do something I want to do & love, something bad will happen. I just want to be able to live & feel like I use to. I hate ocd. how can I calm this down so I can be able to navigate in my own life?
It is not the thoughts or urges that scare me anymore. It is the way I feel like I’ve absorbed the compulsions into my identity :( I am doing them so automatically that it feels like I am choosing them freely and they’re me. and because of that, it feels like I AM the OCD now, not just someone with OCD. I think I’m just deeply trapped in a loop. I was trying to survive unbearable fear so I started scanning. Then I started pre-scanning. Then checking if I pre-scanned. Then I check how I feel during all that. I run to beat my OCD to the “punchline” (intrusive thought, urge, sensation) because I’m so scared all the time. So scared that I don’t even feel it anymore. I feel numb and all that’s left is this jittery residue and numbness. Now it’s all tangled together in a huge knot. I feel so extremely lost. I think this may just be meta OCD, but I’ve never ever felt so gone before :( I’m really scared.
Resisting compulsions feels so wrong and dangerous, I’m trying my best but the anxiety of doing so is immense. Especially because my brain is still not allowing myself to believe that my obsession is OCD, it wants me to believe it is a threat, so even calling my compulsions “compulsions” is making me anxious because that is me calling this whole thing OCD and not real if that makes sense?
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