Pocd

For real I thought it was weird that she wanted me to watch it I'm just gonna look at pictures of kids and listen to their voices

@Hambam I wish you the best , everyone has them own ways of recovering something that works for me could not work for you. But remember that a bad person / pedophile etc never feel bad about them thoughts,acts. I just let the thoughts be and I never even remembered about them till this day when saw your post. I'm not triggered though dw. Just my way to say that it will get better for you.

@Kate Moore - Yeah I completely understand :) It was a super hard exposure for me to sit through. If an exposure is too high, you should try to conquer lower level exposures first. On the other hand, you don't have to do anything you feel way too uncomfortable with doing. I will also say, you're allowed to watch exposure videos without agreeing with what was said in them. Many exposure videos I watch make me feel uncomfortable because I don't agree with commentary/actions in them but exposures are supposed to be triggering. But I would wonder- are you maybe not watching the exposures because of your Ocd- compulsions like avoidance or fears about emotional contamination? Or do you genuinely don't want to watch them for moral reasons outside of your Ocd?- Maybe speak to your therapist about that. If its your Ocd telling you not to watch the exposures- I would watch them anyways

@Anonymous - And FYI no big pressure for you to figure out if it's Ocd or you because ocd always gives us uncertainties/ unanswerable questions. It's just something to be aware of, briefly :)