- Date posted
- 6y
- Date posted
- 6y
@phoenix2020 I only ask Bc I do get doubts about my current bf but Ik I love him I just have ocd
- Date posted
- 6y
Tell yourself it didn't work out with ex's because it wasn't meant to be. Everything happens for a reason what is meant to be will be. How I look at my last relationships and my ex's is that they taught me lessons. Not sure if this helps.
- Date posted
- 6y
I’d tell my brain, “you’re right, i could have stuck around longer and continued in those relationships. But I didn’t. And I’m here now and have a boyfriend I love. So I accept that I’ll never know what might have happened had I stayed.” And accept the uncertainty.
- Date posted
- 6y
You can either think and say everything happens for a reason and one thing leads to another until you reach the next destination...Or you can laugh at it and say as Barney says in HIMUM “New is always better” :)
- Date posted
- 6y
I’m just scared Bc now it’s like “if he came back tmrw would u go for him” and I’m scared and worried and ugh
- Date posted
- 6y
First of all nothing to be scared of...Secondly try to differentiate between an obsession/trigger and a fact about your feelings...if you re just feeling bad that you see yourself with your EX if he decides to come back while you re with your new BF then use exposure/imagination and bring up the level of panic by seeing it as if it already happens...BUT if you re having doubts about your current relation and thats the trigger for your thoughts then its a different story
- Date posted
- 6y
Wdym it’s a different story? I don’t want to love my ex and I hate having these thoughts
- Date posted
- 6y
Then my dear its just another ocd trick that you dont have to worry about...try To do the exercise...this thought comes because of a certain trigger...use the exposure technic and with time it goes away...nothing to be scared of or worried about
- Date posted
- 6y
But what did u mean by current relation and having doubts?
- Date posted
- 6y
When in doubt, always treat it as OCD.
- Date posted
- 6y
@aholcomb17...i am so sorry if you felt that i was questioning your doubts...i didnt mean that...i know that you love your bf...we all that have the honor of fighting the Ocd battle get to go this dark tunnel and sometimes cant see the light and then doubts start attacking us from everywhere...just close your eyes and search for the light at the end of the tunnel and by seeing it through yourself you can rest assured that no doubt can change the fact of who you are and what you feel...your love is so genuine that you sometimes make yourself feel these doubts just to make sure that you re giving everything you have...dont judge yourself because of OCD...thats the main fuel it lives on...
Related posts
- User type
- OCD Conqueror
- Date posted
- 24w
Ok I need any and all advice 😭 please help. I’ve been with my boyfriend for over 2 years and feel deeply connected and happy and in love with him. My ex and I were first loves and on and off basically for 5 or so years until I met my current bf. During that time we both were toxic and back and forth and he did some things that were really hurtful. We never really had an “ending” or any actual closure to anything? I just kind of started talking to and liking my current boyfriend. I saw my ex a month ish ago at the bar and wasn’t very nice to him. I was like hyper aware of how I was behaving around him to make sure he didn’t get the wrong idea. I know he has had a really hard time moving on from me. Since then I feel like I have not been able to stop thinking about the past and am questioning a ton about my feelings. I do have ROCD, and I don’t know if this is solely because of that or a mix of that and the emotional loose ends? I don’t know. But I’m feeling such an urge to text him this whole paragraph I’ve drafted about closure, how I don’t even need him to respond, but I just need to get some things off my chest. I feel SO conflicted about sending it. I do not want to rekindle anything with him, but it’s just the principle of texting your ex that makes me feel like I am betraying my boyfriend now. Yet it feels like it’s weighing on me so much - and I’m like is ocd involved? I just don’t know if I should send the text or not. If anyone has been in similar situations or has any helpful advice I would really love and appreciate some because I feel so stuck.
- Date posted
- 20w
Do you ever feel like you wonder if your ocd would be less if you were with someone else? Or would it be better if you were with someone else? I’m really upset because I used to be able to enjoy myself even with the anxiety and now it’s like i am just analyzing and I don’t have feelings and I’m irritated because there’s things that frustrate me about him that I don’t like and my brain says if I was with someone else I would be able to deal with those things better and that we just aren’t right for each other. And the thoughts that used to make me anxious about breaking up don’t like it’s really me that feels it. I know no relationship is perfect but it’s like my brain keeps saying with someone else I wouldn’t feel like this or I would but I’d be able to handle it better. It feels like I have to just start fresh with someone new cause the ocd got too into this to the point where I don’t feel or even know what’s real. It feels like fear and anxiety and just being so into this has just made me feel not into this anymore but idk if I’m thinking right. It’s also just warped the way I see him like I only see the negatives and my brain keeps saying you don’t feel this cause it’s wrong. And it’s depressing bc of how happy and safe I used to feel. I’m supposed to see him soon and it’s like I want to but also don’t because I feel like things have changed unless that’s just something I made in my head and cause I don’t feel the feelings I used to. But then I think I will just be this way with someone else but then my brain says otherwise and it’s so confusing. People keep telling me not to make decisions because I’m fogged but it feels like I’m not. Like my brain is manipulating me. And also like all the things I used to like I’ve somehow turned into like distaste which is so upsetting. I would like to think this is just ocd taking control and confusing me and distorting my perspective but I’m scared it’s not and that my feelings are gone. Has anyone experienced this but it was still ocd?
- Date posted
- 17w
Ok so this all could be for reassurance but I’m rlly upset en and need help. So to preface, I had ocd when I was younger her and when I started dating my current bf it suddenly returned but ig I didn’t realize it was rocd bc I never knew it could present itself in this way. All I knew was “go away I just wanna love my bf and stop liking other guys” when my brain would get me so confused. A couple weeks ago I started on Luvox and I thought it was rlly working bc I also started seeing an ocd specialist and she gave great tips on exposures and the Medication in conjunction w that jus felt like it finally make me myself again. However, yesterday I had some gwneral intrusive thoughts in the morning and right before that, I was on top of the world so happy bc I was myself again. When the thoughts came I was like ew oh whatever. UNTIL my brain was like nagging me and making me feel guilty for having those thoughts. So I dove into em making sure they weren’t true etc. bc that never fixes anything it kept progressively getting worse and I forgot my exposures in those moments bc I just wanted to make sure I loved my man and didn’t do smth against him. Towards the later day, I was swimming w my siblings and my bf and the whole time I had a blast bc he’s the best, but I had nagging thoughts and feelings saying some guy from my new job is similar looking but slightly better looking and he’s the one guy I’ll leave my bf for. And it’s been saying that and variations of it from over 24 hrs now and I feel so awful. I feel guilty and to make things worse. Last night bc I spiraled/ relapsed so hard my thoughts also said I wanna leave my bf bc I no longer love him and I miss those old feelings but I can’t jus forget how awful I am as a gf to him bc my thoughts and ocd feelings. I feel terrible and I jus wanna be fixed😓I don’t wanna like that guy my man is my bsf and so cute and handsome and perfect. Why am I still “confused” if I don’t wanna be etc. my therapist said to go toward my goals and Values and not let ocd stop me from it, but I feel as if I can’t til I make sure I don’t like the other person or wanna but all I want is to be me but I feel like a liar 😞
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