Sexual intrusive thoughts

I am clean and free from my porn addiction. I was 8 and now I'm 18. I didn't realize it was an addiction until now and all the shame is hitting me at once. I let my porn addiction take me to dark and sketchy places. Now I can't get over the shame of the actions I did. I was shameful before but now I accepted that it was an addiction, ive been so depressed and having thoughts about what I did and if I could go back and save myself now I would. I keep getting so many intrusive sexual thoughts about literally everything. People, places, things, animals and even children. I hate all these anxiety inducing painful thoughts. Does anyone have any insight on recovering from excessive thoughts?

Username: ocdnoononiocdnoononi

Date posted: 36w ago

I think exposure at such a young age played a role in this all. Porn can really mess a person up, and for me make it even worse. I was traumatized as a young child and used porn as an escape in many cases- so much so I introduced myself into 18+ spaces while being an underage teen. Pocd just traumatized me even more. Now I’m at your stage where my brain is infected with ocd making me out to seem like an insatiable monster seeking sex in everything. The truth is that since I fear it, and feel wildly uncomfortable by it that it means it’s important to me to NOT do those things. Ocd latches onto things you care about. I care about the safety of people and don’t wish them to be harmed by me or others- so ocd maliciously attacks that and makes me out to look like the attacker when I haven’t even lifted a finger. It’s trying to make everything you do and don’t do as wayyyy worse then they probably are.

Username: SimplerTimes SimplerTimes

Date posted: 36w ago

The tremendous amount of shame and doubt that comes from OCD can feel unbearable at times. We feel guilt because we learned from our experiences and want to grow. But OCD adds a layer of doubt and anything taboo, like sexual topics, is an easy target for it. We have no control over our thoughts, but the key is how we react to them. That is when they lose power. I urge you to seek out an OCD therapist if you haven’t already. The treatment is much different as logic doesn’t work here. But also remember to speak kindly to yourself, the same way you’d speak to a loved one if they told you what you just posted. I truly believe you can do this, don’t lose hope!!

Username: MJocd

Date posted: 5y ago

Please reply. I am embarrassed to share this. I dont watch porn AT ALL anymore and never will again but I keep getting intrusive images of porn scenes I saw on pornsites from a long time ago. Especially weird things, like I remember I once stumbled across porn that had a old man in it. Porn has lots of weird categories. I keep feeling bad and guilty for ever watching porn in the first place but I'm trying to remember a lot of people have watched porn/do watch it without feeling the shame I feel now, over a year after stopping watching it. My OCD is fixating on this to the point where it's making me want to throw up. I have real event/moral ocd and my ocd really tries to make me feel bad about these memories from a long time ago.

Username: Sero82

Date posted: 1y ago

Horrible Sexually Intrusive Thoughts

Sometimes, there are pop ups in my mind of sexually intrusive thoughts and feelings of strong urges of acting out on severely inappropriate things, and it makes me terrified. I feel like a predator honestly, with intrusive thoughts that make me severely anxious, distressed, and uncomfortable. I do not agree with these thoughts, I do not want them, I hate them. I don't know how to stop them. I don't know how I even got them, but they make me feel like a bad person. The urges make me feel like I'd genuinely act on them, but I'd do anything to stop myself from that, anything. I don't know how to make them stop, and I don't know what this signifies of me as a person. The feelings and strength behind them feel so real and so strong, it's difficult to convince myself otherwise. And, oh my god, being able to visualize things in your mind is a quality I wish I did not have. Seriously, it's horrible. I don't want to see images of what I'm getting a sudden intrusive urge to do, and I try to shove it out of my head and it doesn't work. I feel like there are some components that I grew up with that made me learn of things of a sexual nature at a young age that could have made me into a hypersexualized individual, and the discomfort I feel surrounding that (which I am committed to resolving and unpacking) is fueling these intrusive thoughts and makes me feel like they are real because of the fact that I am dealing with a problem of hypersexuality and issues surrounding arousal. Typing this all on here is also distressful because nothing online ever goes away and it makes me anxious thinking of someone linking this to me one day, but I understand it's a public forum to discuss OCD-related issues and so I hope everyone here is kind about that and undissmissive because I'm just looking for some help from this nightmare. Thank you.

Username: Jay947

Date posted: 1y ago

anyone else?

i stuggled with adult content/p0rn from ages 11-18 im 19 now and i stopped but now that i have ocd my brain keeps giving me intrusive thoughts abt sexual acts like in p0rn and it's worse bc i have pocd, so they make me have really awful sexual thoughts that i don't want, anyone else here having this issue?, they all stem from p0rn it's awful. i wish i wasn't exposed to that stuff now. I regret it so bad bc it's ruined my brain and makes my ocd so much worse

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Sexual intrusive thoughts

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