Catlove9

Date posted: 1y

Intrusive urges getting worse 😔

I have horrible harm intrusive urges and they are getting so much worse. It’s feeling like I’m about to act on them and that I’m so close to doing it. It also is starting to feel like I want to do it. I am really doing my best to accept them and not ruminate but I am really struggling and nothing is helping. I am very scared because it feels like I am getting weaker at holding myself back and I want this to just go away. Any advice would be great.

Harm OCD

Hyucklechuckles

User type: OCD Conqueror

Date posted: 1y

When I was in this situation, the thing that helped was to make myself stop thinking or engaging and focus on self care and frivolous activities. My own harm OCD was related to real events and tied to major depression and poor self image. so I spent a lot of time not engaging with the news and focusing on romancing myself 💀 Idk if that’s helpful at all. I’m not in your brain, you know? I just found that, over time, i started to “forget” the problem. I still get this kind of OCD spiral and it’s hands down the worst for me, but I have a strong understanding NOW that I’m not inherently evil or bad, so it’s easier to sit or meditate and let it pass. Not easy, just easier. And I haven’t felt in any real danger of hurting anyone in years.

Catlove9

Date posted: 1y

@Hyucklechuckles This is helpful. I do have a poor self image and I know I need to work on that. I hate having these urges. I should probably stop analyzing why I’m having them as well.

Hyucklechuckles

User type: OCD Conqueror

Date posted: 1y

@Catlove9 I can see this. Real recognizes real. Try to immediately do something else. I started watching cute movies or eating cake or making myself dress nice and walk in the park. Really my goal was to romanticize myself and focus a LOT on self love. Like a LOT😤💙 I needed to learn that I was just an average person and that I didn’t need to be anything other than an average person among average people. Not good. Not bad. Not even something in between. Just a complex human person, no different than other complex human people. When I was at my worst I believed I was a monster and that my loved ones would find out and kill me and I’d disappear like a horror movie. Which …. Honestly was absolutely depression speaking through the OCD. Humanizing myself took years (like literally 2 years) but it was well worth it. Good luck!! 🖤🖤🖤🖤🖤

Catlove9

Date posted: 1y

@Hyucklechuckles This is VERY helpful. I deal with false memory as well and all around I just feel like a monster and I hate it. I am going to try being a little easier on myself. I focus on all my mistakes. I really appreciate your help!

Hyucklechuckles

User type: OCD Conqueror

Date posted: 1y

@Catlove9 OMG IVE BEEN THERE!!! I can’t wait to hear all about your healing journey. Forgive yourself for your mistakes and be kinder to the little kid inside you who needs real love. You’ve GOT this 🖤🖤🖤🖤

Catlove9

Date posted: 1y

@Hyucklechuckles Thank you!

OCDVIC

Date posted: 1y

I feel the same way and i feel like my anxiety is just going all day 😔

OCDVIC

Date posted: 1y

Tbh i think we should just stop analyzing why this is happening. I hate saying this because i feel like i cant but i try but it wont stop.

Catlove9

Date posted: 1y

@OCDVIC I’m so scared. It just feels like it’s going to happen and I don’t have a choice 😔

OCDVIC

Date posted: 1y

Same but ocd makes it feel as real as it can and im going through a lapse and it got worst day by day

Catlove9

Date posted: 1y

@OCDVIC This is where I am too 😭

Andi 🤓☝️

Date posted: 25w

What is this?

Recently ive been getting very scared to even be angry bc of the horrible thoughts I have and it feels even more real when I'm angry or even annoyed. Rn I was not even super annoyed at my neice but I felt a twinge of annoyance since she went up to my face and was yelling at me while I was resting on the bed and I got this image of doing something bad to her and I felt my hand twitch very little. I got nervous and felt relieved when her dad told her to stop screaming for no reason. I've been hyperfocusing on my bodily reactions (mainly my hands or how I'm feeling like did I just enjoy that? Was I considering???) And I've noticed the small twitches whenever I'm mad or annoyed and it's scaring me so bad! Like do I want to act out? Am I holding back??? I used to not even twitch at all when mad and I felt 100% sure I'll never act out but now it feels like I don't know bc what do these twitches mean?, I do know I don't want to ever act out but it's so scary. Recently whenever I feel angry once the argument is over I cry really bad after I'm alone and I pray so i never want or act out. And when the annoyance passes I also feel so guilty and want to stay away. Im scared these are real urges and i research for many many hours to make sure they arent urges or impulses and i also tend to ask chatgpt or here if the anxiety gets so bad 😕

Holl1

Date posted: 24w

Urge?

Earlier I had what felt like an urge but I’m not sure. I’ve had urges before but this felt different as the object was in front of me (not intentional btw) , I’ve been quite stressed lately and my OCD is latching on to that. I had an urge to harm and within that I had like 2/3 intrusive images that came to mind, I couldn’t rationalise with it, I felt “stuck” when I came out of it I felt scared immediately was trying to work out why I’d even think of doing that & was very upset. A while after I keep getting thoughts like “say your goodbyes it won’t be long until you act out” I cried to my boyfriend and told him everything. How do I know if this was intent vs intrusive urge?

Harm OCD

Stacey353

Date posted: 24w

Can’t stop the what if thoughts

What if this and what if that. It’s all harm related and the urges feel so real I just can’t stand this anymore. Does anyone have any advice that has conquered OCD harm intrusive thoughts. I have them 24/7 and they are so scary.

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Intrusive urges getting worse 😔

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