- Date posted
- 42w
Compulsion
How to handle with a thought that says it’s so easy to do compulsion. Cause I have a compulsion that it very easy to do but I really am fighting with the urge not to. There are ways I can respond to this thought?
How to handle with a thought that says it’s so easy to do compulsion. Cause I have a compulsion that it very easy to do but I really am fighting with the urge not to. There are ways I can respond to this thought?
Like the compulsion take 1 second, and it easy to do at any second but it’s a shameful compulsion I don’t want to do
May I ask what the compulsion was ? I've had compulsions too that I've definitely did not want to do.
@Romy🩷🦕 I think it was to move my lips/tongue but I’m not sure cause every day I have a lot of thoughts and compulsions
@OrMsB Oh I don't think I've had compulsions like that bad I've had many other ones that were way worse but what I suggest doing is to count to 5 distract yourself and take deep breaths even lets say if you do do the compulsions nothing bad is happening your not a bad person remember OCD is tricky sometimes when my compulsions get really bad I draw or watch a movie it helps little bit.
@Romy🩷🦕 I had compulsion way worse than that, that I still regret and promised myself to never do again. But I still have a lot of compulsions And what’s help me a bit it is actually to do homework that I have to think about something else then my ocd even though it’s hard. And yea compulsions are suck like the thoughts
@OrMsB Yes I know how you feel!
@OrMsB Yes I know how you feel! I litterly had one compulsions or really horrible urges were I feel like I need to look at someone leg or face or anything which I really dont want to do I hate it so much even when im out in public i will accidentally look around and lock eyes with someone chest or leg then i quickly look away.. I just can't deal with the anxiety and I just give in and my brain automatically goes why did you do that did you enjoy that wtf is wrong with you is this who you wanna be I'm like no I didn't want to do that that's the exact opposite of what I wanted to do. And now I feel guilt that I did the compulsions it's just really horrible like I didn't not want to look at that.
@OrMsB Epecially sometimes my Ocd will trick me into being like oh if you don't do it something bad is gonna happen to you the next day I try my best to avoid it like I try listening to music or drawing or watching TV but the thoughts are still there it's scary but sometimes the anxiety takes over and sometimes I'm just like ok if you do this it doesn't mean anything it's just your ocd your not a bad person you don't want to do it so I just do it and them my mind is like oh why did you do it and then I get upset it's just so frustrating and I hate myself for giving into the horrible compulsions....
@Romy🩷🦕 I’m sorry your feeling that way and yes compulsion are the worse. Like ocd makes you overthink EVERYTHING to prove your a bad person… and gives you urge that you clearly don’t want
@Romy🩷🦕 I feel like we need to be patient with our self, compulsion are annoying like really annoying and the urge to do them is even more. I had horrible compulsions this summer and stoped them before 2 months. I still have tons but Tons of compulsions but it’s more easer to not fall to the urge when you actually accept that it’s make your ocd worse. Like when you do a compulsion the urge is going to be back in the end and going to come stronger. It’s really really hard to accept but it’s possible. I’m still doing compulsion like 90% of the day but let’s say I stoped the shameful ones. And also I never had the compulsion you had and I don’t want to give reassurance or something cause it’s makes ocd worse but your not a bad person if you are looking at someone that’s your ocd trying to manipulate you
Yeah I hate it thanks for understanding I know this very hard to talk about it's hard for me to talk about it to people because I really don't want them to think of me like a monster or something evil or gross but thanks for understanding..I wasn't sure if I should even share this it's scary to talk about
@Romy🩷🦕 No problem! Ocd is trying to tell you that you are a bad person but your not! I had some compulsions that are were so worse that I’m ashamed to even say , like I’m planning to say them again to my therapist to get it of my chest. I stoped doing them but the amount of guilt is so big. Also may I ask if your going to therapy? (You don’t have to answer if your feeling uncomfortable)
@OrMsB No I'm not I'm looking for pyschiatrist...idk if that's how you spell it.
