i know i don’t want to be with a guy and my mind is playing tricks on me but i’m so fed up and it feels like this is going to be my life now. i used to be so happy but now i don’t even want to move

It’s going to be fine bro I also have this and I’m still fighting this you just have to accept the thoughts as thoughts and only that you are not your thoughts you will get better

i just feel like i don’t know anything about myself anymore.. i’ve liked girls from a young age but now it feels like maybe i was just faking it

You can recover. We all can

Its amazing we've built up all this fear and anxiety around being gay but to recover we need to do the opposite. My friend kissed another guy in public for a joke and never thought he wasnt straight, that the level I want to be at without kisskng the dude haha

Yes I never got into gay porn but I have watched transexual porn when straight porn gets boring

Yeah I stopped for about 5 days then I relapsed and masturbated and I’m not going to lie about 30 minutes later all of these thoughts popped in my head my mind even told me I was bisexual so I panicked so now I know I’m done with porn for good

We just have to be strong and hope everything gets better

even though at the time before hocd this would have never crossed my mind

Same here I had crushes on girls all of my life hocd is going to try to tell you that it was fake but is not you are straight and you can’t change that

that’s the funny part i literally know i’m straight, i know i would never do anything with a guy it’s just so hard to understand why this is happening

For me is like I get intrusive thoughts and afterwards I’m like i would never do this but for some reason my minds tries to play tricks on me

Same here I’ve heard that masturbation and watching porn also has to do with hocd

i can’t get it up to gay porn... only straight or lesbian. sorry if that’s kinda graphic. but i don’t get why i can’t take that and see that i’m NOT gay. it’s so draining that this is what i’m thinking about at all times.

Well for me what I do and it’s helped me is I force the gay thoughts and I don’t get hard no matter how long I do it for but as soon as I think about a girl I get hard

But also I stopped watching porn and I stopped masturbating I guess it kind of helped I don’t get as many gay thoughts but as soon as I masturbate I start getting them

it’s crazy how the answer is so simple. girls or boys. but we just can’t get it out of our heads

Hocd can hijack straight porn and make you think you're interested in the guy over the girl

I need to stop porn for good to regain my natural sexuality. I'm more attracted to pixels atm

i’m with you.. i’m going to try and stop for good and hopefully my old self will come back

me too. i hope that solves the issue

Yes I dont buy into the whole no fap superpowers idea, but I didn't watch porn or masturbate etc for about 45 days and hocd and social anxiety disappeared, I feel confident and attracted to women. It was beautiful

That’s awesome do you have any tips on how I could stop watching porn because it is hard the longest I went was 5 days and afterwards I started to get intrusive thoughts

These are things that help me: -keep a journal or log and every time you watch porn, look at why and make a change. For example, if you watched porn on your smartphone in your bedroom, create a new boundary by committing to placing porn blocker on phone, or no using phone in bedroom, or replacing smartphone with basic phone with no apps or Internet, etc. If we keep falling at the same hurdles the recovery process will take much longer

These changes are only temporary not forever. The aim is to be a to deal with lifes challenges and thrive without depending on porn for a quick fix

Meditation Gratitude list Affirmations Call a friend Exercise Nature Inventory Journalling Being honest Helping others, volunteering Keeping busy Friends Self improvement Focus on building a life better than your current one without porn

So you don’t have hocd anymore

Yes I have hocd but its in 'remission' at the moment. This means I'm winning the fight and it is not ruling my life. If I were to watch porn it would gain strength again

Still waiting for erp cbt from a professional but just doing the self help work

Oh that’s great so are you saying that if I stop watching porn and masturbating I will get better

I doubt you will get worse by stopping porn etc