- Username
- AnaHills
- Date posted
- 5y ago
Only you know the answer!
What I learned is that I’m not actually gay I know I’m not actually gay I just say to myself it’s just the OCD and that the thoughts will go away I also contradict the thoughts by flirting with girls and hitting on woman so when I get that voice “you are gay” I go wait a minute if I’m gay then why am I hitting on woman all the time then also I’ve always liked girls so I know I’m not gay being in a relationship I noticed helps get rid of the thoughts
A jctually i have a boyfriend, sometimes i feel i use him to “pretend” im straight. And also the medium told me If i marry him by that time it would be pure compromise because i care a lot what other people say, especially my family. But inside myself i dont feel like that, my oldest sister is married with a woman, she is sexologist and we don’t deny her. I feel i must be like her. Its so confusing, i feel like a ➰ bucle.
Also try not to focus on the thoughts because I noticed for me that it made it so much worse just ignore it dont let it bother you and if you start getting the thoughts do something to get your mind off of it it helps a lot and eventually over time the thoughts tend to die down and basically vanish
Thanks for the advice :) since when do u have HOCD ?
I’ve had HOCD when I was a kid but then it went away and it just came back recently.
But I learned how to control it
I’m in turmoil trying to figure out if I’m a homosexual. I keep thinking I’m homosexual but never believed that I was until very recently and have had multiple heterosexual relationships. I cannot tell what is real and what is not anymore and I’m losing my mind. I have no idea of whether I am heterosexual, homosexual or bi-sexual? I can accept being bi-sexual as it means the relationships that I had were not fake or simply a cover up. However my counsellor has told me that I’ve more than likely repressed all my homosexuality and used my relationships as a cover. Has anyone had serious trouble with their sexuality and can you please help? This is horrible
Just a quick message of caution. Before I was diagnosed with HOCD, I was convinced I turning exclusively Gay, so I went to a therapist, shaking, full of dread, fear and anxiety, I explained to him my instrusive thoughts, urges and feelings.... And to paraphrase, he said the reason I was feeling this is way is because, and I quote "you are repressing your sexuality", "if you do not come out as openly gay and live the lifestyle, you will forever be miserable and always anxious", "I advice you to re concile between your faith and your sexuality or else you will continue to remain depressed forever" and he went on and on and on (I was shivering with extreme fear the whole time) That was without a doubt, one of the worst days of my life, I left the room with extreme fear, believing everything he said, convinced I needed to come out and begin the process of living as a gay man, even though I WAS DYING internally. I am not homophobic however I don't desire to live as a gay man (even if i do have sexual intrusive thoughts about males) I don't desire to be sexually active with the same sex, again my own personal choice, nothing against those who choose otherwise. So please be cautious regarding the therapist you see, ensure they are a OCD specialist because a general therapist who has NO idea regarding Pure O OCD will only make things worse.
I have a problem maybe you guys can help, Im 27 years old and NEVER doubt that about my sexuality before, i was (i think im still) girl crazy and i have nothing against gay people i have friends how are gay, i was working nights shifts like for 3 months straight and not sleeping at all, and one day i was drinking and smoking weed, having a good time and from no where this thought that i might be gay appears, and have been struggling for about 5 months from now, i now i have a crush on this girl we are even dating but some times it thoughs feels so real like im on a denial and get depressed i used to be a happy person with out doubts about my sexuality i mean im 27 years i should have seen this coming long time ago if its real right? At this point I don't know what to do i live in a country that therapy is hard to find especially this kind im taking some medication but i need help this is taking my life and im afraid that im liying to my girlfriend, what should i do ? Is this HOCD or im on a denial? ( Sorry about my English, is not my first language)
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