I was going through my old account (I had when I was 12-13) I noticed I was following this little kid that was like trying to flex, and my brain keeps saying weird things, I feel so uncomfortable rn, I keep yelling at it to shut up, pls help guys
It sounds like you’re experiencing a lot of internal turmoil right now. Deep down, you know these thoughts aren’t true; they’re just thoughts produced by your OCD mind. Because you react to them, your mind thinks they’re a threat. You need to practice not engaging with your mind and learn not to take them seriously. Also, you were so young (12-13) that it’s normal you followed some kids at that time. You saw them as your peers, and they weren’t kids anymore for your age,at least you didn't see them as kids. Recognize that it's normal to feel uncomfortable when revisiting old experiences or accounts, especially ones that may trigger certain emotions or memories. Try grounding techniques to bring yourself back to the present. Focus on your breathing or engage in a simple activity, like counting objects in the room or describing your surroundings. When intrusive thoughts arise, instead of yelling at them, gently redirect your focus. Engage in a hobby, listen to music, or talk to a friend to help shift your mindset. If looking at that account is making you uncomfortable, give yourself permission to step away from it. It’s okay to curate what you engage with online. Write down your thoughts and feelings. This can help you process what you’re going through and may reduce the intensity of your discomfort. Be kind to yourself. Remember that everyone has moments of discomfort and self-doubt,it’s part of being human.
I get how you feel. I’ve looked back at old accounts I had at 10-13 and it makes me recoil and think why did I act like that or do those things or think that was ok. It’s genuinely so triggering looking back into the past so I highly suggest not doing it cus it will make you spiral 😭
looked up some controversy involving a youtuber that received allegations & one of those involved minors. you already know. what did I do? submit to a compulsion and tried to compare the doings of that youtuber to mine. checking to see if I had done the same thing. then overthinking about a lot of things. read one sentence of a comment and immediately felt a flare up. had to close the website I was using (reddit) to calm down before my mind gave me horrible thoughts. I am tired of this. like I know what I like: adults. specifically older men. YET WHY DO I HAVE TO KEEP REPEATING SO MANY THINGS TO MYSELF??? WHY DO I ARGUE SO MUCH WHEN DEEP DOWN I KNOW WHO I AM???? why me?
i need some advice!! when i was 16, i was watching an anime and this character had abs and he was 12. i remember at the time (from what i can remember), i made a weird comment on his physique. saying things like “omg how did he become this buff haha.” and “oh im going to jail.” i even said “it’s only a 4 year difference.” like WHAT?!? just because it’s a 4 year difference, doesn’t make it okay. its WEIRD!! why would i say that? i also want to mention that i have a hard time keeping my thoughts to myself bc of my ADHD, so i tend to blurt things out. i just find it disturbing that i would have such thoughts, let alone say it out loud. i never had attraction to kids bc its immorally wrong and disgusting, but i feel no different from the ppl who would hurt children irl. I’ve tried forgive myself multiple times, but what i did is irredeemable. i feel like i am using my OCD as an excuse. i am so scared that i am a p, i want to d1e. my life is ruined.
Idk anymore it feels like being on here is a trigger. Every time I see a minor post on the app, my intrusive thoughts go haywire and then my brain says maybe you should comment something inappropriate and i literally don't wanna fucking do that. It's the last thing I want to do. And now im scared that I commented something crude on someone's post. obviously, when I went to check there was nothing now my brain is saying "you commented and then deleted". I want to think it's something I wouldn't do, but why are the images in my head so real. Children should be safe. I feel like I need to be locked away. Someone please help me.
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