Feeling like a failure at 23 due to mental health struggles and pressure.

Feeling tired..

I feel like the only 23 year old who’s failing. Like, everyone I know my age is working or going to school, and neither I’ve been able to do for the last 3 years because of my mental health, and a fear of trying and failing. I tried college and it didn’t work out, I tried working and it didn’t work out, so I’ve been trying to focus on my mental health and getting stronger before trying again but now I’m at the point I feel like I’m doomed to never accomplish anything ever again. Every day when I’m doing my household chores or running errands, or doing literally any productive thing, my brain yells the whole time “you’re not doing this task good enough” and “you can’t even do this right, imagine trying to hold a job?” And when I do a task and feel accomplished for a moment, my brain says “your friends are doing way more than this at their jobs, you shouldn’t be proud at all”. I’m so scared my entire life is going to be this hard, even though I’ve made strides in my mental health journey, it still never feels good enough. It’s still so hard and I’m still so scared I’m doomed to never accomplish anything

"Pure" OCD

Username: Emily_1224Emily_1224

Date posted: 35w ago

I'm 23 too, and I struggle with not feeling good enough. Take heart! You are not alone!

Username: UphamiaUphamia

Date posted: 35w ago

@Emily_1224 It’s comforting to know you understand this feeling, sending you love!! 💕

Username: SpecklesSpeckles

User type: OCD Conqueror

Date posted: 35w ago

I'm 56 and have struggled this for years. I'll tell you that you.... are your worse critic. You have plenty of time to accomplish things. I have to go back to the work force soon and have no idea what to do, so time is on your side! Don't fret. It'll work out ☺

Username: UphamiaUphamia

Date posted: 35w ago

@Speckles Having the perspective of someone who’s older is really helpful, thank you for the kind words! I hope your next chapter in going back to work is a great one for you 🥰

Username: AnonymousrabbitAnonymousrabbit

Date posted: 35w ago

Im 24 and have been in the same situation.. when I was 15 - 22 I was hospitalised many times due to ocd and an ed, I have since struggled but have managed to get better slowly thanks to the help of emdr and hypnotherapy! I’ve found not going on social media helpful as I then don’t compare myself to others, I also set weekly and monthly goals for myself which has been helpful - Maybe you could give those a go? Also you shouldn’t compare yourself to others - ‘a flower doesn’t think of competing to the flower next to it - it just blooms’ xx

Username: UphamiaUphamia

Date posted: 35w ago

@Anonymousrabbit I love that quote, and I’m so glad you’re still here and doing better 💕 I’ve always panicked about setting goals because I have the fear of disappointing myself if I don’t reach them, but I’m gonna try to start small with goals and work my way up so I don’t get too overwhelmed too quickly! Also I’ve never really looked into emdr or hypnotherapy but I’m curious to try that, I didn’t realize it could be helpful for ocd!

Username: AnonymousrabbitAnonymousrabbit

Date posted: 35w ago

@Uphamia I know what you mean about the panic and not being able to complete the goals but I make sure the goals I set are achievable, that way I have something to work towards but I know I can do it! I love how you’re going to work your way up, I think that’s the best idea! If I don’t complete the goal I remind myself it’s not about reaching the end goal immediately it’s about the stepping stones/ process I take to complete the goal! I really recommend them both, I had to pay privately (I’m from the UK) but it’s worth looking into xx

Username: makclawmakclaw

Date posted: 35w ago

I’m 23 too and I feel the exact same. College felt like an impossible battle every single day and so does working. I keep feeling like I have a purpose but I’m wasting my life trying to aim for perfection or nothing . It’s exhausting, But We have to give ourselves grace. We are young and it’s our first time being alive. I think it’s okay to not have anything figured out yet

Username: UphamiaUphamia

Date posted: 35w ago

@makclaw I’m proud of you for still pushing through though even when it’s really hard, and I can totally relate to that perfectionism feeling, I struggle to attempt tasks because it’s somehow better to not do it than try and have my brain tell me it’s not good enough the whole time 🙄 but you’re right, we deserve to give ourselves grace and time to figure it all out, thank you ❤️

Username: Jordean

Date posted: 4y ago

WHY CAN’T I BE NORMAL AND GO TO WORK LIKE EVERY OTHER FUCKING PERSON. What is wrong with me. What the fuck is wrong with me. Wow, I feel like such a fucking failure. I don’t understand. My family is so disappointed in me I can just feel it and this is the first time they haven’t given me shit about not working. The silence is deafening. My head is spinning. My family is disappointed in me, my mom is definitely pissed and my dad doesn’t understand mental health and probably sees me as weak and pathetic. Every time I think about work I start shaking. I haven’t worked since the summer because of college but it just made this all worse. I don’t know everything about how to get back to work or what is going on at work so I sent one email to the wrong (probably) supervisor and that was it. God I’m so dead. I need a car because the one I use now belongs to my parents and they’re taking it for my brother and I don’t have the money to pay for a car and I don’t know what I’m going to do. What am I going to do. I’m going to force myself into unemployment and everyone will think I’m pathetic and lazy and i don’t understand why I’d rather cut myself a hundred times than go to work because all I want is to make my family proud of me. I’m just failing. I can’t do it. My brother talks about how he’d “do anything for money” and I just CAN’T and I feel so helpless like he has this advantage over me and I just can’t do anything. I’m so scared I’ll get to work and mess something up and my bosses will scream at me. I’m so scared of being the reason everything goes wrong. I don’t want to be yelled at by customers or my boss and it doesn’t make sense but I can’t pick up the phone to call anyone because if I do bad things will happen and people will yell. I don’t know what to do I feel like my life is spiraling out of control and I just feel like I need to say I’m sorry to my family and to god over and over and over because I can’t take care of myself and it’s affecting the people I love and I don’t want it to.

Username: Makki23

Date posted: 4y ago

I feel like I'm failing at life. The friends I do have left are already living their lives, going to college, getting good jobs. All I do is sit at home overthink constantly horrible things. I have a hard time suriving working at a small retail job. And I don't really have any passion for a career. I wish more than anything I thought normally so I could have a decent t least life....why did I have to be like this? I'm sorry for the random rant

Username: ginaa

Date posted: 4y ago

Does anyone feel like they’re wasting their life away with mental illness? It depresses me so much everyday. My mental health has ruined my life since I was 15 and now I’m approaching 24 and am still in the same place- actually worse. I feel like when I get my life together I’ll be 28 and all my good years would’ve passed. It just makes me so sad 😔

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Feeling like a failure at 23 due to mental health struggles and pressure.

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