Reassurance

I feel like I then did so much reassurance seeking on the internet and on here for the past month that I don’t even care to look anymore i see a lot of good stuff but the small amount of bad stuff my brain an heart goes with some reason I feel helpless is like I feel normal but i feel confused and odd for some reason like I’m not in control of my thought and feelings and sensories for some reason does anyone else feel like this or felt like this in the past and does it get better?have an meds and therapy took these problems away?

Young adults with OCD

JordTheNord

Date posted: 2y

I’ve been doing reassurance for years. Actually a month ago I found out I have OCD which actually just knowing I do has helped so much because it makes so much sense why I do the things I do. Remember reassurance is normal and healthy for yourself and relationships. It’s when we constantly NEED it that it becomes our burden. Even confident and non OCD ppl need reassurance from time to time. It’s human. So piece of advice, don’t focus on getting rid of reassurance entirely. Because there is are just times when your mind is curious and you just want knowledge or to at least solidify your foundation. Now when the OCD kicks in which I’m sure you know when it does we go in to the NEED mode of it. Times like that you can easily do your own ERP and just slowly work on letting the thoughts past and not getting reassurance. It takes time for sure. Eventually you have to trust yourself and know you are intelligent. One thing that helped me even though it was reassurance but the knowledge helped me figure out how to handle this process was psychology and philosophy. Also ERP was huge for me because literally my OCD episodes just happen and it’s like “sweet another opportunity to practice non reassurance” you don’t even have to go looking for it lol.

Anonymous

Date posted: 2y

@JordTheNord Thanks for the advice and I just found out I had ocd about month ago as well and I feel like I’ve been had it I just was so used to it I felt so normal I feel normal now even though I know the ocd got stronger because I was easily getting anxiety over things I could forget about and uncontrollably obsses with stuff it’s just like I’m trying to align my self with the thoughts and feelings again so I can feel how I felt a couple months ago even though I didn’t even know ocd or aware that i had it it feels like I know it’s not as bad as I’m trying to make it but I’ve then been through some many feels and thoughts it gets exhausting plus is the helplessness confusion normal?and is there anything that helped you get back to feeeling like you again

JordTheNord

Date posted: 2y

Look up backdoor spike for OCD. That can help. I felt helpless for the sake of my intrusive thoughts “I’m not good enough, I can’t do anything right, what if I’m wrong, should I have done that”. So that’s what was confusing to me. Also, just trying to experience reality because it did make me feel alone more so then my own personality. Well some advice that has helped is even on my OCD episodes or any negative feeling I have IS me. It’s not my overall being but not separating my negative from My positive attributes definitely made me feel more in control and not “torn”. My OCD, anger, sadness, and anxiety is a part of me and I need to utilize what I can from these Emotions and experiences to get to a point where I’m not letting them drown me. Everyone has OCD thoughts but we ruminate them and just hard to deal with specifically for us. However, there are things I’m sure you can do that other ppl struggle with. It’s the same thing at the basic level. But listening to philosophy and psychology books, podcast, lecture helped. Also, just time in general and knowing I wasn’t alone anymore in this. Talking stuff out helped oh I never have done this but I hear it’s amazing to do…write stuff out.

Anonymous

Date posted: 2y

@JordTheNord Thanks man I appreciate it I feel like the ocd latched on yo that “rabbit hole”thing lol

JordTheNord

Date posted: 2y

@Anonymous Dude for real!! They can be doozies lol

Anonymous

Date posted: 2y

I think when I quit wrestling with my thoughts the intrusive feelings started to really convince me but I’ve been through so many phases I peeped how contradictory ocd can be but is this me on a path to getting better is this normal?I feel like I’m down a rabbit hole or am I just tellin myself that

monte333

Date posted: 24w

Back to struggling

I posted yesterday that I was feeling better than usual, now I’m not. I knew it could happen that I start to feel bad again. I’ve been feeling like this is the worst it’s been so far but that can’t be true because nothing has changed I’m always afraid of doing something bad, have done something bad, or are capable of doing something bad. I posted a TW on this post just in case. My main thing is I’m afraid of being a certain kind of bad person. I won’t mention it I know people will understand probably who I mean. I know it’s an OCD type, and I’ve been looking up different instances of people with this same subtype and sometimes I find someone in my same situation and I feel relief, for a moment at least. But then I think I might be different. I’m seeing my therapist Friday, and I’m always nervous talking to them because I want to not sound like I’m crazy. Sometimes I’m like you must’ve done something bad to feel this way or, you’re a bad person and should feel bad. There’s so much I wish I could do to help with this. I fall back into a spiral anytime I feel better because I feel like why would I feel good now if I wasn’t before. Sorry for the rant everyone. I just feel bad now and I’m worried I’ll never feel normal again. Hopefully someone else has felt or feels the same. I want to not feel like this, I wish I could go back to when I was young and undiagnosed to get the correct diagnosis early. I feel like my meds aren’t helping anymore which is concerning because like my anxiety should be gone right? Idk, and idk why I have felt really good recently but now after spiraling I’m back at it. Sometimes I’m worried it’s not ocd even though I have plenty of signs AND was officially diagnosed. Again sorry for the long post, just needed to air out how I felt

Flyfishingguy

User type: OCD Conqueror

Date posted: 24w

Feeling better or something different ?

Does anyone find that sometimes they can’t tell if they are feeling better or if they are ruminating or doing internal checks and compulsions to feel better? I sort of go back and forth on this, some days I am really able to let thoughts kind of roll through my head and when I’m doing it right it creates a lot of anxiety in my body, but my mind feels more empty and more quiet but physically people around me can tell I’m in distress. Then Sometimes I think I’m feeling better because the anxiety feeling in my chest is gone and my body feels light and people think I’m in a better mood but then I realize I’m reassuring my self over in my mind and on those days my mind feels so full and loud and like I’m in a battle but those are the days that are easier for loved ones around me. I am a people pleaser on top of this so it’s easy for me to slip into the rumination and internal compulsions to make others around me feel more comfortable. I don’t know if anyone else goes through this kind of back and forth but it’s so draining. Also if anyone has any good material my wife could read to help her understand this stuff more that would be really appreciated

nae nae

Date posted: 13w

Tired of feeling like a bad person

I genuinely can't help but feel irredeemable over every little mistake made or regret I've had. It's so up and down, but I just miss the certainty. Knowing "this is who I am." I'm so disconnected from myself. Like, I'm really, really trying. Today is really rough... I got triggered the other night, and it's been hell since. I've been fighting seeking reassurance. I want it so, so incredibly bad, but I know it won't help me :( Some days, I just don't want to be here. It's funny because yesterday I felt amazing until I got triggered. I just immediately spiraled after that. I don't know. Does it genuinely get better? Will therapy really help me? Sometimes, I think maybe this is the best it'll get, and that scares me. Sorry for the vent. I'm just feeling so overwhelmingly anxious right now. I can't even cry (due to Zoloft). It feels claustrophobic somehow, having all these emotions trapped inside of my body with nowhere to go 😭

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