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This is a repost, only because the last post had no responses lol. Please if you have any advice share. I’ve been trying hard to sit with the feeling of anxiety. Actually that’s the problem, recently I’ve been trying to sit with the thought (and I’m able to for a few hours or until the next morning) and then my anxiety comes back so strong and it’s like I need to clean everything off. I see images of gross laundry getting on everything or my hand and then I need to clean everything off to un contaminate it. Sometimes the thought happens later at night so I just sleep through and the next morning I will wake up with intense anxiety about contamination. That happened yesterday and I had to clean everything off and since then I’ve been traumatized so I’ve been doing compulsions like avoiding the bathroom and being around people so I know I couldn’t have done anything wrong. Actually recently my biggest compulsion has been recording every time I get up to go eat, etc so that I know I couldn’t have done anything. Any advice or help???

This is a long one lol but basically, a couple of weeks ago I went to the toilet (#2, sorry for the tmi). Let's just say it was messy. I remember that a speck of.. #2.. Fell off the piece of toilet paper. This was probably the worst thing that could ever happen. I can't remember clearly but I'm pretty sure my jeans were on the floor underneath near where the speck could have fallen. There was also a towel. I don't know exactly where it fell as it was so small, but I made sure both the towel and the jeans went in the laundry basket and I cleaned the floor near there. Fast forward to like the next day. My mum does most of the laundry, so she will have picked up all the towels and clothes from the laundry basket and taken them to the wash. The problem is the speck. I don't know where it went but if it was on the towel and she picked it up.... Thus, contaminated mum. And she also puts clothes away that are dry. I remember that day she put my hoodie in my wardrobe, and I haven't worn it since because I feel it is contaminated. I haven't worn the clothes that have touched the hoodie. This leaves me with not a lot of clothes. And today I finally snapped and picked up a sweatshirt that had maybe touched the hoodie. And now I'm just sat here spiralling, wearing it. What if it touched the speck? What if the speck touched my mum and then touched the hoodie which then touched the sweatshirt I'm wearing? Please I'm so scared.

contamination ocd has really been messing with me the last couple of days. usually i only struggle when i can connect something to possibly throwing up, but this time it doesn’t matter. so earlier, i took a shower and i also use a wash cloth to wash my body. after i showered i cleaned up my dirty clothes and towels. then when i came back to grab my phone, there was a soap speck on my phone so without thinking i just wiped it on the back of my crewneck i was wearing. well that then spiraled into me thinking what if the soap was from my dirty wash cloth. i know most of you are probably thinking it’s clean since you use soap to clean ur body. well i clean every inch of my body, including my bottom so that’s where my anxiety is gravitating towards. this sounds so ridiculous saying it out loud, but i just have so much anxiety over it. i tried my hardest not to change but i did. at first i just changed my crewneck, but then i had to change my shorts cause my crewneck touches my shorts. but then i changed my shorts. and now i feel like my shirt is contaminated cause i was wearing it with my other shorts before changing. moral of the story, i just have so much anxiety over it and i feel like i shouldn’t because it’s really not a big deal. and i don’t want to change again because that seems ridiculous to me. plus now i’m connecting the contamination to my bed since i was laying on my bed before i changed. i hate life, this sucks.