ChellyBoo
- User type
- OCD Conqueror
- Date posted
- 5y
ChellyBooChellyBoo
- User type
- OCD Conqueror
- Date posted
- 5y
Yes I do. In the past when I’ve had lots of other thoughts (touching people, hurting people etc) it would say “are you SURE you didn’t do this? What if you did that? Maybe that person you’ve asked has lied to you?”. It is very manipulative. So it feels like no matter what I do it always wants to harm me even when I seemingly have the answer I need.
Ridethewave Ridethewave
- Date posted
- 5y
Omg I have something similar happen to me! I've been with my bf for almost 3 years and when I look back on my previous hookups before I got into a relationship, I'm convinced I actually did the hook up's while in my relationship!!! It drove me mad and I felt like I had to confess
ChellyBooChellyBoo
- User type
- OCD Conqueror
- Date posted
- 5y
Like I know it’s just a thought or a compulsion but my mind is like “why did you think that? Does that mean you want to? Maybe you’ve done it and forgotten about it?” Or even worse I get the thought “you’re using your OCD to cover this up” - I feel like I’ll never go out again at this rate!
Ridethewave Ridethewave
- Date posted
- 5y
Trust me. These are the games of OCD. They make you doubt absolutely everything! Even the OCD itself. Don't worry, before you get yourself deep into the hole of OCD. I suggest practising ERP
ChellyBooChellyBoo
- User type
- OCD Conqueror
- Date posted
- 5y
I have been in the hole allllll day so far. I’ve “checked” my memories and written a detailed account of everything I can remember to try and disprove that it happened. Which I know I shouldn’t have done but because I haven’t had these thoughts for sooooo long I just wanted to feel better ? what is ERP?
Ridethewave Ridethewave
- Date posted
- 5y
Oh no, I did that at the beginning too. And it got me to where I am today ? ERP is Exposure Response Prevention. So basically when you're triggered by a thought, you resist compulsions and resist approaching the thought with fear. Essentially, you're retraining your brain to react to the thoughts. It's a tough process but it's the most affective method to overcome OCD :)
ChellyBooChellyBoo
- User type
- OCD Conqueror
- Date posted
- 5y
So this thought of me doing it, it’s just a thought and I didn’t actually do it? I was on a table full of people, it would have looked a bit strange ? I’m not good with not reacting because I usually try to find “evidence” of things, so how do you just not do this...?
Ridethewave Ridethewave
- Date posted
- 5y
In your case, it would be getting comfortable with living with the uncertainty rather than trying to prove or disprove a thought. When you try to find certainty on your thoughts, OCD will send you through an endless chase. Because once you find that proof you were looking for, OCD will somehow find a way to disprove it. You know what I mean?
zuzazuza
- Date posted
- 5y
Did u drink?
ChellyBooChellyBoo
- User type
- OCD Conqueror
- Date posted
- 5y
I was a little bit tipsy but fully aware of what I was doing.
zuzazuza
- Date posted
- 5y
I am just asking because alcohol is the worst depressant. So is coffee for example. And it can influence you in weird ways sometimes
ChellyBooChellyBoo
- User type
- OCD Conqueror
- Date posted
- 5y
I had a couple of glasses of wine and it had affected me more than what I’m used to drinking which is a gin and tonic, I am not a big drinker. I felt isolated because my friend had gone off somewhere else and I didn’t know anybody on the table which is when others initiated conversation and I’m not very good in these situations.
zuzazuza
- Date posted
- 5y
I’m sorry if it sounds rude or something but here you go! If I feel upset first things I think is - have a been drinkingi within 48 hrs? Did I sleep well? Did I eat well? Did I drink coffee or strong tea? When was my period? Am I feeling comfortable? Did I socialise with anyone within the last few days? The answer is usually there or a result of a few things at once. I definitely think you should consider stopping drinking for a while and take care of your health and see if the thoughts like these go a lil bit
ChellyBooChellyBoo
- User type
- OCD Conqueror
- Date posted
- 5y
I don’t think it sounds rude, but I don’t drink very much (maybe one gin and tonic or a beer once or twice a week). I have a very stressful job (teacher) and I don’t tend to look after myself very well (don’t clean the house as much as I should, don’t always look after my appearance, sleep is bad)
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