@OrMsB I used to go to therapy but I stopped I got discharged because I felt like it wasn't helping me at all and it was only causing my anxiety and ocd worse
@OrMsB My therapist would give my breathing techniques and counting so I could distract myself from the thoughts and so I could help me with my issues but I did it it helped little bit but everytime I would get a though in my brain telling me to do this like harm myself or this is gonna happen to you oh do something that I don't wanna do it would just mess me up alot and yesterday was horrible because my dad asked if I was ok what was going on with me I couldn't even tell him because of how bad this is
@Romy🩷🦕 I’m actually going to Therapy for 2 months and my ocd is getting worse too, I just can’t do erp for some reason even though my therapist is very good and it’s nice to talk to someone about it. But it doesn’t help me right now , so I went to Psychiatrist today and I’m going to be on meds to see if things will get better. Did you do tried erp therapy ?
@Romy🩷🦕 I’m sorry it’s bad right now for you, I’m suffering really hard too. And it’s just feels like hell and torture
@OrMsB This is just something I do not want to talk about with my parents because they will not understand they will freak out I have a little niece that I love so much and it's like everytime I see her I freak out and I get scared because I don't want to hurt her like I can't even look at her without getting intrusive thoughts it's just horrible that this is my life now when I was younger I always imagined having kids well not really I'm more of an animal person than a kid person lol but sometimes I would think about it for a second and be like maybe I do want to be a mother and have a family but no I can't do that because of what's going on with me these and I didn't even have this when I was younger either this happened when I was 15 now I'm 21 my life used to be normal. But I still did have some issues back then with self harm and suicide but I guess the more I got older the worse it became.
@OrMsB No I haven't tried erp therapy I just don't think it will help me I just want my old brain back now I'm questioning myself I'm like is that who I am now is that what I like like no I don't want this feeling everytime I tell myself that I feel like I'm faking and not being truthful and I get anxiety in my chest I feel this light headed tingly sensation in my back of my head and knots in my stomach I was asleep all day I was even crying last night it's so bad I'm even getting intrusive unwanted thoughts.
@Romy🩷🦕 Omg I get you so much, being a mom and starting a family was my only dream and now I know I will probably never be able to. I loved kids and now I’m scared of getting closer to them. And about the parents thing I get you, you don’t have to tell your parents that. Maybe if you want you can talk with them about ocd in general but you really don’t have to. I did actually told my parents about every theme that I ever had (even the taboo one) because they wanted to know what’s going on with me and I just exploded. I thought they would dump me and I will go homeless but they hugged me and told me that they are going to help me with this even though it’s going to be hard. I didn’t go to details cause they don’t understand ocd but I told them my themes in general. Now again I will say you don’t have to tell your parents about your themes I get that it’s scary because people without ocd could never understand what’s it’s like to live like this
@Romy🩷🦕 I get you, I feel the same too. I’m doing erp (well I’m supposed to but not doing that because I feel like I can’t) but I heard that’s help most of the people with ocd if they giving it a chance (I just don’t give erp the chance, sorry for my terrible English). But I want my old brain too and my life before the age of 15, after that things went down hill. I get you so much I know the feeling I promise. I’m sorry it’s hard right now.
@OrMsB I wish I could go back in time and erase everything that's happening to me every thought and every compulsions. I honestly think I need to forget everything that's happened to me forget I have ocd and this I want a clean fresh brain and go to the hospital and ask the doctors if I could get something to help me not remember anything so I can think happily and normally again and not ever worry about this the only thing I would want to remember is my family my pets my friends my hobbies what I'm good and what I like to do for fun like drawing and going out to the movies with my mom people who were good to me in my life and the good things that have happened to me and good things I did not the bad
@OrMsB I wish they could be like ok your brain is normal now no signs of stress no ocd your fine you have a clean brain you won't be able to remember what something bad has happened in your past or a worry or any compulsions you did you live normal and you can be around kids without any stress or anxiety and you can finally be happy that's all I want....
