Help

Just now I was thinking of all the times I was at my sisters kindergarten and after proving that I haven’t done anything inappropriate there I suddenly remembered when in November there also was some event there and I had to walk somewhere different to go to the toilet. And now my brain keeps bothering me with the thought „what if you graped sb on the way there and forgot?“ and like, this is abt last November. And I know for 100000% sure I hadn’t. I remember my entire way there, I even remember details abt people being around some water fountain and lighting candles. Like I remember everything. And there were people all around me too. I remember using my phone after using the toilet too. And I remember I was also going for a walk and my brain keeps being like „but what if I graped somebody on the way there?“ and like, I remember almost the entire walk I went on. I also remember seeing two people and an old couple talking and listening to music. It doesn’t make any sense and ik I’d def remember if I had actually graped somebody but my brain won’t leave me alone I just can’t keep false memory ocd up I hate it all so much. Whenever I’m like „I gotta stop thinking abt it, I KNOW I didn’t do anything.“ my brain goes like „but what if I’m risking the change of it being true in the end? And am ignoring it?“ but I KNOWWW it’s not true 😭 But the thought keeps bothering

False Memory OCD

wumbusgeorge69

Date posted: 1y

Sometimes with these types of thoughts you have to stop trying to rationalize. You already know the thought is irrational, so you’re not going to be able to come up with a rational thought that fixes it. No matter how much you try to think of something that will soothe the thought, OCD finds a way around it because it’s not rational. Sometimes you just have to accept that the thought is there because the more bothersome the thought is and the more you try to get rid of it the more it fuels the OCD. Sometimes I respond to the thought by just saying “okay, acknowledged” and I move on.

m1ch3ll3

Date posted: 1y

@wumbusgeorge69 I always respond like this but it doesn’t leave me bc it keeps saying „but what if I did that and forgot it?“ and like by now this image of me doing that is nested into my brain even though I can’t remember doing this at all and I know that it didn’t happen but now I’m stuck with this :/ so I then always have to go back to ruminating and Being like „but I know I didn’t remember this earlier so it’s def false, I would remember if I had done that“ but then those images are back and they’re messing up my actual memories :( Now I feel terrible

A23

Date posted: 1y

"Maybe I did, maybe I didn't- too many what ifs for me to process rn so you'll have to learn on your own OCD"

m1ch3ll3

Date posted: 1y

@A23 I know that this is what u usually have to respond with but I seriously feel too bad bc I don’t want to „maybe be a grapist“ you know :/ Like I know that I didn’t do this bc I’d remember it and I never even met any person I could’ve done this to and I’m pretty weak so nothing makes sense but I keep being like „but what if I did that and forgot” and no matter how often I tell my brain to just be quiet it won’t be quiet

A23

Date posted: 1y

@m1ch3ll3 Can you maybe try the NOCD SOS button? Hopefully it helps

A23

Date posted: 1y

@m1ch3ll3 Other than that, try not to fight the OCD too much as it punches back a bit

dee012

Date posted: 25w

False memory ocd Help Please

Any advice? I just got triggered by false memory OCD. There is no indicator or memory of me doing anything bad, only the what if. So how can I deal with uncertainty because if I did do the false memory it would go against my morals?? Not something extremely unforgivable just like not ideal and against my morals… I don’t know if it happened. I have no memory of my false memory happen only the “what if” which is enough to scare me FOR CONTEXT: I was in the mental hospital when I was 16, and made a few friends. Some just a grade below me, so 14-15. I remember bringing up in convo someone I met previously at the mental hospital earlier in that year a different time I was hospitalized , to which a boy responded he knew her, and they did (seggsual) stuff at their school. The girl I was talking about at that time was 14. So im assuming the boy was 14 as well. 13 and up is together in the hospital, so he couldn’t be younger than 13. I have no memories of him flirting with me or me flirting with him. Or anything bad happening. Literally just “what if”.. or what if he wasn’t 14 but 13 and u said something inappropriate or flirted with him. I will never be able to know what happened and I’m sick thinking about this. 13 and 16 is NOT WITHIN MY MORALS. I am worried because the only inappropriate I guess convo had is when he was telling me what happened between him and that girl I knew. I also remember him having a bulge down there and it freaked me out and made me feel weird at the time because I noticed it. (At this time I was already diagnosed with OCD and experienced POCD) I try to tell myself maybe maybe not. But the what if it did happen makes me feel like a p33do, and me thinking it didn’t happen doesn’t satisfy me because I don’t have 100 percent certainty

Anonymous

Date posted: 24w

I can’t figure it out

I have a bunch of real event/false memory and there is one that I remember I got in the middle of a horrible episode and I believed it was false but now I can’t remember why I thought it was false and now believe it could be real and it’s just bothering me so much because I want to remember the details to why I believed it was false in the first place and I’m just in a horrible spot and feel disgusting and am getting intrusive thoughts on my themes when I try to check if they are intrusive or not and I can’t function like i don’t wanna be around anyone because all I want to do is confess but I can’t because then I’ll obsess on confessing and they won’t understand.

dee012

Date posted: 24w

false memory ocd :(

TW// MENTION OF DR8GS, SXUAL CONTENT false memory ocd is targeting my earlier teen years, around 16, I had a friend and we both did droogs (spelled it like that for a reason) one time together. I was scared to do the other stuff we had so she did it. but I remember us like touching eachothers chest as like girl stuff I guess idk it was weird lol… like about our sizes but then later on I had asked her smthng about ohh “would u ever wanna do stuff? or would u feel like that’s weird” something along those lines… and I remember her saying “ohhh I mean idk I would but I wouldn’t want it to make things weird between us”.. now here’s my thing. I remember just agreeing and accepting it and moving on, but obviously feeling weird cus that was sortve rejection. But my brain is saying what if u kept asking? Or questioned her? (We never did anything but likeee my ocd is like what if u tried to push it) and my brain is like what if u wanted to do it just bc she was under influence? I wanted us both to do it while under influence 1. Because we wouldn’t be anxious 2. I thought it would be fun at the time 3. I felt like it would be less weird if we were high. I did not PLAN for us to do these substances just for this reason but it was in my head that maybe we would do stuff if we had a sleepover or something plus I had just gotten out of a relationship with a guy and I also like girls. All im thinking is what if she said yes? MY high wore off before hers and hers was lasting longer so she would’ve been under the influence and that would’ve been super bad I would’ve felt like I 🍇 her or something… that’s why im scared right now. Idk if these what ifs are true and I literally am sick with uncertainty. If it’s true that would make me feel so terrible, like a predator (like I tried to coerce her or something) but idk what’s true and what’s not. I just remember this false memory being triggered by the fact that I asked when we were on stuff but my stuff had already wore off is what’s bothering me. (We took different things) I remember worrying about this false memory before, and was able to move on. Also me and that girl were friends for a couple years after that until we fell out over stupidity. And we also had sleepovers after that and idk if I already asked her for reassurance like ohhh are u sure I didn’t make u uncomfortable.. but idk if I did. I want to ask but I can’t because I guess she is not around right now. Like MIA.(her own personal stuff im assuming) Any advice would help :(

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