I'm feeling so overwhelmed by contamination OCD

Thank you A23, thank you so much for replying to me. I'm very grateful 🙏. I agree with you, I think your answer and opinion it's very good suggestion and I will really try to be able to use the makeup this Sunday. It scares me to death, as over this years I have read and seen so many forensic cases and also I have watched all the episodes from "monsters inside me" and u find biology so interesting, I'm extra paranoid about pretty much everything. But your last question really feels it open my eyes, you're right, it seems for sure more likely there was some problem with the glue on the box rather than some extreme possibility.

And the OCD will be happy...

Hi dear OCD26, thank you so much for your time to read my post and answer to me. I agree with you, that would be the absolute best thing to do, sadly the Rare Beauty makeup, it's sold just online, I have researched and there's no physical store in Sweden that sells the makeup, I wouldn't care to travel 800 km to Stockholm or 1,200 km to Gothenburg to get it there, but sadly it's just online. And I have ordered already 2 times and both boxes had the same issue. It seems pretty possible it's just what it seems to be a problem with the glue, but inside me there's still the intrusive thoughts about: what if someone has deliberately tampered the makeup?

@Estrid I agree with you Estrid, I don't really want to give OCD a win over this too. As it has taken almost all the shapes possible to make my life miserable.

@Estrid Dear Estrid, thanks a lot for your time yo read and answer my post. I appreciate so much. It's good to hear from you. Thank you for encouraging me to use the makeup, as the moment I was reading your reply,I felt so excited about trying it and being brave.l hope that feeling will last so I can be able to use it. You're absolutely right and I really like your wisdom * I will keep on reading this supportive messages and I will try really to be able to use it this weekend. Tack så jättemycket!!

Dear Estrid, thanks a lot for your time yo read and answer my post. I appreciate so much. It's good to hear from you. Thank you for encouraging me to use the makeup, as the moment I was reading your reply, I felt so excited about trying it and being brave. I hope that feeling will last so I can be able to use it. You're absolutely right and I really like your wisdom ✨️ I will keep on reading this supportive messages and I will try really to be able to use it this weekend. Tack så jättemycket!!! 💖✨️🙏

Dear Estrid, thanks a lot for your time yo read and answer my post. I appreciate so much. It's good to hear from you. Thank you for encouraging me to use the makeup, as the moment I was reading your reply,I felt so excited about trying it and being brave.l hope that feeling will last so I can be able to use it. You're absolutely right and I really like your wisdom * I will keep on reading this supportive messages and I will try really to be able to use it this weekend. Tack så jättemycket!!

@XPaulina You are welcome! And remember: try not to rely on the feelings, instead make a firm decision to go against the "what if's" Let reality show you that your thoughts about this are nothing to build your actions on. You are stronger than you know. Your OCD will tell you it will be too hard - don't listen! You can do this!

@Estrid Dear Estrid, thank you so much for all this beautiful, encouraging and supportive words! ❤️ it really means a lot to me! Just want I need. I will really write this words down in notes everywhere st home, to have reminders of this because the OCD has no limits on when to attack me with lots of intrusive thoughts. Today I haven't still achieved to unpack the makeup and even check the box I've been procrastinating a lot, I feel almost I won't be able to do so, I feel like a have lost this battle if I surrender on the OCD about this, it makes me feel like a real failure.

@XPaulina I have had "black belt" in procrastination. My best advice, and what I learned in therapy, is to make the decision beforehand. For example "tomorrow, at 11 o'clock, I'm going to use one of the things I fear" Make it doable by writing it down step by step if needed. You are know failure! If you have OCD: life is hard, you need no condemnation - instead, be kind to yourself, it will help you in recovery! I highly recommend Kimberly Quinlan on the subject of selfcompassion - she has meant so much to me. Social media, pod (your anxiety toolkit) and website CBTschool. And you are right: OCD has no limits! And that's why we have to set limits. Otherwise it will away our life. Take care, be kind and fight the good fight!💪

@Estrid Dear Estrid, thank you so much for your fast response. I'm sorry I answered until now. The OCD takes me the whole day, as it has spread in all the areas of my life, shape-shifting all the time. Thank you so much for all the very nourishing words and help. It means the world to me. You are a truly kind and caring person ❤️. I agree with you I'm also a "black belt" in procrastination. I just searched for Kinberley Quinlan, I wad already finishing with the application for therapy but in the end says it's therapy just for residents in California and Arizona 😭😥😢. I found the pods I will system listening to them right now. Tusen tack för allt kära Estrid! Infinite thank you for providing me with information and support. I have really tried to apply for internet psykiatri You recommended me but I haven't succeeded. It says in the website if I'm not fluent in Swedish I can't apply. Any suggestions on how to get in touch with them? As I live far from Stockholm, in Västerbotten. If I don't hear from you today, I wish you a Happy New Year, for you and all your love ones. Washing you this new year will be full of health, love, peace and joy 😊 💖

@Estrid Hello Estrid, it's good you remembered me! I just listened to 1 podcast it was so good, it was about compassion and OCD. I willisten to some others now also Thank you for providing me the phone number again. I haven't even been able to talk to a person there. Estrid do you think of I make a list with the procedure to follow to unpack and clean the makeup containers, will I still be in time to use them later tonight? I should have done that at least yesterday, but I never thought about it. To think about trying the makeup makes me so scared and anxious! Thank you sc much for your kind wishes!

@XPaulina I'm glad you appreciate Kimberley, I think she is amazing. Only you can answer the q about if you are able to use the make up. Probably your anxiety will rise high. Maybe you can make a plan and do it another day or you can do it tonight. In my experience it does no good to force myself to conquer my fear - better to make a plan and willingly allow the anxiety to rise and fall.

@Estrid Thank you so much Estrid. Yes I have listened now 2 more, about OCD when it collides with PTSD, I was actually diagnosed also with complex PTSD in the begging of this year. It was so good recommendation of yours, if you have more material to share please do, it's gold to me. Yes I agree with you, some things I can't really force myself to do at the same moment, some things I have also need to do so planning, and then even if I feel quite overwhelmed, I try to finish what I have started. I have clra Ed and unpacked another batch of the same makeup I received first, 2 days before Christmas, still I haven't dared to use it or try it. But I have cleaned it with disinfectant more than 1 week ago. Of course that box also looked "opened" less than the last one I just got 2 days ago. But I really would like to try it. But I haven't dared yet.