When im in a relationship, the attention from my partner is never enough for my brain. I always seek attention from other men at clubs or bars. I don’t like kiss them or anything but I always expect to get compliments and it kind of ruins the feelings of genuinely enjoying the moment when I’m at a club or bar with friends. I know I have low self esteem, but what can I do to get rid of this feeling?
Did you consider not drinking, avoiding bars and clubs?
@hanysm@gmail.com Yes but going is something I really enjoy and what makes me happy
@taboo_brain19 If I handed you a glass of poison, would you drink it? Probably not. Now, what if I offered you a glass of milk with just a few drops of poison mixed in—would you drink that? I assume the answer is still no. Could I then argue that since most of the drink is beneficial and enjoyable, it’s worth drinking? Do you see the point I'm making?
@hanysm@gmail.com It might not be beneficial in any way but it is enjoyable for me personally and it’s the only time I’m happy. But that’s a me problem
@hanysm@gmail.com It might not be beneficial in any way but it is enjoyable for me personally and it’s the only time I’m happy. But that’s a me problem
@hanysm@gmail.com It might not be beneficial in any way but it is enjoyable for me personally and it’s the only time I’m happy. But that’s a me problem
@hanysm@gmail.com It might not be beneficial in any way but it is enjoyable for me personally and it’s the only time I’m happy. But that’s a me problem
@hanysm@gmail.com It might not be beneficial in any way but it is enjoyable for me personally and it’s the only time I’m happy. But that’s a me problem
@hanysm@gmail.com It might not be beneficial in any way but it is enjoyable for me personally and it’s the only time I’m happy. But that’s a me problem
I relate to this all too much. I dress alt and Gothic and whenever I go out, I think of sceneries of getting compliments and being really flattered but immediately shooting them down if it's a man. It makes me worry tho because why do I want them to say anything? Oh my god, did I fall out of love with my fiancé? I constantly obsess over what my outfit looks like and fix it. I'm desperate for compliments or reassurance about it because what if the colors don't mix or the shirt isn't tucked in properly or my belt is too lose? What if my skirt is too short? Do i stick out from the way my friends/fiance are dressed? What if I look stupid? I unfortunately don't have any advice because I just test my thoughts constantly about it.
In lack of better wording, Sometimes I really just feel like I don’t understand myself and I want to. So I can fix it. I’m looking in the mirror and I’m body dysmorphic, I want to see myself when I was younger and physically healthier but cant. I used to be on birthcontrol, and it made me gain 70lbs and I haven’t been able to feel the same about my body ever since then. Somehow since allowing my ex to semi control everything about our sexual relationship, I have developed a complexity of desired intimacy with myself constantly alone. Because I feel like I want to be in more control with how my sexual feelings affect me. I can’t get sexual gratification from my self sometimes even though, and then I turn to peopke. And then it turns to; I can’t be satisfied by anyone, and I haven’t had sex within a loving relationship for a long time. Because well I have been going through a lot recently. And most of the encounters sexually were in fact not in relationships, but I didn’t feel the satisfaction I was looking for and it just didn’t make sense. I have to have all the right emotions or else the moment gets ruined. If I don’t feel love for them, if I don’t think they are attractive, if I don’t like how they react to seeing my body, if I don’t like how they interact with me during the sexual encounters. And since this is so difficult I All together just don’t desire to have sex with anyone most times I feel mentally aroused. Speaking of just mentally aroused, it confuses me that my body will be physically aroused all the time and beg for satisfaction and it’s a cold burning sensation pleading for constant attention. I hate it. I can’t help but wonder why that exists when I haven’t been mentally aroused. But when it happens I can’t seem to satisfy it and neither can other people. And that somewhat altogether made a plethora of issues in my last relationship because my ex dealt with feelings of guilt and or resentment towards themselves for not being able to satisfy me.. and I would be crying from days on end recently in fact from trying MYSELF to release that feeling, but I’d try to the point my body grew sore. .. I hate it. Genuinely I feel disgusted and want to get help on how to stop this. It’s going to ruin the much healthier relationship I have now just gotten into down the line and I don’t think I can handle that. Not again.
I’m at a loss about what to do. I’ve been with my partner for about a year. I’ve wanted to be with him for 3 years and now I finally have him, I got out of a really toxic 11 year relationship about 4 years ago so I’ve had plenty of time to heal, things where going so great at first in our relationship and I’m still very much happy with him, I love him more than anything, but the past 5 6 months I’ve been having a constant fear that he’s gonna cheat or watch 🌽behind my back any chance he gets , I know that’s a touchy subject for some, but me personally it just makes me feel that I’m not attractive enough,or feel like I’m not good enough, I’ve never found evidence of cheating, and I’ve found 🌽 in his history once but I told him how I felt and he told me he understood how I felt and wouldn’t do it again,and I know the constant asking everyday and needing for reassurance with it is putting a tear in our relationship, I just want to fix it. Does anyone have any advice on how to redirect my brain whenever I start overthinking about it when I’m not around him? It just puts so much stress on me when I’m not around him cause I’m just constantly in my head about it.
Sometimes I catch myself looking at people, specifically men, a little too intently. I feel like I do it to seem prettier or more attractive, but I also think kinda enjoy seeing how they get flustered, I’m not sure. Even though it never goes beyond that, I still feel like I have cheated on my boyfriend, or at the very least, that I am being disrespectful to him. I feel like I’m almost flirting. I don’t know if this is some sort of distortion and or if this is normal. I’m really freaking out to the point where I’m nauseated. Please help. I can’t stop panicking.
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