- Date posted
- 5y ago
- Date posted
- 5y ago
I personally think your doing yourself a disservice to yourself to label yourself as bi. Your not fully exposing yourself to your fear. I get it though, you really want to be free. But the only way to do that is through ERP therapy.
- Date posted
- 5y ago
I called myself gay for a while really believing I was gay. Turns out I’m not gay and it was the HOCD. However, telling people I was gay and receiving a reaction of warmth and acceptance made me feel less gay. Took away some of the shame. OCD uses shame as a weapon.
- Date posted
- 5y ago
I wrote a coming out letter to friends and family. It wasn’t deliberate therapy either. I was so in my OCD that I believed it. Afterwards, I was like, “I don’t feel gay anymore.” So confusing at first but now it makes more sense to me.
- Date posted
- 5y ago
I did the exact same thing a couple months ago!
- Date posted
- 5y ago
I would strongly advice you to get diagnosed. A proper formal treatment and therapy would be really helpful, you would not regret. Using this app, searching answers online, and pondering by yourself is temporary relief, reassurances and compulsions and you would be stuck in this loop forever. Do you want to be asking questions in this app for years and years? The sooner you begin on treatment, the faster you will see how easy it becomes to cope with it. Trust me, people have wasted their entire lives with OCD by not deciding to get diagnosed.
- Date posted
- 5y ago
Get in touch with a psychiatrist first and tell All your symptoms, like ALL of them. Psychiatrist will be the best to know what therapist is best for you and is also best for deciding for you if you need any meds or what meds will be best for you. Meds might sound not pleasant, but meds are really, like really helpful with OCD. At the end of the day, it is not you but your hyperactive frontal cortex that is putting you through this struggle. And meds chemically will calm your brain. Look up the difference between people with OCD brain and normal brain.
- Date posted
- 5y ago
Okay thank you!
- Date posted
- 5y ago
This is all just so confusing to me. I keep feeling like I’m lesbian but there’s no evidence of that. I’ve never wanted a relationship with a girl or anything. Yeah I think they could be really pretty and sometimes even hot. But I still never thought “Oo I wanna have sex with her, I wanna hug her and kiss her” and I’m I haven’t Ik that. Ik I can’t be lesbian. I’ve crushed on boys my whole life, wanted a boyfriend, wanted to have sex with them. All of that. But I hate that I keep questioning this.
- Date posted
- 5y ago
I’m just so frustrated with this , I also can’t stop googling questions. When Ik it just fuels my anxiety even more. But then I think what if I’m in denial and I’m trying to not find evidence that I’m lesbian.
- Date posted
- 5y ago
Do you have a therapist?
- Date posted
- 5y ago
No. I have thought about getting one. But im afraid they’d tell me it’s not ocd.
- Date posted
- 5y ago
Have you been formally diagnosed?
- Date posted
- 5y ago
No but I have experienced thoughts like this in the past.
- Date posted
- 5y ago
What are you getting at? Do you think it isn’t ocd??
- Date posted
- 5y ago
Okay thank you, uhm what would you advice what kind of therapist I get?
Related posts
- Date posted
- 19w ago
That’s kinda my question. All my thoughts feel so realistic and so now I doubt if they are ocd and if I just can’t make my mind up about something and I’m using ocd as an excuse or something idc I feel like this post is word vomit.
