Why is it when I wake up, the first words that go through my head are "I'm a les..."? Followed by scenarios, and then a guy I like. (I'm a girl) It's like with all the ruminating I've done it's convinced me. A long time ago I heard that the first thing that goes through your mind in the morning is what you want. I don't what that.
My ocd is also the worst when I wake up in the morning. Some times like to today it wakes me up hours early. Whoever told you that what’s on your mind in the morning is what you want ,Clearly did not have a ocd.
@Brooke cookie Even people who don’t have OCD do not have their most deepest thoughts right when they wake up like your brain is turning on whoever told you that did not think through what they were saying at all. this is just a symptom of your OCD making you where worry you secretly want something. OCD is a anxiety/fear disorder, so what is happening is you experienced a thought that causes you do be exciting in fear and then you want to have your compulsion or panic attack because of it that’s literally what OCD is. OCD thoughts can be stressful and it does make you wanna start ruminating about them, but they get relief from them. We need to not do that. I need to just let them exist not fight or try to convince yourself anything just let them go. I highly recommend you look up exposure therapy /  response you can do it yourself or with a therapist whatever you wanna do .I’ve been trying it and it is really unenjoyable, but I feel like it is helping me slowly get over my OCD.
@Brooke cookie I don't know where to go for ERP. I'm outside of the US for NOCD. It's so hard to let go because it's as if researching has given me all the mixed signals, all because I don't respond to the opposite sex the way other women do or seem to, based on everything I've read etc. That I don't drool or fawn or stop in my tracks or get tingles most of the time. And yet I've always crushed on guys, never imagined anything but sex and relationships with a guy. And now I also suffer with groinal responses with women (and kids), but don't with guys. So I don't understand what's going on. I only ever imagine or want sex and relationships with guys. It's messed my life up, it really has.
@Jomitzy I should say I don't always get groinal responses to guys, only when I'm in the mood. I also put up mental blocks with guys because I'm so socially awkward and lack self esteem. Constantly checking.
@Jomitzy It’s OK no one’s in the mood all the time.  I also feel you being socially awkward and the low self-esteem. It’s OK.
@Jomitzy I have the same problem I am from south africa and nocd is to expensive so nathan perterson has a self directed online master your ocd course I took it it's good it cause last time I saw it was 297 dollars hope this helps
You have not yet found i guy that makes you feel that way. I haven’t found the man of my dreams either. I wanna get married and have kids someday but none of the guys I know of right now are making me feel that way either. It’s OK you’ll find someone that makes you happy eventually just keep trying. The ones of women and kids is just your ocd. When you have these thoughts and you want to ruminate about them don’t , I know it’s hard but try to Just kind of let them come in and come out and be like OK I have this anxiety doesn’t matter. I’m just gonna keep doing whatever. I am going to keep doing whatever I wanted to do that’s what I have to do when I’m in public and I’m having my intense thoughts.
@Brooke cookie Like for example if I’m having these thoughts while at the grocery store, I’ll be like no I am going to continue buying my groceries. I’m not doing this.
Anyone else with HOCD get thoughts of like "people in denial try to distract themselves" or anything along those lines when just trying to move on from the thoughts. Having a pretty bad episode this morning at least anxiety wise.
This morning I woke up and the first thing I had was a sex scene, ocd topic, of course, and a feeling of some urge, as if I was being driven by adrenaline and it really turned me on...it lasted a short time, I didn't analyze it much. As soon as I woke up, I was left with the feeling that it was real... anyone else?
Help! My OCD has caught onto this thought for awhile and I keep spinning on it. I know you are supposed to follow your values and what your actions suggest with OCD, but what if that is even blurry right know? For example my whole life I wanted to be with a man, and now my OCD is having major intrusive thoughts about women. How do you tell if those thoughts are wanted or not? I can’t figure out if I like the thoughts or not. I’m trying to live the life “I want” but what if I don’t know what that is?
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