Whyyocd

Date posted: 1y ago

Feelings

I keep having this reoccurring feeling that I don’t actually believe in god. Sometimes I feel numb towards. I’ve just deal with so much because of religious ocd and I just don’t know what to do anymore. I don’t want this feeling though. And I’m worried it’s real and that it means something. It’s like I worry that I don’t actually believe in god because I’m not freaking out about going to hell anymore. I wish I had my old relationship with Jesus back.

Religion & Spirituality OCD

Lizzie Scheav

Date posted: 1y ago

Hii, I had pocd and hocd, and I can guarantee that having religious OCD is the worst. I cried a lot about this. I felt really bad, especially because my OCD attacked me with inappropriate thoughts. I felt accused. So I got really discouraged. Now I'm partially in disbelief. it's sad 😢

Whyyocd

Date posted: 1y ago

@Lizzie Scheav I’m sorry you went through this! I use to cry like crazy too. And I think part of my intrusive thoughts or maybe even my actual thoughts are because I started to question who god really is. If he even is loving and good and etc :( but I still have hope that I can get back to place where I was. It’s just hard

Ryan Mullen

User type: OCD Conqueror

Date posted: 1y ago

@Lizzie Scheav Are you still struggling?

Lizzie Scheav

Date posted: 1y ago

@Anonymous Yes, I still struggling. But I have so many themes now and after my religious OCD my anxiety got worse. But there is something that at least made me realize something: if I have these thoughts about religion, then obviously everything is OCD. showed me how these thoughts really are OCD 😢

Cammy123

Date posted: 1y ago

I have this exact same theme! It can be very hard and scary! Im currently having a flare up right now and it’s scary! I feel like “is this me?” Or “is this OCD?” Everything in my wants that mountain moving faith and belief! It’s just I feel like I have an accuser in my head telling me otherwise! Sometimes I’ll say “Lord i believe and love you” then sometimes it’s like my OCD will say “No you don’t” it bothers me! A lot! Im trying my best to move forward but it’s hard when OCD literally makes you doubt yourself. I look back and see how my relationship with Jesus was and I miss it! I sometimes get scared will He leave me because of these thoughts? Do these thoughts mean something about me? I fight these thoughts because they FEEL very real sometimes! Like it’s coming from you! I don’t understand why I have doubt because I’ve had experiences and He has changed my heart! There’s NO logical doubt at all! It makes no sense! But that’s the thing with OCD it’ll make you doing literally everything! It hurts because I value God & Jesus and love them but OCD attacks what you love! It attacks your faith! All we can do is pray (not compulsively) and move forward! I have moments were I’m okay! I feel like myself again then moments I’m so deep in a flare up I feel so lost and feel like is this me?!?! Im still learning the tricks of OCD. If you have any advice on how to move forward I would love to hear!

Ryan Mullen

User type: OCD Conqueror

Date posted: 1y ago

Ive had multiple themes as well. Each one I cannot help but think Im am that person now and Im going to carry it out. I am currently struggling with Religious OCD right now for the first time. Im finding it to be the most difficult. As its attacking the thing that makes me me and I love the most. I have hope I will overcome this just like i have all the other ones

Whyyocd

Date posted: 1y ago

@Anonymous I have gotten over them! I have moments where I feel like it’s gonna come back and sometimes my intrusive thoughts are at a high or sometimes they are almost not even there. It’s very up and down but I can definitely say things have gotten better and that I’ve gotten over them. I even feel like I know myself again. I hope that can give you some hope. The one that I still struggle with the most though is religious/existential ocd. It was my first theme and every other theme I had in my opinion was triggered because of this one. But like I said it’s a lot better now. I just have moments where I start feeling like this and then I start questioning if it’s my ocd or actually me and etc

anthonycaronna

Date posted: 1y ago

I have many subtypes of OCD, and I can tell you religious OCD is the worst for me. Constant thoughts around my mind and what I see in life is make me think that they are signs from God. It also makes it hard for me to pursue my goals and desires because I get thoughts thinking that God won’t let it happen or he will get mad if I do. Another thing is that I could get a thought about someone or something and my mind will say it’s the Holy Spirit that’s telling me this and it makes me anxious, angry and sad. It’s very struggling to deal with this

a_lors

Date posted: 1y ago

@anthonycaronna OMG I feel you, that was me not a long time ago. I’ve struggled with many themes too, but struggling with God and the uncertainty of whether it’s my mind or real God’s signs for certain decisions was terribly excruciating 😩

Olive.J

Date posted: 1y ago

@anthonycaronna I feel this too 😣

Olive.J

Date posted: 1y ago

Currently experiencing this theme of OCD and yep it’s been one of the harder ones to deal with. Still trying to find a way to work with it until it passes, but not enjoying the damage I feel it has done to my faith 🫠

Ryan Mullen

User type: OCD Conqueror

Date posted: 1y ago

Have you only had religious OCD?

Whyyocd

Date posted: 1y ago

@Anonymous No I have had multiple themes

Ryan Mullen

User type: OCD Conqueror

Date posted: 1y ago

@Whyyocd Have you been able to get over the other themes?

Ryan Mullen

User type: OCD Conqueror

Date posted: 1y ago

Ive also never had the major depression as bad as this one is giving me.

Whyyocd

Date posted: 1y ago

@Anonymous Yeah religious ocd was my most depressing theme too. ERP helped me a lot with my themes though. I think I just need to build my relationship with Jesus back again because the religious ocd put me through so much

Blumenkohl1

Date posted: 1y ago

This is exactly how I am feeling as well :(

AnonCat227

Date posted: 20w ago

Feeling Distant From God

OCD often makes me feel distant from God. I often feel unforgiven, unloved, and even hated. In my head I often view God as someone who hates me and who is always constantly disappointed in me. My relationship with him feels like an Obligation now more than a relationship. I’m always on the cusp of becoming an atheist, but I always draw myself back because I don’t want to give up my faith so fast, even if it’s been 4-5 years of living like this. I’m often at war with myself daily. There is never a day that I feel as though if I do one small thing whether it be buy something or eat something that I’m going to end up in eternal damnation. And even though I know it’s only OCD and it’s cognitive distortions, I still feel uneasy.

kakeyboo18

Date posted: 11w ago

people with religious ocd

my ocd has really been taking its toll on me lately. i feel completely unloved by God. i use to feel it, but now i just kinda feel a hole. i talk to Him everyday, and read devotionals. i spend time with Him. i just can’t feel Him. i know a relationship with God isn’t based on feelings, but on faith. i guess my faith is running a bit low. i’m just tired and my thoughts get worse. it’s like a roller coaster.

King silly

Date posted: 8w ago

Not seeking reassurance, just prayers

Lately my OCD has been very horrible, it’s been more convincing than ever to the point where I’m genuinely convinced that I like this stuff, when I get a thought, I’ll hear my intrusive thoughts go “oooh, I like that, I’d do that.” and I just don’t freak out nor feel bad, I just feel like I like it even more, and feel like I would do/act on it and like it, and the feeling is strong and it lingers forever? It genuinely feels like I do, and I’m just lying now, i can’t tell if I make these thoughts worse or anything All I remember mostly just being like confused sometimes when these thoughts happen, but since I’m getting strong emotions that I like it, my brain says that means I did and I’m worried about that being true because I don’t understand nor know It’s like I am resisting to like this stuff now, it’s even tougher now than it was before

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