- Date posted
- 1y
And I did it again...
I feel like shit... For context, my cats mostly live in the kitchen (not my decision) and I told my parents weeks ago not to put forks and knives in those silverware cups on the sink as I was afraid my cats would get hurt when jumping on the sink and to store them in the oven instead (we don’t use it for cooking). My room and the kitchen and next to each other and so are out windows so I’ve developped the fear of my electronics emitting EM waves or ultrasounds when using or charging them, or just regular sound while watching youtube videos, that my cats might get curious about and thus jumping on the sink which is right next to the kitchen window and that they might hurt themselves if a knife or fork was left there. I also developped a fear of not leaving food in room in fear they would smell it and once again jump on the sink. This afternoon, I thought to myself I would remind my parents they should not put silverware in the cups on the sink once they woke from their nap, as they have a tendency to forget or downplay my fears over time. If you’re wondering, I didn’t go and check myself if they had respected my wish so far since I can’t close doors if I know my cats are on the other side of said door since I’m afraid to stuck their paw in the closing door or at least some of their hair and hurt them without being able to know (I know they might yell in pain but I can’t convince my brain they won’t hide away their pain as some cats do, and just having hait isn’t immediately painful until they eventually try to get away from the door and pull on it). So I took the bet that they respected out agreement until I could go check for myself once they woke up and plugged some of my electronics that I needed for tomorrow’s class (I had recently broken my good charging cable for my tablet and had to use the shitty one that sometimes doesn’t even fully charge my tablet overnight so I decided to charge it in the middle of the afternoon, also my phone that I only charge once every week and used my pc in the meantime which makes even more EM waves), I reallly thought they would be understanding but when I went to check the kitchen, one HUGE knife with the saw-like cutting edge was sticking out of one of the cups and my heart dropped... I might have hurt my cat by using and charging all my electronics all afternoon and eating snacks they might have smelled and feel terrible because I could just have waited a few hours before doing all that and my electronics would have probably been charged anyways in the morning and I wasn’t that hungry, I feel terrible. Also this morning while I still was half asleep, I thought about moving my airpod charging case further away from the window while it was charging my earbuds but didn’t and thought my cats wouldn’t pick up in the charging sound but after a few minutes trying to fall back asleep I heard a cat yelling out of my window and felt bad cause it might have been one of my cats but could also have been a stray cat a’d will have no idea ever. I keep making shitty decisions and am a garbage human being and keep hurting my pets...