Any body here with transgender ocd that evolved from from hocd, and now they are intertwined. Is really amazing how our brains works, my brain went from hocd to harm ocd to pedohile ocd to relationships ocd and now transgender ocd. And the heart of the matter is that I don’t care what it is no more, fuck reassurance and I’m not going to play ocd games anymore, if it says I’m a woman or female, I guess I might be or might not. Honestly, half of the time I’m happy that I’m unsure about my gender andthe anxiety swells up. That way I can let thought be and see the whole picture of thoughts even if they were true. I honestly don’t know if they are true or not but I will live with it and live according to my values. Btw I was triggered while I wrote, I hope I stay triggered ?????.

Hey guys. Trigger warning Soooo I had sexual orientation ocd where I was worried I was truly a lesbian. Now that obsession has stopped bothering me and I’ve come to the conclusion that I’m bisexual! Totally okay with that except now my ocd is telling me that the only reason why I think I’m bi is because this obsession has convinced me I’m bi! Woohoo what fucking hell! Yeah, and now I’m suffering from pocd. And since my sexual orientation ocd kinda sorta had some truth to it, I’m terrified all my other obsessions do too! I don’t want reassurance. I just want to know if anyone has any similar experiences to this and how you dealt with it. The anxiety is making me lose sleep and is burying me in my depression.

HOCD, ROCD and TOCD . . . So my OCD recently all began with ROCD, I felt guilty all the time with my boyfriend, I wanted to stay with him so bad and I love him so much but my anxiety kept telling me to leave and that something wasn't right, that I'm going to be alone forever. Then my HOCD came up, "something doesn't seem right, what if you're actually gay?" and I struggled with this for about 2-3 months. After accepting that even if I am gay, I'm staying with my boyfriend.. The theme of being a transgender came up. That was the absolute worst of them all. It was at a time my anxiety was at its Peak so I was feeling disassociated and my mind just tried to explain that feeling as "you're in the wrong body". I was thoroughly convinced I was a man in a girls body for a solid 3 weeks, I woke up and that was the first thing on my mind "your a man and now youre going to lose your boyfriend, your life and everything that makes you, you." I didn't want to be a man, but my mind was saying "too bad, you are". I eventually went to therapy for this feeling, (they didn't diagnose me with OCD so they weren't treating me as an OCD patient) the thoughts eventually went away but now I'm back on my HOCD. Ive now thorougly convinced myself that I'm gay and will be with a woman for the rest of my life. I don't want to be and this thought scares me. I want to be with my boyfriend, not a woman. But my mind is saying "too bad, just accept that your a lesbian, you're in denial, just come out" but I don't want to be a lesbian ? can anyone relate to the feeling of convincing yourself to the point where you believe it?

I find it really hard to accept the uncertainty of the thoughts. I mean i used to have HOCD and accepting the possiblility that i might be gay was really stressing, but i manage to control it and now i don't have uncertainty with that. I have a boyfriend now but i think i would be with a girl too. The problem is with this other obsesion, fear about being Trans, TOCD? I find it a lot more difficult to accept the uncertainty. Cause it's like okay it's not my sexuality, it's my identity, i have to change who i am, my gender? And not being certain about that scares me a lot. Im really tired of asking myself so do you identify as a man or a woman? It's hard to stop rumiaiting cause it's all in my head. My question is how do you accept the uncertainty of not knowing and being okay with it? Do you have any tips?