Mental Health and Unemployment Guilt (18+)

Has anyone else gone through a long period of unemployment? I have been unemployed for 4 years now. I quit my job due to mental health stressors, then the pandemic happened, then my mental health got even worse (to the point where just existing day to day can be a huge struggle). My girlfriend has a high income and has been fine with me being unemployed and working on my mental health, but I feel like I’ve taken advantage of that. (Why in earth was I OK with letting her support me in this way for so long?) I feel so ashamed and lazy. I’m applying for jobs now (and struggling due to the huge gap in my employment and my still very poor mental health). I feel like even if I get a job now, I will still feel so consumed by the guilt and shame of being a useless member of society for 4 whole years. I am just so sad and tired and I feel like I’ve messed up severely in every area of life. And I am terrified to go back to work because of how severe my OCD still is. But I feel like such a burden on my gf, and I know things have to change. Has anyone else overcome anything similar? How do you get over the guilt and shame?

cajen83

Date posted: 2y

I feel you. It's a slow, gradual process. I'm 40 and returned to work in an office last year for the first time in 20 years. I had been a private music teacher teaching one-on-one lessons for 20 years (minimal money compared to my husband), which I was great at because I didn't have a boss to report to or other co-workers (my ocd is worse around others), but the pandemic decreased my student load, so I looked for steady employment. I became a tax preparer and worked my first 4-month tax season in the office last year. I never thought I could work in an office again, but I was able to work for 4 straight months. And I am returning again this year and working more hours because I feel I'm ready for more hours. When I feel like I've been a failure or feel guilty for not being able to hold a job (I've quit many jobs), not made enough money or any money, I try and remember I have the rest of my life to progress and move forward. I also tell myself "hey, you've got a mental illness, things are harder for you! give yourself come credit for just managing to stay alive and survive for so long! that is the most important thing of all!" Goof luck, you'll do great. Remember that your worth doesn't reside in anything you do or don't do. you always have worth.

Anonymousrabbit

Date posted: 2y

It’s so difficult but you need to put your health first! I completely get where you’re coming from, I was unemployed for quite a while due to mental health! During the time I was unemployed I was doing therapy which was really useful (I’m still carrying on with it). I still struggle but am pushing through! I know how difficult it must be for you, are you currently doing therapy? Maybe try and set goals for each week (It’s so helpful!) and challenge yourself but don’t push yourself over the edge! Also make sure you try and be honest with your girlfriend as she would want to know how you’re feeling and she might be able to help x

Be a part of the largest OCD Community

Share your thoughts so the Community can respond