( pls don’t read this if you’re younger. ) —- — - . I was laying down and having gro!nal responses to nasty images but I didn’t react because I had them last year, but I had a feeling that was like “I wish I could do something to relieve it” and it also feels like I said it too? Omg, that sounds so disgusting, I feel like a bad person. I feel like I don’t deserve to keep going anymore.
I get how your feeling dude this is the absolute worst part for me when it comes to ocd, the groinal and the sense of “urgency” that ocd tells you that you need to get rid of it even though you don’t want it or don’t want to, this is mostly the reason I stay off TikTok or insta and don’t have it because I feel like I’m afraid I’m gonna get the groinal or urges or command thoughts to much and it’s gonna make me feel horrible and panic and question everything, just know I get how you feel dude it makes you feel so disgusting, it kinda feels like your the one saying the thoughts even though your not and it’s just so exhausting
@Brian__ It’s super hard but I tried my hardest to wait out ruminating on it, I recommend doing the same, setting a timer and waiting can help because that’s what I did before going back to this post and seeing what you said
@Brian__ But thank you so much for your reply, I feel less alone
@King silly Tysm dude, I’m happy you did that it’s progress and I know how hard it is but keep doing it, I hope we can get through this man
@Brian__ Also sorry for replying again, I wish you the bestest luck, but I know if you’re afraid of tiktok and insta, you could download them, because that’s basically a trigger and you face your triggers! And eventually they get better, what you do sit with the discomfort as long as you can, and trying to avoid ruminating/ressurance/testing the best you can (possibly set a timer like I did) and maybe that’ll help? Sometimes it can put you in a scary place if it ends up being really bad, so I recommend doing some breathing exercises if it goes wrong, just because it goes wrong does NOT make you a bad person, it just means you need more time and patience
@King silly Tysm for the advice, I wanna get insta again but there’s sm weirdos on there and it’s so overly sexual and p0rn and sexual stuff is one of my biggest triggers not just for ocd but for my ptsd so whenever I hear about it it just causes a shit fest in my mind even if I block the tags and shit it still shows up it’s just ughhhh it’s so annoying 😭, I don’t really want TikTok cus people on there are so chronically online and it’s such black and white thinking and views on that app literally no matter what I do my fyp always ends up showing some weird shit and it’s just like bro 😭, I think the app I’ll get to try to get back into social media is Pinterest, it’s not really a extreme form of social media but it’s still kinda social, and yeah Pinterest has weird stuff to but it’s no where near as bad as insta or TikTok. But there’s no way in hell I’m getting Twitter or Reddit cus holy shit it’s a cesspool of peds and everything under the sun it’s genuinely outrageous (Twitter and Reddit are also my biggest triggers for ptsd to) its just so ughhhh I hate ocd and ptsd sm 😭, but I wanna work my way back up to insta definitely at some point, I just don’t wanna get addicted to it like how I was in the past, Tysm for the advice though I appreciate it
I feel awful. I feel like I’ve received a test from God and failed. I got a groinal response while looking through instagram and saw a picture of a kid. I turned my screen off and laid in bed and I tried to recreate the feeling. I twitched my hips a bit, trying to see if it was real arousal, but now I feel like I don’t deserve to feel better and I’m convinced I am going to hell and will burn for what I’ve done. There was no joy or true desire there, but still, what kind of person does that? I thought OCD meant avoid avoid avoid, that’s not what I did. I don’t feel like a can wait another whole day before my session. Has any else had a similar experience? How do you forgive yourself and keep going when you feel like this?
Was just remembering and ruminating on extremely traumatic and disturbing drawings I looked at as a teen. I'm trying to move past it because I cannot go back and unsee what I've seen, it's so difficult though. Feeling like people would look at me with disgust and I don't deserve the love that I crave desperately.
Does anyone else when they have the thoughts, they feel against it, but they still get arousal or tenglings sensations in the groinal area? Because this is what I experienced today and I feel like crap. This is going to be very triggering for a lot of you, but there are a lot of times that I notice things from kids. For example, there is a thirteen year old kid who looks very developed for her age, and I take notice of (and this already sounds creepy to me) her chest. Today with my thoughts, I imagined as if I were touching it, and although I usually "no no or "I don't want to do that", she is a kid, etc., I still get responses in my groinal area, and It felt very real. Even now, I feel as though I am faking it, even though I groan 😮💨 from it, and feel as though I am a fraud. Does anyone relate?
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