- Date posted
- 6y
- Date posted
- 6y
You can tell if you like it. I know it sounds blunt - but myself im gay. And I've had OCD where I think I'm straight - but at the end of the day if I were straight then I would be with a woman? I'm so comfortable with it now that I even tell me my friends that maybe one day I will be with a woman - but by accepting it and not fighting the thought I realise there is no attraction there. Its so difficult when you are in that anxious stage of mind I know! But if you allow yourself to give in to the thoughts and accept maybe you are bisexual or gay - I think you'll find that when it comes to it, you probably wont be. Nature is nature and even OCD cant make you feel love for someone you dont. I hope this helps :) It's the same with Trans OCD - I almost had bad anxiety over it but after I realised that trans people like being trans, they just fight societies view on it. Same with being gay - the only thing that stopped me from coming out was what other people would think - for me accepting myself was easier.
- Date posted
- 6y
@logan123 man this line was great “even ocd can’t make you feel love for someone you don’t.” For me, it helps to put things in context. For example, on Monday I was out with friends and found myself super attracted to a woman at the bar we were at. Didn’t even think anything of it. But, when I smoked with my buddy Friday night, I bugged out on whether or not I could be attracted to him. Was I? Am I? I was just resisting and combating the thoughts of my sexuality in that moment ya know? It was that battle with my thoughts that tripped me out...not the actual attraction/or not to my male friend. It’s hard in the moment but honestly mindfulness meditation does wonders for compartmentalizing your thoughts.
- Date posted
- 6y
@blindpeach Thanks dude! Yeah exactly you cracked it there. OCD is the king of overthinking overthinking? I find the more open I am to being free and not caring the more defined I actually become. E.g yesterday I was with a quite androgynous female. She was coming on to me - I'm gay so I wouldn't do anything - but I started to question whether I would and if i found her attractive. But I allowed myself to relax and allowed myself to accept her beauty but realised I'm really not attracted Haha. Once you stop fighting you can see much clearer.
- Date posted
- 5y
can ocd make you feel like you want something yet you don’t?
- Date posted
- 5y
Yep - classic OCD
Related posts
- Date posted
- 25w
So basically, I don’t know when this started, but basically whenever I look at a girl, a girl on a phone screen, or even a cartoon that’s a girl, I have this weird tendency that I like them, even though I’m straight. And though I am fairly young (still a teen), I’m positive that I’m straight, but my mind is giving me these weird feelings and signals that I’m not. And disclaimer, I do not have a problem with people with other kinds of sexualities, but I am feared for my life about this. I’ve honestly been keeping these tough emotions and feelings in me for days now. I don’t want to tell my mom because I don’t want her to think bad of me, and we also live in a Catholic household, so the thought of having a different sexuality is a lot on us. I’ve done some of my research, and since I’ve had many different types of OCD for quite some time, I’ve come to the conclusion that apparently I have SO-OCD or HOCD (basically the same thing.) I don’t know if this is true or not. But some other websites have told me that it’s just a part of being a teenager and growing up, and finding what love interest suits you the most, but I honestly have no pleasure with this whatsoever! I constantly think about, “oh, what if you like this girl right there?” Every time I walk past a girl, and sometimes my mind agrees with it, but deep down I don’t want this. And even sometimes, when I’m watching a video, or looking at boys in real life, looking at boy cartoon characters, most of the time, my mind tells me, “this boy is cute. I am attracted to him.” But other times, I completely disagree with that statement. Same with girls, so I don’t know. And also my mind tells me, or something in me tells me that the guys at school that I like, I don’t like them anymore, and instead I look at the girls, in which I know that I’m not attracted to, so it’s just a continuous cycle like that and I don’t know how to stop it. Someone please help because I don’t really know how to explain this, it’s just tough on me.
- Date posted
- 10w
I’ve been struggling with HOCD for years, and it started with an intrusive thought about being gay when I was younger. It came up at age 12 and ever since, I’ve been trapped in a cycle of doubt and anxiety. I obsess over whether or not I’m secretly gay, even though I don’t feel that way at all. What makes it worse is the fear that I might have internalized homophobia, and that’s why I’m having these obsessive thoughts. I worry that my anxiety is a sign that I’m repressing something or rejecting part of myself. It feels like my mind keeps repeating the same question—am I gay?—and no matter how much reassurance I get, the fear doesn’t go away. I used to pray for my family members, fearing that if I didn’t, something bad would happen to them, and now it feels like I have to control these thoughts, or something will go wrong. For a while, it was quieter, but a week ago, the thoughts spiraled up again, and now the anxiety feels overwhelming again. It’s exhausting, and I don’t know how to break free from this constant loop of doubt. Has anyone dealt with the fear of internalized homophobia alongside HOCD? How do you manage the anxiety that comes with it?
- Date posted
- 5w
Hey everyone, I’m reaching out because I’ve been going through one of the hardest mental spirals of my life, and I’m hoping someone can relate or shed light on what’s happening to me. About 4 months ago, I accidentally came across a trans porn scene. It didn’t do much at the time, but later it triggered this overwhelming intrusive thought: “What if I’m gay?” Since then, it’s been absolute hell. I’ve always been into women—emotionally, sexually, everything. I’ve been in a long-term relationship with a girl I love deeply. But after that moment, my brain started spiraling into nonstop analysis. I began checking how I felt around men, whether I felt attraction, whether I was in denial, whether I was lying to myself. Literally everything became a test. I got stuck in this loop: • A thought pops in → panic • Try to solve it → brief relief • Another thought → worse panic • Repeat. At times, it got so bad I couldn’t feel anything at all—toward my girlfriend, toward women, toward myself. I started doubting everything. Some days, I feel emotionally flat, like I’ve lost my personality. Other days, I wake up with a full-body jolt of “truth” like “I’m definitely gay”—only for it to fade into numbness again. I’ve also noticed that I get short bursts of peace when I stop reacting, but then the fear comes back louder, like “See? Now you’re accepting it. That means it’s true.” Therapy hasn’t helped much so far—it felt more like general counseling. They told me to sit with the thoughts, but didn’t clarify if this was OCD, identity questioning, or trauma. That just made it worse because now I’m back to thinking “What if I’m just rejecting my truth?” I’m exhausted. I’ve lost connection to everything I used to love. • I want to love my girl again the way I used to • I want to feel desire without overthinking • I want to trust myself again I’m not looking for reassurance—I just want to know if anyone else has gone through something like this, and if this sounds like HOCD or identity OCD. Thanks for reading.
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