Staying home from work

So I’m a migraine sufferer and this morning I had a migraine that wouldn’t go away. (it actually started last night) I had to call into work bc I absolutely cannot function when my migraines are that bad. I can barely drive, especially when it’s dark outside when I leave in the mornings. The thing is I just called in a few weeks ago for the same reason. I can’t stop feeling guilt about calling in so soon after the previous attack even though there was nothing else I could do. I took more medicine than I was even supposed to and still tried to get ready but couldn’t make it through the process. It makes me feel even worse bc we already struggle with having enough staff some days. I want to be able to enjoy my weekend but it’s hard when it keeps popping in my head periodically :/

Hey! Just wondering if anyone else has dealt with something similar. A bit of background: I have POTS and had a horrible flare up in March which led to us calling ambulances; I started on meds which didn’t agree with me; the POTS flare passed and left me with horrific anxiety on a level I’ve never experience before. I was still able to go out and do every day things like grocery shopping and see my nan but nothing more. Fast forward a few weeks my uncle dies and the grief and stress triggered a massive migraine, and bc I’ve never had a migraine before it scared me and I thought I was having a stroke or something. The migraine passed but my brain latched onto the fear of it and how it felt to have one. Long story short since the beginning of the year it’s been one thing after another. A few days ago I had the worst panic attack ever downstairs in my house (felt like I couldn’t feel my arm or face) and it sent me into a spiral. I am now terrified to leave the house in case I have a panic attack outdoors, it just feels so unsafe. I went to the shop with my dad yesterday and felt so bad, but i managed to do it and I was proud. Tried again to go to a different shop closer to home because I was already feeling bad, and it was horrific. I started having a panic attack, felt faint, my arm and face went tingly, so we went back home. I’m trying to challenge myself every day but I am really really struggling and not sure what to do at this point. I tried fluoxetine but had horrible side effects (which included a horrific dip in my mood) so I had to stop them. I’m seeing my doctor tomorrow to tell her everything and explain how difficult it is, but I’m just SO scared all the time. It’s like my body is constantly scanning for danger. It’s got to a point where it’s been going on for so long I’m just desperate to try anything to help me feel just a little bit better. I’m not asking for much, I just want to be able to go to the shop without feeling like I’m going to die. My question is has anyone else dealt with anything like this? The panic attacks are terrifying, and even though I know they’re “not dangerous” it does not help because they’re still so so scary and even worse when I’m out of my bedroom because if I’m by myself I can kinda lie down, do some breathing and talk myself round. I just don’t know how to get over this and I’m so so sad because I’m 31 and scared of being stuck like this forever 😭

Does anyone feel like they are stuck in place? I haven’t done anything besides lay in bed on my phone (if I’m not at work) for almost a year now. I have the desire to go out and be a part of the world, but I feel like my body is glued to my bed. I can’t motivate myself to get out of pajamas to go anywhere, and the entire time I’m out (even just at the store) I just want to be home in bed. I mainly just DoorDash food now, when I can convince myself to eat. I’m tired.