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I totally understand what you’re going through because I’ve been navigating a really similar experience myself. It’s so tough when your thoughts start pulling you in a million different directions, especially when you know deep down that you love your partner, but the anxiety and uncertainty make everything feel overwhelming. For me, I’ve had a lot of the same worries — knowing I love my boyfriend, but as soon as things start to get serious, my ROCD goes into overdrive. It’s terrifying to think about those big steps like moving or, in my case, knowing he’s going to propose soon. It’s like a constant battle between the excitement of the future and the fear that the uncertainty will tear everything apart. One thing that’s helped me is reminding myself that love doesn’t always feel like that initial honeymoon phase, and that’s okay. The fact that you don’t want to be with anyone else says a lot about the depth of your feelings, even if they don’t always feel super intense right now. I think it’s really normal for relationships to evolve and for the feelings to shift over time — it doesn’t mean you don’t love him or that you’re making the wrong choice. I’ve also been learning that certainty might not always be possible with ROCD. But just because you don’t feel certain, doesn’t mean your relationship isn’t strong or real. It’s the anxiety trying to make you doubt yourself. Moving is a huge step, and it makes sense that the fear would make your thoughts run wild. But it sounds like, deep down, you really do want to be with him and make this move. The fact that you’re even thinking so deeply about it shows how much you care. You’re definitely not alone in feeling this way, and I’m here if you ever need to talk more about it. We’ll both get through this! ( sorry this is so long)