@Romy🩷🦕 I understand and I’m sorry
@OrMsB - I honestly don't know if I should still even be alive or end it I'm not even trying to be dramatic but I feel like something bad is going to happen, especially with me I don't even know why this one compulsion is affecting me so much you know how many times I avoided doing them and other times I gave in a little bit but it was like I knew that was my OCD and I never gave in any thought about those compulsions I knew I was still a good person but this on the time it just like you know what that's it and this one time I gave in it's like I'm at an endpoint already I'm sorry I still don't know what to do I keep going and forgive myself and live happily or do I just I don't know if I'm still me anymore...I know this is probably too much for you I never even thought about joining a group I've seen videos about NOCD on TikTok and was like oh that's cool but now here I am
@OrMsB - All I know is that if I ever and I mean ever give in to the compulsions again as this one I'm done for. i litterly made i promise to myself about no matter how bad the compulsions get i will never do them and this time i broke that and now i cant go back and refixed whats already broken but im really trying to find hope that i know i still can go on in my life without this being a burden on my shoulders and that i know im a good person ive never hurt anyone and i know that but it feels like i did and i know again thats OCD making me feel this way but when will it pass when will i feel normal again its been a week and im still dwelling on this i just cant seem to let it go or move past it because i feel like if i let it go i will like what happened and i dont want that i hope this passes and i hope i find peace and im so tired of talking about this with people on here i keep repeating the same things over and over like thats gonna change anything and i pray to god that he knows that he can help me with this and pray to him that these horrible urges and feelings go away i just really i hope i can move forward with this and just be happy like i used to be i just dont want this to be who i am this cant be who i am it just cant be my mind has already accepted the worst possible scinario sorry i know im rainting i just feel the need to because of how much this is bothering me like again i know this is a compulsion but it bothers me alot i just think i need to let this pass until i feel like me again i dont know how long its gonna be who knows hopfully not forever some days i feel good and feel like its over and that its passed but i still feel like its there in the back of my mind like its not going anywere and some days my feeling of guilt and dwelling come back also with the intrusive thoughts and unwanted urges maybe because i am thinking about it alot and thinking to myself did i want this? why did i do it? you know and its a repeat cycle then i get all depressed then i start to bed rot all day maybe it is ocd sorry for rainitng again hope you have a good night
@Romy🩷🦕 Yea I get you so much, the feeling like your not yourself. I started to suffer from ocd a year ago (apparently had this before but thought it was normal to have these kinda thoughts) and I’m not feeling like my self for so long. Like I changed to the person I was afraid. Every second of the day is hard to be honest ocd is REALLY hard. I get you. And yes I’m the same I joined to nocd because of tiktok too. Even though it’s not good for me cause I want reassurance all day. And I’m sorry your suffering too right now but you deserve to live the life you want and not letting your ocd be the driver. I get that it’s hard cause ocd right now is every second of the day for me but really I’m saying this for me and you. We can’t lose hope! Ocd is hard like really but I hope we can do it and will be able to live life when ocd don’t bothering us. Don’t lose hope! If you need to talk to someone I’m here
@Romy🩷🦕 It’s really all good! I understand you and relate with the compulsions I did two months ago and still regret them every day every second and I swore to never to them again too. I really get you. And I know your a good person and don’t lose hope for having the life you want it’s hard but i think it’s possible
@OrMsB - thanks i appreaciate it. its hard to belive that but i will try my best sending positivity and peace.
@Romy🩷🦕 Yes I know trust me, hope things get better for us!
I’m a bit curious, I’ve come up with many ways to handle them, I don’t have therapy, but how do ya’ll deal with them? Is it normal to come up with other compulsions to kinda just tame them? Or to convince yourself they’re not real? I’ve had different ways of handling them, but most times I get obsessed with the way of handling it or the thought that helps me beat the bad/concerning/thoughts to the point it just stops working and I need to find a more effective thought, compulsion or thing.
I am struggling right now with intrusive harm urges. They feel real and it feels like I am going to act any second. It feels like I have to hold myself back, which is a scary thoughts. I am trying so hard not to compulse, but does anyone have tips on what they do in these situations?
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