I feel like I’ve failed.

I asked for reassurance from the stranger I was having what if thoughts about. I feel crazy. I feel like I’ve failed, I couldn’t handle the unknown. I’ve been fighting so hard for no reason it feels like. I feel kinda gross too. Like asking for reassurance and going through all of this alone.. without my boyfriend knowing anything. He has no idea I struggle so badly. He has no idea of the panic attacks and how hard I’ve been fighting. I wish I could just be freaking normal. I’m 25 and have little to no mental stability when it comes to ocd. I feel like I could break in half at the drop of a needle.

False Memory OCD

Username: Nush.124Nush.124

Date posted: 1y ago

Your not alone! I haven’t told my boyfriend about my ocd as well, I totally understand how your feeling. Remind yourself that your stronger then what you think you are and your not alone at all ❤️ there’s a community here that feel as you do and understands you, even if your not reaching out to your boyfriend your reaching out here, in a safe place and that in itself takes more courage then what u think it does! Be proud yourself, your strong 💪🏻

Username: Justine2734Justine2734

Date posted: 1y ago

So important to talk to a professional my friend. And they should help you open up about it ocd. You can’t live in isolation with this, because THAT is what makes you think you are crazy. No one is bringing you back normalcy

Username: Curtis Devon Curtis Devon

User type: OCD Conqueror

Date posted: 1y ago

You're not crazy

Username: ashocdashocd

Date posted: 1y ago

You’re not alone I’m 26 and this started coming up when I was 23. When it came up at 23 I didn’t want to tell anybody because I was so scared of what they would think and I actually didn’t even understand what was going on and why all of a sudden things flipped. I lived in that state of mind for maybe a year and a half and then it seemed to almost kind of go away and then it came back again when I was 25. This time I decided I needed help. I talk to my boyfriend. Started to see a therapist, started talking to my doctor about what was going on. I started journaling that’s been a big thing for me. Just getting the thoughts out of my head on the paper is almost relief. Let the people closest to you help you by letting them know that you are struggling and that you need support. Days go from decent one day to a train wreck the next. I’ve also been utilizing 988 as that has helped developing a safety plan and they can do grounding exercises to help with the initial panic of overwhelming thoughts. Wish you the best of luck. You’ve survived 100% of your bad days, remember that.

Username: Catperson10

User type: OCD Conqueror

Date posted: 2y ago

Reassurance seeking feels intense

Hi ask in in the middle of an argument with a friend. And I'm having a major urge to seek reassurance. Like chest pain amount is anxiety level. I have failed my ERP today by trying to get reassurance but both people are aware of my OCD and rightly answered may or may not. Anyone have tips on how to get through this? I thought I was on the other side of this but OCD is raring up.

Username: sierraxeliza...

Date posted: 1y ago

Really Struggling

I’m 28 years old and I’ve been battling with OCD since I was around 8 years old. However, I didn’t realize it was OCD until a few years ago. I’ve dealt with multiple themes of OCD that are on constant rotation. Currently, I’m struggling with real event OCD, and moral scrupulously OCD. It has made this past week extremely distressing. My husband is aware of all of my thoughts and feelings, however, that’s due to my need to “confess” virtually everything in my life. He is never stressed about the content of what I’m worrying about, but unfortunately, that serves as temporary reassurance for me, and the cycle continues. This week has been one of my HARDEST. I have been stuck in a loop over the same obsession, with barely any relief. I’m self employed, and usually the winter months are slow, so I currently have no distractions to get out of my head. I can barely eat, and I go through multiple waves of panic attacks a day. I’m starting to lose hope that I can figure this out alone. I’ve never seen professional help for my OCD, and to be honest, it terrifies me to have to explain my thoughts and feelings to a stranger. What if I never get better? I guess I’m just looking for guidance, advice, etc. I’m feeling so lost and scared.

Username: SophiaCalypso

Date posted: 1y ago

Saddness

I feel like OCD ruins so much. My boyfriend broke up with me because of it. It got to a point where I made him do compulsions (ex: open and close the door a certain amount of times). I have OCD in combination with PTSD so I would get triggers often. He got to a point where he got up and left me while I was at work and cut contact completely. I don’t know how to feel and I feel like a failure. It’s been two months and my OCD has been nonstop telling me I was an abuser or narcissistic and that’s why he left. Everyone tells me I’m a broken record… but they don’t know that this is torture for me, too. I wish I could start over with my ex, but I can’t, and that bothers my OCD, too. Lack of control. I also seem to have memory issues in that relationship, I can’t remember what happened or not, and I’m not sure if that’s part of my OCD.

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I feel like I’ve failed.

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