How do you practice to be more present, not spend too much time thinking you will break up, or dont see a future together, and what has helped you during intimacy, for me its really hard like i never want ti even talk about it, i get very anxious, and start thinking that must mean something, but i know i want to be with my partner.
think about the reasons and what brought you guys together in the first place. I struggle with this too, don’t let arguments and fights push you to break up. Stress will cause you to lack intimacy. Always think what brought you together and the great memories, all the positive things. What makes a great relationship is pushing through the imperfections and flaws. Trust me, communication is key when it comes to how you feel about the relationship. I was scared to tell my boyfriend how I felt but he has made me feel better about myself and our relationship although I still struggle with rocd, it is not a death sentence to your relationship.
Practicing mindfulness in this instance is simple but also hard and you’ll need to do this a lot at first and continue doing it. The moment you catch yourself drifting off from the present moment, compassionately bro g yourself back to the present.
Thank you all💖🫶🏼 it’s really difficult, because i look back and remember all the times i’ve felt disconnected and still kept pushing through, but it feels like im lying just to not break up, it’s sad. I want to be happy again, and stop doubting. Be happy, but also make him happy. Because like this i literally feel worried it’s going to end or that it has to end so i can feel better
@Anonimo05 in a relationship there will be times you feel like you are “disconnected” but please remember that no relationship is perfect. Actually no one is perfect, in every relationship there will be imperfections, arguments, fighting, disagreements etc. You aren’t supposed to feel like you are in love 24/7 that’s impossible, even if you broke up and dated someone else, you are gonna feel disconnected and not in love 24/7. Love isn’t about romance and passion 24/7. Love is being able to love someone through all the good and bad. You not giving up on your relationship says a lot, why? Because you LOVE them! You wanna be with them. ROCD will cause you to doubt every single little thing, every imperfection, and make you doubt. There is no better person out there, everyone is different and comes with different personalities and traits. There is no such thing as a perfect relationship. You’ve made it this far in your relationship because you know it’s worth it, it will be worth it in the end. I’m sure you feel guilt because he isn’t aware of how you feel and it makes you sad and I’ll tell you one thing that I’ve learned. Communication is key, I told my boyfriend about my rocd and he was so understanding, he knows I love him to death but my intrusive thoughts and overthinking says otherwise. It’s all in your head, it truly is. If you didn’t love him or want to be with him, you wouldn’t be right now, you wouldn’t be stressing so hard about it. Because you know he is your person and you are his. Once you are able to open up about your feelings, it will take your relationship to a whole other level and trust me you will feel better. Stay positive, communicate, and love. I’ll say it again ‼️‼️ROCD is not a death sentence to your relationship‼️‼️
@flowers1530 Thank you sooo much, and I’ve spoken to him about my ROCD, he’s very supportive, and is always there for me 🩷 he’s like that light of hope in my life. Thank u for being so kind, and responding to my comments. I’m also here for you and I know you will prosper in life and OCD will still be there but we are going to be in control of it 🫶🏼
@Anonimo05 Of course girl!❤️ and thank you!!
@pray for me I know this is an old comment but this truly helped pull me out of my head and into my body and beginning to think logically while I was spiraling. THANK YOU!!!
@healingwithhan__ on tik tok has had some helpful advice
Do you experience anxiety? Because i do really bad, i haven’t slept good because of it, i wake up in the middle of the night like something is going to happen, or im going to die, im scared to stay home alone without my grandma because i feel safe with her here, it’s like i feel trapped and cant breathe. Does this happen to anyone, it’s too early to wake up my boyfriend
What do yall do when yall think of past partners or other people during intercourse with your current partner. I ended up confessing that to my partner and it’s damaging the relationship or making things really difficult. Having a really hard time trying to control the thoughts. I even think of other people while with my partner. Any advice or anyone with similar experience?? Please
Can anyone relate to this type of ROCD? It’s like i obsess of my partners past, I’ve spent probably 100 hours over the last 3 years asking him about girls he was with before me questioning him about every little detail and seeking reassurance. I don’t want to think about these girls at all. And I’ve been in ERP since August and was doing really good and not sure if it’s just getting bad again the last few days because of the holiday (Easter) and i had to go to his hometown where I know he had a past in and he recently brought a ring which I’m so excited about but it just seems like it’s getting harder for me and i don’t wanna be talking about girls he dated for a few months before me when we are about to get engaged. Am i ruining my future? What can I do to help and to not bring up stuff about the girls before me? How can I be in the moment and not relate everything to an irrelevant girl before me? Help
Im scared that if I start to think it too much, I will start to believe it, and it becomes my reality. I always have thoughts like, “Do I love him, what if I lose feelings, how longs is this going to last, when will these thoughts finally go away, is he the one for me, is this how love feels like or am I just convincing myself?” I start to search things up to make myself feel better but the longest that works for is a few hours and then that gut wrenching feeling comes back. I love him I’m sure of it, but then why do I feel like this? I know if I didn’t love someone I would let them go and would t even fight for it or try to get better, but for him I’m trying ever second of everyday and sometimes I just feel so hopeless. I can’t afford a therapist and I’m too busy to talk to one. I don’t know what to do or how to feel, sometimes I just feel numb and I hate it, sometimes I feel like crying but can’t, and most the time I don’t feel jealous anymore and that scares me because I’m a jealous person. Then I get thoughts and reminders of my ex. Not in a way that I like them but the hatred and the trauma and pain they left me with. The mental, verbal and physical abuse. Sometimes my current relationship reminds me of him and why I shouldn’t be in one because I always fall into this deep hole that feels impossible to get out of. I just get so scared.
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