trigger warning

i’m having a really bad episode rn. i have a very bad theme of not understanding life kind of. right now it’s not understanding the concept of talking. how i don’t really even need to think to respond to something? like i just automatically can say something and it just comes out without having to think about it. it’s making me think this isn’t real and there someone on the outside or something controlling me because i don’t have to think to talk it just happens so someone or something else is just controlling what i say or thinking for me. i’m so deep in this loop hole i feel like i’m going crazy and can’t get out of it. it’s making everything feel fake. idk what to do. i literally cannot understand the concept of speaking and how it works like how do i just talk and it comes to my brain without even thinking about it. it’s happening right now as i type this. how do i even know to say this stuff how is it coming to my head without even thinking about it. idk what to do. this is so scary.

Existential OCD

Username: MCTMCT

User type: OCD Conqueror

Date posted: 48w ago

I’m sorry you’re going through this! I’ve been experiencing some of this the past few days. I was having a lot of bad anxiety and got an “anxiety hangover” which caused some depersonalization/derealization for me. I find that ERP really helps with this though. I realized that my existential questions were just intrusive thoughts and I don’t need to answer them. Googling is a compulsion for me so I know I don’t need to do that either. I’ve been saying to myself, “yeah being a person is weird,” “no one knows the answer,” and “yeah that’s crazy.” I’ve also been just sitting with the anxiety, telling myself that I can feel weird and disconnected and still go through my day. I can think it’s weird to be a person and still go through life. It IS crazy but I do think like any other theme we don’t have to figure it out!

Username: gbgsbgbgsb

Date posted: 48w ago

@MCT thank you omg 😭

Username: FlorenceHanks222FlorenceHank...

Date posted: 48w ago

Hey there, I'm really sorry to hear that you're going through such a tough episode right now with your OCD. It sounds incredibly distressing and overwhelming, especially with the theme of not understanding the concept of talking and feeling like someone or something else is controlling your thoughts and speech. Remember that you're not alone in this and there are others who can relate to your struggles. Have you heard about "unstuck"? It's an AI-powered therapy tool specifically for OCD that has been super helpful for me lately, and I thought it might be worth checking out. Another member on this forum recommended it to me, and I only wish I had found out about it sooner. Hang in there, and I hope you find some relief soon! 🌟💙

Username: gbgsbgbgsb

Date posted: 48w ago

@FlorenceHanks222 thank you so much 😭

Username: gbgsbgbgsb

Date posted: 48w ago

@FlorenceHanks222 how do i find it?

Username: NaomiStarrNaomiStarr

Date posted: 48w ago

@gbgsb - Here's the link: unstuckmyocd.com/try But, it's better to download it on app store or play store. I hope it can help you like how it has helped me!!<333

Username: mummers

Date posted: 5y ago

I just had a moment of big panic because I keep having obsessions about reality and how is it possible that I’m able to perceive it. You know when you say a word out loud way too many times, and it starts losing its meaning and sounds weird? Same thing happens to me with reality. Sometimes it gets so intense, it makes me wanna vomit or feel like I’ll faint. I just don’t understand existence and everything feels so weird. I can’t get over it. This is my worst obsession :(

"Pure" OCD

Username: Ebby7

Date posted: 2y ago

Kind of at my end.

I am adding a trigger warning, but I’ll still be mindful to censor. So I guess I would say I’m in a relapse. I was doing well (I think). I wasn’t having intrusive thoughts and I overcame a really hard theme. So for a few months I was doing pretty okay. My living situation and relationship took a huge hit and I guess I couldn’t handle the pressure idk. Anyway, one day I was trying to sleep and I got this intrusive thought about losing my mind I guess. Not being able to identify anything, speak, ect. Just being a blank mind or something. (I know, doesn’t my one ounce of sense to me either) Anyway, this really scared me, triggered me so badly that one of my old themes that I truly thought I had overcame came back. Not only did it come back, it sent me spiraling ( still am). It feels so much worse this time. And I’m struggling to overcome it. This thought: “how do we understand words?” And then it’s spirals into other thoughts related to this, but I’ll leave it at this. I can’t cope, my mind is hyper fixated on every word, not just mine. I can no longer watch tv comfortably, listen to conversations, or even speak myself. It’s making me feel like “unaliving” myself. I feel extremely alone in this. Like as if I’m the only person in the world to ever think this or struggle with this kind of theme. Getting some feedback would be great, but I won’t hold my breath.

Existential OCD

Username: peachbud

Date posted: 1y ago

i relapsed please help me i’m so lost

i feel like i’m going insane. i just relapsed so hard. i haven’t had this bad of tocd or delusional thinking that i’m trans for years but i feel so stressed and terrified tonight. feels like i made no progress and everything was for nothing. this theme originally happened when. i was in high school and i thought i was freee from it but i’m not. i’m m shaking right now i’m so scared and upset i don’t want to be alive anymore if it means i have to deal with this stuff my brain won’t focus on anything else i’m so scared i can’t function at all my chest hurts i can’t breathe

Be a part of the largest OCD Community

Share your thoughts so the Community can respond

trigger warning

Related posts

Be a part of the largest OCD Community

Be a part of the largest OCD Community