i feel like i’ve been losing feelings for my girlfriend even though i love her very much deep down the only sign that this might be ocd is that i gain feelings in the morning, lose them during the day and gain them back in the evening what does this mean
In a healthy relationship you don't feel attracted 24/7. Some part of attraction is also excitement and lust. In a normal relationship you don't feel that all the time. For a good relationship (in my opinion) you need attraction in general but more important you need to get along with that person well. Resonate well on points in life that are important to you. I find my partner very attractive in general. Still he can walk around naked or charm me sometimes and i am still not attracted. Maybe even annoyed. Thats normal. I still know, he is a kind of person, that I find attractive AND can see my life with. And if you are still in school, maybe your goal is to have someone to have good times and fun with. To share thoughts. To talk to, to liste, to be heard. So, you don't need to define your relationship only on attraction.
What's different in the morning and evening compared to the day?
@Wolfram i feel like i love her really much and would never leave her and want to hold her in my arms 24/7, during the day i feel like meh and because i don’t feel anything i should break up w her (causes a fuckton of anxiety)
@ocdposting But what are you doing during the day? I mean stuff like work. What's different compared to the mornings and evenings
@Wolfram in the morning i usually wake up (and have literally no intrusive thoughts for 5 minutes, best time of my life) during the day i go to school in the evening i usually do nothing lol would like to point out that this cycle is very common in my actual ocd things, like whenever i had really bad suicidal and schizophrenia ocd, it always followed this cycle
@ocdposting So is it when you're at school you feel this way about her
@Wolfram in general during the day. i don’t know how to explain this but between 9am-8pm i feel meh and aftee 8pm i feel the spark again
@ocdposting OK. Does school or your average day make you feel stressed on any level?
@Wolfram no, school is easy af, idk why tf this happens, genuinely but again this always used to happen with other ocd subtypes to idek
@ocdposting OK so maybe not stress. Do you see her at school ?
@Wolfram i do
@ocdposting OK I'm at a loss here. Sorry. Maybe it's just intrusive thoughts that has led to convincing your emotions you feel that way?
@Wolfram i think that might be the case? idek thh
@ocdposting If it is, then you'd need to learn how to deal with intrusive thoughts and then possibly do some erp for the emotions
What are the feelings your having?
Do you not trust her, not attracted to her,,,what is it?
@Karate321 not attracted
I don’t think it’s meant to be
You should be attracted to her 24/7
@Karate321 @Karate321 But he has OCD. OCD makes its own rules. Don’t tell him he should be attracted 24/7 when he has OCD which can cause (un-)attraction🫡🙏🙏
@elliss2 ❤️
@Karate321 I didn’t mean this against you, please don’t feel offended @Karate321
I recommend the website Conscious Transitions. She talks a lot about how our perceptions about love and relationships are driven by the unrealistic model that is shown in Hollywood and Disney. Love isn't perfect and you're not always going to feel 100% attraction and love and feelings all the time. Yes of course it's important to have at least a moderate degree of interest and attraction in your partner as a base, but this can fluctuate a lot throughout the course of any relationship, no matter the length. Its a lengthy topic so I recommend checking out that website. She has tons of great content that will settle your mind....just don't keep re-reading for reassurance...😉
something that really bugs me and gets in my head with my rocd is that for most of my relationship i’ve had this nagging anxiety and ocd about it. i can accept my thoughts for the most part, but have this underlying fear that this one could really mean something and that makes me feel guilty! i don’t want to loose her but my mind tells me i do because ive had these thoughts. it’s even coming up in my dreams now! i had a dream last night that i cheated and it made me panic all today and feel so bad and this thought came up again! any advice?
I’ve been struggling with relationship OCD and differentiating between what is an intrusive thought and what is a real doubt. I was really happy with my partner then I got one aggressive thought that I didn’t love him and this spiralled into noticing all his flaws. I struggle being around him because I feel a huge sense of guilt that these thoughts even come into my head and I cannot figure out if this is my brain lying to me or this is how I feel. It’s really impacting a relationship that is so important to me.
i couldn't take this anymore. maybe i'll just let ocd win this time. it's too hard to not have a clear conscience everytime i'm with my bf cuz my mind is telling me i'm unfaithful and don't deserve to be happy. i feel like i'll never get better anymore. i already told myself many times to stop attracting attention from other people especially to people i'm having false attraction to. but i did it again yesterday, right after i smiled a little extra in front of that girl i might be attracted to i could feel the massive anxiety in my chest. already decided last week that i might be actually attracted to her so it's best to fully avoid her. i avoided her with the best i could, but we're in the same classroom and i saw her in my peripheral vision looking at us (my bf and i) whispered to myself not to make any mistake i'll regret, but then i felt like i lose control and laugh a little extra. i searched micro cheating and it says there "trying to impress someone you're attracted to" and now i want to break up with my bf. the guilt is too strong. i couldn't sleep at night.
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