- User type
- OCD Conqueror
- Date posted
- 14w ago
I’ve had so many moments of clarity with my OCD that I love my boyfriend and I’m beyond willing to go through this to be better and be with him. in the back of mind I’ve in a way known I was at least somewhat sexually attracted to women (I’m a woman) since the start of the ocd it was always like “okay. Fine, but I don’t want to date a girl” I only just realized this after the ocd started, I never really argued with this. my ocd has always revolved around if I’m romantically interested in women and not men. I’ve done so many compulsions through this year and a half and 9 times out of 10 have come to the conclusion that I don’t want to be with a woman romantically. I always end up feeling like I know I love my boyfriend. But the doubts don’t stop about whether I want to spend my life with a woman instead, my heart literally breaks to think of not being with my bf and imagining him with someone else. I don’t want to be with a woman I know deep down somewhere underneath the anxiety that that’s not what I want. It doesn’t feel natural for me, unfulfilling. I want to tell my boyfriend about the possible sexual attraction to women (ik it’s still ocd related) but I’m scared that once I tell him, I’ll realize that I actually do want to be with women and not with him. Ugh I’ve spent hours today ruminating about this after being solid in my commitment with him for a little while, I’m stuck in this loop and idk how to get out right now
- Date posted
- 13w ago
Idk what else to title this. I was watching a film cooper video cuz why not and he mentioned smthn about wall paper customization and icons and stuff and I just kinda had a groinal response followed by the memory of me having my first crush on a woman (my friend at the time) that helped me figure out that I’m bi and I felt kinda intensely for her but that’s cuz a) it was new and b) we were kinda on again off again friends who haven’t spoken in a few years now and I’m over her entirely. It was toxic I think. She was too much like the person who bullied me in elementary school (they were friends as well so my mom made me cut her off which is. Fair. Made me really sad but eh that’s life) I saw her at prom cuz someone brought her. It was nice to see her but yeah that was it. And now I’m mentally comparing what I felt for women in the past (idk intense crush, listening to a lot of gay songs (think she by dodie) dressing semi masc cuz funky, we had nicknames for each other despite not dating or anything) to men (less intense crush but still big crush, I’ve only dated and kissed men so sparks rhere) and now I’m just slightly nauseous and worried that I don’t like men as much as I like women but I think that’s normal for any bi person? To have different levels of attraction to different genders? Idk I feel gross and icky now like I shouldn’t even be thinking about it or her cuz I have a bf. And I do look fondly upon it, now I’m nervous cuz I got more excited about her calling me a specific nickname than I do from my bf calling me honey even at the beginning? Honey felt more traditional and I love it but we do switch around nicknames and it’s always nice, not many butterflies anymore, and sometimes I get anxious when he does lately, if it’s a nickname in Portuguese. Or if he called me a shortened version of my name. What does that mean? I’m nervous now. I was doing half decently today now I’m nauseous again. I’m worried that cuz I liked the nicknames she and I had that means I don’t like the ones my bf and I have and that I just don’t like him or men cuz I’ve been feeling off around him. But I love when he calls me honey, it still feels good when he does it now but no butterflies. Idk what’s wrong with me. Is it even ocd at this point. Even if I do like women slightly more it doesn’t erase that I love my bf. I’m worried I’m leaning too much towards women tho and I’m a lesbian. Idk if my bi cycle is cycling or if I’m just a lesbian entirely cuz I don’t feel much when my bf takes off his shirt, sex feels different, and things feel stale and slow. But maybe that’s cuz I’m checking and comparing. Now I’m anxious fuck. I’m trying not to think about her idk why. I’m worried I still find her attractive or am attracted to her or smthn. She’s in my city. I didn’t care before but now I do. Or if I think about her I’ll think about other women and will only want to have sec with women which not really tbh. I wanna be able to enjoy sec with my bf. It just hasn’t felt right lately cuz I’ve been so depressed and obsessive. I wasn’t obsessing much last night when we had sex but it still didn’t feel passionate. It didn’t feel uncomfortable but I thought it’d be more? Idk. I know it’s normal to not feel him inside me cuz the vagina isn’t very nerved up compared to the clitoris but it felt like more the motions. But tbh. I needed it. Idk I wanted to have sex and it was a nice stress relief. I just didn’t feel butterflies which kinda bummed me out but we’ve been having sex since august so that’s normal. Idk. I haven’t been able to fantasize about sex. The fact that I’m bi makes all of this so confusing. Cuz yes hypothetically I can enjoy the thought of sex with a woman. But I don’t want to rn cuz I’m dating a man. And I can’t fantasize about sex with him cuz I’m getting intrusive thoughts about my friends and I having sex. I have this urge to watch porn cuz it’s been a while but I’m not going to. I’ve cut down a lot on masturbation. Partially cuz this partially cuz I wanna do things with my bf (when I’m mentally ok) but jow my brain is saying “Oo you think all these women are so hot you’re gonna go feral blah blah blah” and yes women are hot but I don’t wanna have sex with a woman. Idk saying women are hot doesn’t bring me anxiety but the thought of sex with one or leaving my bf and saying I’m a lesbian bother me. Cuz I know it’s not true. I love him I know that. I’d be happy if we stayed together. I wouldn’t regret a thing honestly. I like having sex with him. Idc if it’s not like porn or the movies. As long as I’m being pleasured and he’s being pleasured we’re good. That’s what sex is about. I think the loss of butterflies is normal cuz the excitement of like (sorry tmi) fingering and oral eventually wears off right? But still feels good. I don’t feel as excited about intimacy anymore cuz we have done it so often but it still feels nice. But my brain perceives that as me not liking sex with men and therefore I’m gay. No I just don’t feel the need to jump his bones every single time I see him?? Idk the friend thing is bothering me. Idk if I feel any joy behind it. The groinal response really really throws my perception off
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