I keep getting intrusive thoughts of men and their privates when i pleasure myself and i hate it so much... plus i have this intrusive urge to smell my hand during and after i pleasure myself, and when i do because i dont want to smell weird, my hocd goes "YOU LIKE THE SMELL OF YOUR HAND AFTER PLEASURING YOURSELF BECAUSE YOU LIKE MENS PRIVATES AND LIQUIDS" when i really dont want to be attracted to men or their privates in any way...
Hey, I hope you are doing okay? I’ve noticed you post on here a lot. I understand that you want to get relief and I myself have been guilty of doing this in high states of panic. What I’ve learnt is posting a lot is a compulsion you want relief of course you do but all it does is feed ocd. It tells your brain that this is really important! Try observing your thoughts as something separate to you! (Easier said than done) and allow yourself to feel the anxiety! What I’ve noticed in the last few days is that if I acknowledge the thoughts, feel the anxiety I tend to forget the contents of the thoughts.
@TBdiz89 Can sexuality change that is what my ocd is telling me that I have changed man wish i could just wake up tomorrow and this all would just leave me alone
@kyle g tucker No one can answer that, only you can define your own sexuality. Some people consider themselves straight even if they’ve experimented with the same gender, my sister in law being one. Her sexuality is hers and hers alone so she is the only one who can define that. The calmer you are, the better you feel! The more you treat them as just intrusive thoughts the more clarity you eventually get. The problem is, is that when we obsess over something and fear it the more evidence we will find to support our intrusive thoughts, you can’t argue with ocd. I’m a long way from being there but you have to treat it like any other thought. ERP as well, expose yourself to your fears without doing a compulsion. Feel that anxiety.
@TBdiz89 Thank you for this I have tried doing exposures tbf I tried to watch two guys kissing and started to gag and also felt very uncomfortable all the while my ocd was like you like this as I am literally about to be sick I really tried to sit with the video but I couldn’t it was making me feel I’ll so the next exposures was way more intense I went on porn doing what I would of normally would of done looking at solo girls but the thought in my head is like you are pretending this thing literally does my head in I don’t have a problem with being gay but I would of thought I would of known when I was younger not 28 and as I said it makes me feel very uncomfortable and wired my body isn’t agreeing with this just want out of this it feel unbearable I feel on edge all the time I want the old me back
@TBdiz89 I was tricked into experimentation by a friend of mine when i was a kid... while i was 14, i was very immature for my age... he said it wasnt a homosexual act when it was, and 30 seconds in i ran to the bathroom cause i hated it... when my hocd came, it brought back those memories and now my hocd is telling me that i wanted the experimentation even though he tricked me by saying it wasnt a homosexual act we were doing...
straight girl suffering from hocd, okay so when i was younger i looked at like a girl corn star insta for like 2 weeks and like did get aroused by it, didn’t think much of it still fancied boys, girls were like ew no to me, but its triggering my hocd so badly, like is it normal that i could look at a sexy pic of a girl n get aroused by it, but like a shirtless pic of a boy i wouldn’t, however i have insane attraction to men irl, i love my boyfriend, i love the idea of being with a man and hate the idea of being with a woman, this really freaking me out!
Last night I was self pleasuring. I didn’t set out to think about anything weird but as I was doing it some pocd thoughts were in my brain. I did not get off to them, but I could have. Idk why that is but it is. Idk what to do and idk why I am this way. Is there some science about the brain while aroused or is it possible that the more gross or taboo something is I can like it?? Idk, just want to know if anyone can relate.
I deal pretty heavily with this. The last couple days, I’ve had what I think are urges. Something pops into my head intrusively and then what stems from that is me WANTING to just indulge in it even though it’s gross. I get worried bc I used to struggle w thoughts about my dad for a long time until eventually I just purposely thought of him while self pleasuring and got off to it. While that’s something I did, it is NOT me. It all stemmed from my mental health declining a couple years back, I was never this way before. So I get worried that it almost happened or might happen with my pocd cuz I could never live with myself if it did.
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