plsss help

so i am currently in a new and much better relationship than my last toxic relationship. anyways i was just thinking and having thoughts about how i planned a future with my ex and it didn’t work out and got a little sad and i think a little scared of things not working out with my current bf. i also think part of my thought process was feeling like i don’t deserve my current bf but im not fully sure. after having these thoughts of oh it didnt work out with your ex and you planned all this and had a thought of well anything can happen but i seriously see a future with my current bf. i have a fear the reason i thought “well anything can happen” was because i am holding onto hope my ex is coming back. which isn’t even the case im much happier now and just beating myself up for this thought i had. it wasn’t intrusive and i know that that’s what i meant when i had that thought. it just makes me think i think i want him back or something idek im scared bc my current bf is amazing and i feel terrible.

Relationship OCD

Username: bdads27bdads27

User type: OCD Conqueror

Date posted: 24w ago

this is normal, i went through this too. we literally are shifting perspective about someone who we once shared life with into something past and that’s hard. there memories, love, hardship etc etc. take it with a grain of salt, look at uncertainty and wrap your head around it especially for rocd then erp it up! you got this!

Username: carlamanateecarlamanatee

Date posted: 24w ago

I'm Just in your same situation ❤️ i think that our disorder makes us think that we want something only because of our thoughts... But many times it's because we have a lot of trauma thinking about our past relationship ( that also contributed to low our standards and believe that we don't deserve a healthy relationship) . Just continue enjoying your new Life , you Need time and compassion , lot of support

Username: DavidSeekerDavidSeeker

Date posted: 24w ago

I know this is not what you want to hear…but I think with OCD we have to learn to accept the uncertainty…nothing is certain. We have to learn to live with these thoughts & not know. It’s hard. I’m still trying to figure out how to do this too.

Username: DakotaRose

Date posted: 6y ago

does anyone else get obsessive thoughts about their ex while they’re with their current partner? i was in an emotionally abusive relationship for almost 4 years (also my first relationship EVER) and i definitely have PTSD from a lot of it. he broke up with me and i’m so glad that he did, because i don’t know how much longer i would have continued to be in that relationship. the thing is, even though he’s done a lot of fucked up things to me, i don’t have hate for him in my heart. i have these thoughts like “oh if you don’t hate him you must still be in love with him” and they make me panic. i’ve been dating my current boyfriend for almost 2 years. i love him so much, he’s so supportive of me and great. i get these awful thoughts that my ex was “the one” for me, i will never feel the way i did about my ex with my current boyfriend, constantly comparing them, etc. i’ve been to therapy for years now, and have come to the realization that i am self-sabotaging. i’m lost, depressed, and scared. any advice would be appreciated ❤️

Username: Nl123ehe

Date posted: 1y ago

Relationship Issues

I’m in a relationship, 8 months now, and my narcissistic (diagnosed) ex and I had broken up about 6 months prior. We would sometimes drunk call each other but that’s about it. Anyhow, my current boyfriend is everything I could ask for. He treats me better than my ex ever could and I love everything about him. I randomly got a feeling about my ex the other day and hyper-fixated on it. I know continue questioning if I still have feelings for my ex even though I know I don’t at all and want nothing more than my current boyfriend. I don’t want reassurance because I know that won’t help, I just want to know if anyone else has ever had this OCD obsession of convincing themselves they want a toxic ex or just an ex back while with someone else? Most of my OCD obsessions are so obnoxious I’d know they couldn’t be true, but this one, while still obnoxious, isn’t as crazy as the others but it hurts 10 times more.

Relationship OCD

Username: nova_

Date posted: 1y ago

Help me :(

Today it feels real. I have my online boyfriend my current boyfriend who is perfect and right for me that I want to meet and marry soon. I'm tired of these ex thoughts. I don't want to be with my ex or do anything with my ex. I moved on and I'm happy being with my current boyfriend. I don't know what to do. I feel like a traitor and a cheater. Why is this happening why does it feel real. I'm hurt having these ex thoughts while being with my boyfriend. I'm tired of having to fight these ex thoughts time and time again. I love my current boyfriend I would never be with my ex or do anything that involves with my ex. I don't wanna lose my boyfriend. I'm trying everything I can to prove these thoughts that I don't want my ex. I'm hurt I'm lost. I'm this close to even ending my life because I keep having these ex thoughts while calling my boyfriend. I don't wanna view or think of my ex. I wanna think of my boyfriend. I'm scared. I'm tired. I don't wanna lose my boyfriend I don't wanna keep contuining this cycle. I want these ex thoughts to stop once in for all and let me be happy again with my current perfect boyfriend.

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