Leave me alone!

The fear: I’m not good enough The obsession: my pastors righteousness The compulsion: trying to prove his unrighteousness The story: my wife and I got kicked off the worship team because we were arguing a lot, it’s a lot better now but it’s still not where I’d like it… the pastor who kicked us off is guilty of adultery and in my state that’s even a felony. I’m feeling not good enough because I’m not righteous enough to serve but I haven’t committed adultery… there’s a major conflict here. To make matters worse, my wife picked sides with the pastor, even after I begged him to at least let her serve on the worship team as I self deprecated to prove that she is blameless and that I should be the only one to suffer this punishment. This all happened in January, now it’s July and I’m having a hard time still… Help! I just want these thoughts to go away and leave me alone… I can’t prove his unrighteousness, everyone knows about it and they like him more than me because I’m some sort of OCD freak to them, or maybe that’s just the OCD talking… help!

Username: Ben84Ben84

Date posted: 24w ago

I'd advise seeing a therapist for this situation. If I was basing my perception on your version of events alone, I would say this is a toxic situation that you should leave altogether. A therapist might help you find a way to stay in a healthy way. If they also advise you to leave, they'll be able to offer advice on how to do that.

Username: Jesuslovesme777Jesuslovesme777

Date posted: 24w ago

The Gospel is about Grace my friend, we are saved by Grace alone, through Faith alone, in Christ alone! Not by “works” or “self righteousness” if you’re church is preaching anything different then you’re at the wrong church! Don’t listen to fear, Jesus paid for ALL your sins on the cross, past , present, and future. You are saved and sealed with the Holy Spirit the moment you believe in Jesus and accept his free gift of salvation! This is the only truth, sounds like you’re in the wrong place, maybe it’s blessing in disguise and God wants you elsewhere.

Username: BassetHoundMom

Date posted: 6y ago

Religious OCD trigger warning, mostly about Christianity : My religious OCD is rampant today. I keep having thoughts like: am I really saved? Do I have any fruit in my life? Do I really believe I’m a sinner? Does questioning this mean I’m really not saved? The pastor said you have to know for sure, but what if I don’t? My biggest problem is that I work in ministry so I’m feeling like a big fraud today. The Bible and all pastors say I should have assurance on salvation, but not with OCD. I’m always terrified that I’ll be one of those people who serves in ministry for years and then realizes they were never saved. I used to pray for salvation every day and I really mean it, but then I question it. It is so hard

Username: Andrewspriggs

Date posted: 4y ago

I've struggled with anxiety, depression, and insomnia since I was a young teen and am currently struggling with what seems like scrupulosity (for the past few months I've been fighting with thoughts and feelings that I'm not saved or not good enough to be a Christian and it keeps me up all night half the time). I desperately want help but I'm afraid that I'm just seeking a diagnosis to blame my shortcomings on something other than myself or that going to a therapist would prove that I can't trust in God and go to him first. And the truth is I truly haven't been a good christian and there are many sins I still haven't totally faced and overcome yet and I'm not sure if I ever will be able to. I just don't know how I KNOW if I'm really the problem or if it is OCD. And I'm not looking for reassurance but maybe I am? I just don't know... if it is OCD it also feels like my "obsessions" are constantly morphing and changing and I can't keep up with them. Like I'll go from having existential thoughts to questioning my belief in God to feeling like I'm gonna turn into a creep or lose my mind or turn evil in some way. I'm just so exhausted and need help. I want to be able to turn to Jesus for help but I don't always know how to... I have faith that things will eventually turn out OK but then as soon as a feel secure in that the anxiety and doubt comes back. And even as I'm typing this I'm having thoughts like "its not that bad you just need to toughen up and be patient" and I know that's true but I just feel so alone and like I can't talk to anyone about this and if I do it'll all prove to be true. And as I write this I wonder if I made up all of these thoughts and feelings because I read online and on here about OCD and I'm trying to fit myself into it as an excuse to avoid my real problems... which might just be perfectly true but even if it is I don't know how to fix those problems??? I just want to get out of this loop and be a better person. I don't know if posting this will help. Maybe its even a compulsion in itself. I just want to understand... how do I know if its OCD or if I'm being convicted? Or both?

Religion & Spirituality OCD

Username: Jo5790

Date posted: 2y ago

Religious OCD is making me feel really bad about

For years I was a very anxious person, I acquired anxiety since I was bullied at my school, since I was a child. A few years ago I realized that I was overdoing it with cleaning, I always wanted to wash my hands thinking that if I didn't, I would get some disease. After that time I started to attend my church, I became a very religious person, in this environment I went through some good things and some bad things, I've seen people point the finger at me for some things they liked to do. Then they kept saying that because of my behavior I could become a nun because I was a well behaved person, This stayed in my head and at the same time I felt guilty for not wanting this in my life, sometimes I was afraid that God would punish me. I am currently unable to attend my church as I used to for fear of judgment from people and also for fear of being in a serious sin and someone pointing the finger at me and starting to feel bad.The last time I had a crisis was when I heard from a priest that watching soap operas is a sin, I spent 5 days straight researching this on the internet and the more I couldn't find what I was looking for the more anxious I felt. I caught myself several times asking God to get rid of these thoughts.There was also a time in my life when I was terrified of speaking some blasphemy against the Holy Spirit and never being forgiven by God, The Bible makes it very clear that blasphemy against the Holy Spirit is an unpardonable sin.

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