- Date posted
- 6y
- Date posted
- 6y
What that guy was/is a great opportunity for you to do ERP. Stay with the uncertainty and the panic - it won't kill you, I promise. Let it be there, unsolved. It would be a great blow to your OCD.
- Date posted
- 6y
Become friends with him and tell him to say that to you on a constant basis and suddenly all the time. That would be best Exposure for ERP and best when you least expect.
- Date posted
- 6y
What happened before this? How did you react? Was it intended as a joke or serious insight or what? I dont ask any of these questions to deduce the legitimacy of his claim — I’m sure it has none. I only ask to understand the situation more and see where some cognitive distortions or confirmation bias may have come in.
- Date posted
- 6y
This person definitely doesn’t have some kind of insight into you that you do not. He obviously has a few preconceived notions about how gay/straight people are supposed to act that are pretty rigid, unreasonable, and demonstrably false. I’m sorry he decided to say this to you. Even if you did not have OCD, this would have been an incredibly rude thing to say. Anyone who tries to tell others how they feel is just a jerk. To me it seems this person has very rigid ideas about sexuality that probably stem from his own insecurities.
- Date posted
- 6y
@Esosa oh, wasn't aware of that. But my point was, whatever triggers us, we should take that and turn it into something positive.
- Date posted
- 6y
Some may not agree with me. But my best friend and I will play video games and he'll just randomly make a gay joke or whatever and its definitely good ERP. (If you dont agree with my methods then keep it to yourself commenters)
- Date posted
- 6y
I know your struggle. My situation is not the same but one of my friends triggered my HOCD a couple days ago. All she said in a text was “You have a sexy bod!” And it sent me spiraling into an obsession that I have a crush on her. Stay strong! Just know that thoughts do not make you! If you’re concerned about being gay then it means you’re not. I know how it’s hard with friends though!
- Date posted
- 6y
Just ride it out. Let it take its course and just say "okay, so what" fighting it will only make it worse.
- Date posted
- 6y
It was a very random addition to a conversation that I wasn’t even a part of... he said it as what he thought was a serious insight and then after he said it, one of my other friends that knows me slightly better responded to it by basically defending my straightness. I just can’t shake the thought that he said it because of some insight that he has on me that I may be clueless to myself. This just feels so real right now and I’m having trouble coping.
- Date posted
- 6y
@Anonymous22 I get what you’re trying to say with his friend doing ERP, but he’s not responsible for that at all. I know a good friend will help out, but this is more of a solo effort because the friend might not always be there with him.
- Date posted
- 6y
Yeah I got your point
Related posts
- Date posted
- 19w
i had recently been triggered to have so-ocd. its been on my mind non-stop. (i am a heterosexual female) and my mind has been all over the place questioning if i have been in denial the entire time. ive always had people tell me they sort of got that vibe it it never really affected me until my own mother had her suspicions. so i would constantly get triggered un public around the same gender, while knowing my true sexuality. ive always been attracted to men but as of recently ive been having super bad anxiety to where i cannot eat or sleep and feel weak all the time. it was like that for a week or so. now im in the calm where i have been trying accept the uncertainty but it still isnt fair as im getting triggered. im a little worried because it feels like i have been lying to my parents the entire time although ive never had the desire to be with the same gender. and i keep getting intrusive thoguhts that make me feel anxious and uncomfortable. its all starting to affect my friendships as im constantly getting triggered with the intrusive thoguhts. i feel a little less anxious compared to how i was a couple days ago. im really scared on why im having these thoughts now when i have been having romantic feelings for a guy the past year or so. ive also been struggling with false attraction and loss attraction to men. it makes me feel uncertain of my life the entire time
- Date posted
- 14w
Hey guys, this last week has been pretty rough for me mentally for some reason. Today in particular I’m having a pretty bad episode. For some reason about 30 minutes ago, I randomly started remembering watching the Step Up movies growing up. I remember seeing Channing Tatum in that movie and think he’s attractive, along with some other men I think. Then I started to wonder if that means that I’m into men, because I somewhat remember getting a negative feeling about it from that young age. I looked up on Google if it’s possible to not realize your gay, and the ai thing said yes and started talking about something called latent homosexuality. It also so said that some people start sleeping with a particular before ever actually discovering their sexuality. This makes me want to take a panted homosexual test, or something. Lately I’ve also been wanting to dive into my past with my therapist to try to see where my “ocd” stems from (if I even have it) or if I’m truly gay and have just be conditioned to be straight. I’ve been spiralling guys and I need was honesty and wisdom. Can anybody help me ?
- Date posted
- 13w
Hey everyone, I’m reaching out because I’ve been going through one of the hardest mental spirals of my life, and I’m hoping someone can relate or shed light on what’s happening to me. About 4 months ago, I accidentally came across a trans porn scene. It didn’t do much at the time, but later it triggered this overwhelming intrusive thought: “What if I’m gay?” Since then, it’s been absolute hell. I’ve always been into women—emotionally, sexually, everything. I’ve been in a long-term relationship with a girl I love deeply. But after that moment, my brain started spiraling into nonstop analysis. I began checking how I felt around men, whether I felt attraction, whether I was in denial, whether I was lying to myself. Literally everything became a test. I got stuck in this loop: • A thought pops in → panic • Try to solve it → brief relief • Another thought → worse panic • Repeat. At times, it got so bad I couldn’t feel anything at all—toward my girlfriend, toward women, toward myself. I started doubting everything. Some days, I feel emotionally flat, like I’ve lost my personality. Other days, I wake up with a full-body jolt of “truth” like “I’m definitely gay”—only for it to fade into numbness again. I’ve also noticed that I get short bursts of peace when I stop reacting, but then the fear comes back louder, like “See? Now you’re accepting it. That means it’s true.” Therapy hasn’t helped much so far—it felt more like general counseling. They told me to sit with the thoughts, but didn’t clarify if this was OCD, identity questioning, or trauma. That just made it worse because now I’m back to thinking “What if I’m just rejecting my truth?” I’m exhausted. I’ve lost connection to everything I used to love. • I want to love my girl again the way I used to • I want to feel desire without overthinking • I want to trust myself again I’m not looking for reassurance—I just want to know if anyone else has gone through something like this, and if this sounds like HOCD or identity OCD. Thanks for reading.
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