I’m honestly losing😞 soocd is so hard to fight I’m getting new battles everyday. Pls can someone tell me if this gets better and that it doesn’t prove my sexual orientation 😞. Sexual orientation does not change why would mine change all of a sudden. It makes me question myself and less confidence now. I hate it sm
I had this theme for 2 years and I’ve been totally free of it for over a year! Freedom came when I finally just accepted that I don’t know the answer, and I won’t ever be able to figure it out. My mind won’t be happy if I say “I’m straight”, it also won’t be happy with “I’m gay”. Those are too definitive of answers for ocd. So instead I just say “I don’t know what I am, but it really doesn’t matter” once I actually accepted that, I got better
U are asking for reassurance bro
You are answering your own question…proving to yourself that ocd is playing with you
@Bbogdan I can’t help it anymore. EVEEYTHING is crumbling. My love life, my friendship life, so much is crumbling. And I hate it sm
@Anonymous I understand bro. I had the same feeling. Best is to just persevere through and keep staying strong and pushing yourself. You will eventually come out of this dark cave 💪
@Bbogdan I have moments of relief in the day😞
@Anonymous The best thing is to try and not have such a fight or flight response to your thoughts. This is very hard but eventually your brain will start to ignore these thoughts
@Bbogdan It feels so real tho bro😭 put that wjrh false attraction and so much more
@Bbogdan Also, I saw somin abt religion and being gay or somin and that triggered it a lot for me. Is that apart of soocd? Is that ocd playing tricks on me ?
@Anonymous Wdym?
@Bbogdan Like I saw somin abt being gay in a religion and I’m not gay obvs but it said somin like it’s bad and that triggered it more because my head has me convinced I’m gay when I’m not and I hate it sm can that be a trigger
@Dmsth Like I saw somin abt being gay in a religion and I’m not gay obvs but it said somin like it’s bad and that triggered it more because my head has me convinced I’m gay when I’m not and I hate it sm can that be a trigger
@Anonymous Yeah I mean I’m no expert but it seems like something soocd would do to you
@Dmsth Like I’m Muslim and I’ve never thought badly abt gays however I would never connect w em. I saw somin on timtok and it’s triggered me more than ever. I jus wanna be straight and be happy😭 why is soocd so hard to battle
@Anonymous It’s because it’s egodystonic so it attacks the things you value the most. Both of us value being straight and have been happy being straight, however soocd uses this to attack us and make us doubt something we never even thought about
@Dmsth So does that count religion, my girlfriend, my friendships?
@Anonymous Well idk I’m not an expert sorry bro haha. But for example for me at the start it used my friends and family to the point where it would make me think I had a crush on my male friends or family
I just need to talk with someone about hocd…it feels so real and i feel like im lying to myself and have been in denial for my whole life. Please help it would mean alot🙏
I’ve completely lost myself. I can’t focus on my studies, I can’t go to the gym. Dang it I can’t even be around my male friends normally anymore. I got no idea why or how this happened but the only thing I know for sure is that I never questioned my sexuality neither doubted it. I never cared in general. I just liked girls. I keep testing and keep testing and keep testing my arousal but no matter how many times I see but I don’t feel the same way for guys that I do with girls my mind will always try to make me believe that I am gay. It’s like it’s forcing me into an identity I never asked for. But at the end of the day like my psychologist told me. Sexuality doesn’t change. So since I never felt anything for guys in my life it’s ocd. I’ve been up and down for 5 months now and while the last week I was feeling way better. Monday now and I’m back to zero. I just want to go back when everything was normal. I can’t keep living with this.
As a lesbian with SO-OCD, I feel so helpless. It's truly exhausting because no one I know understands what I'm going through. The first response is always, "You're just confused" or "You don't have to know yet." But that's not the issue, I do know. I just never see any lesbians with SO-OCD so I feel so invalidated. These thoughts flood my brain constantly, forcing me to analyze my reactions to every man I see. I feel trapped in an endless cycle of "testing" myself, trying to prove that I don't like them. But my brain fights back, telling me I do want to love a man, making it feel real even though don't want it. It's terrifying. At this point, it's hard to even hold onto my identity as a lesbian because I'm so overwhelmed. I don't know if this is what real attraction is supposed to feel like, and that fear eats away at me. The truth is, when I think about being with a man, all I feel is disgust and fear-but my brain twists that into doubt. I hate it. I'm at the point where I'm scared I'm going to have to accept something I don't want because I don't know if this will ever go away. I miss who I was before all this.
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