Hi all! First post on this forum. I’m a long time sufferer of OCD and my current rituals focus on STD testing and believing that I’ve had sex with random people who aren’t my husband when I’ve been drinking. I’ve stopped drinking for the time being to avoid the trigger, but how do I stop thinking that the last time I got really drunk, I might have cheated? I know in my heart it’s OCD playing tricks again (seriously I must have done about 30 STI tests in the last few years) but I don’t know how to stop the thoughts or the compulsion to do it again? It’s been weeks and the anxiety isn’t dimming. I would usually just take the test and then.at least get some peace away from the obsessive thought!!

Welcome lovely. The more you test is reassurance and so bad for your ocd my lovely. You will just be fuelling this horrible b*stard. OCD will just latch onto your insecurities. It is such a debilitating disorder and very hard for others to understand but we all do here. Sit with the anxiety no matter how strong it is......let your heartbeat go right up, let your body shake and let your breath go fast but try to not give in to the testing. It will eventually ease. Xx

One thing that helped me was realizing that OCD attacks your values and creates thoughts that are the inverse of how you live your life. From your themes we know that you greatly value and respect your husband and your relationship. You also have fear of harming him involuntarily (emotionally and physically).

How are you going with this rachelraema? Have you managed to resist the compulsion in the last 10 days since your post?

Omg someone else with the same exact obsession as me!!! I have been feeling so fucking alone for four months I am starting to feel so depressed now I started getting obsessed when I had a symptom I googled and I spiralled. I’ve had repeated tests and always find a fault with it “what if I had the wrong results? What if they mixed them up? What if they aren’t accurate? What if I didn’t test at the right time?” My newest obsession is my eye. I had conjunctivitis and now a what the optician said is a chalazion and definitely not std related. My mind tells me “how can you be sure? They haven’t swabbed it...” I’m convinced I will lose my partner as a result of having STDs I didn’t know about and he will leave me. It’s actually ruining me