Whenever I start talking to a guy if I don’t know if I like him or am not excited when he texts me it automatically makes me think I’m a lesbian. My mind starts telling me that I wouldn’t feel like this if it was a woman. And I get images and scenarios that feel real and like I like them/want them. I’m so confused all the time and feel like I’m going to be alone forever
I felt this so much. OCD will use any little thing provoke you and continue the cycle of doubt. I went through the same thing when I was talking to a guy and it hurt so bad, but I tried to keep moving forward. My advice is to keep talking to him despite having those thoughts. It’s going to be difficult, but doing this tells OCD that these thoughts don’t actually hold as much power as we give it.
@blazed I’m a guy and before these I was fully convinced I was going to marry this girl. Now it makes me think I ain’t attracted to her or I don’t love her😞 I get so many thoughts which make my heart beat out my chest in fear and anxiety. Have I got ocd?
@Anonymous I’m so sorry you’re dealing with this. This sounds like OCD, but, you will doubt that no matter how much reassurance you receive. The only way to know is by working with an OCD specialist. Things will get easier, keep going.
@blazed Yeah I spoke to someone today and they said u have ocd. We are working on a plan. But these thoughts still say I don’t have ocd and I’m in denial and that I’m gay. Does it get better?
@Anonymous That’s great to hear! I have those types of thoughts as well, and everyone else here does too! And yes, it does get better but with a lot of hard work. I’d say I’m 90% recovered from this theme and it was an uphill battle that I didn’t think I’d make it out of. It’s a painful journey, but so incredibly worth it.
@blazed also, did it change ur sexuality? Or does it jus get rid of the thoughts and keeps u the same as u have been
@Anonymous You’re looking for certainty which doesn’t exist. I know you want answers, but that only feeds OCD and makes it worse. The most important thing to keep in mind is that the content of your thoughts doesn’t matter; it’s not actually about your sexual orientation. It’s about wanting certainty.
@blazed Yeah I do understand that😭 it’s acc hard to deal with it cuz it’s like a maybe maybe not even tho I know I’m comfortable around girls, and then the fact that I can’t get it up anymore, sex drive been tarnished, it’s acc hard to deal with. Amount of times I’ve wanted to die and kill myself because of this .😭 as an ocd beater, pls tell me I can beat this and there will be light at the end of the tunnel. Makes me feel like I don’t like my girl anymore, tells me stuff like I won’t get married, won’t have kids, etc
@Anonymous To a girl*
@blazed Also did it change ur sexuality? Or have u remained as u were happily after beating ocd ?
@blazed - Hey girl -how long did you have so-ocd for and from what ages? Started at 21 for me and I'm currently 24. I want it to end so badly.
@zeebee1 I first started experiencing SO-OCD when I was 17, but just for a short period of time. It went away briefly for about 5 months, but came back again after that (in early 2022) and stuck with me ever since. It’s been around 1.5 years of having this theme so far and it’s truly been hell 😅 but therapy has helped me so much. Do you have access to an OCD specialist?
I've always found women pretty and admired them since I was younger, never wanted to be with them or anything. I always pictured having a boyfriend and my crushes were always boys. I have a boyfriend now but because this has happened I feel nothing towards him or any men. To be honest I'm so exhausted I don't feel much at all, there was so much anxiety at the start and now there is none. Does that mean I have accepted the thoughts. My mind keeps going you were suppressed all these years but I do find women pretty so that's what's making it worse. Am I just in denial and being delusional? I never doubted my sexuality before this I always considered myself to be straight but I feels like my mind has been twisted and can't remember any attraction to guys but can remember thinking girls are pretty? Does this mean it's all real? I don't know anymore
I feel sick to my stomach, a few days ago I knew I was straight and could picture my life with my bf again. The anxiety has really lessend and Im more depressed now. I'm 100% convinced I am lesbian even tho I have never had sexual attraction to women, found them pretty but never wanted to be with them. My mind is only picturing me being with women now and it feels like a pit in my stomach. I don't feel emotion now, I'm also on my period. I don't want to be lesbian. I want to be with my boyfriend and have the life I pictured with him. My memory is so dissorted right now. I don't think there's anything wrong with being lesbian, it's just not for me and now that makes me feel like I'm homophobic.
So i started to feel like a lesbian again and that i have to be one. I dont want to be one. I just dont. But being straight feel like a lie now. I question my whole life, my feelings and everything. The biggest indicator of this must be that i will be slowly 21 year old and ive never dated anyone and i dont really find anyone attractive and i dont even know if i truly was attracted to someone and im scared of relationships i might have trauma or have anxious avoidant attachment. Help me. I do feel lost. Really lost. I dont know who am I anymore. I feel like that i must have been gay my whole life now. I feel like an alien. I sometimes feel like 2 people are living inside of me.😞😞😞
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