Relationship doubts

I’ve been struggling with relationship OCD and differentiating between what is an intrusive thought and what is a real doubt. I was really happy with my partner then I got one aggressive thought that I didn’t love him and this spiralled into noticing all his flaws. I struggle being around him because I feel a huge sense of guilt that these thoughts even come into my head and I cannot figure out if this is my brain lying to me or this is how I feel. It’s really impacting a relationship that is so important to me.

Relationship OCD

Username: amy59amy59

Date posted: 24d ago

I'm so sorry you're going through this. Relationship OCD can be incredibly challenging, especially when those intrusive thoughts make you question something so important. I remember having a similar experience where I suddenly doubted my feelings for my partner, and it spiraled into overanalyzing every little thing. It was so hard to sit with those thoughts without letting them take over. It's important to remember that these thoughts don't define your true feelings, even if they feel so real. You are strong enough to navigate through this uncertainty. Have you considered reaching out to a therapist who specializes in OCD to help guide you through these feelings? You deserve support as you work through this.

Username: sgray4sgray4

Date posted: 24d ago

@amy59 Thank you! It’s so relieving to hear other people having similar experiences. I do intend to find a specialist just struggling to find one that works for me. Thank you so much I really appreciate your message

Username: wanda81wanda81

Date posted: 24d ago

I really feel for you, and I've been there so many times with relationship OCD. What’s helped me get through these tough moments is using a disengagement phrase, like "This is just my OCD talking," and then focusing back on what I was doing before the thought popped up. Please try not to be hard on yourself; living with OCD is incredibly challenging, and you're doing your best in your messy mind. You can get through this.

Username: sgray4sgray4

Date posted: 24d ago

@wanda81 Thank you Wanda. I’m new to this app and to OCD in general so I really appreciate your message. I will try that disengagement phrase ! Thank you

Username: purplepandapurplepanda

Date posted: 24d ago

i’ve been struggling with the same thing. I’m still in the thick of it but I think that sometimes we have doubts that may be based on fact yes, but we are overreacting to them due to overanalyzing with rocd. For example my boyfriend is quiet yes but that would never bother me as much as it has due to rocd. We have differences but they were never huge red flags until i experienced rocd. If you notice your worries are mainly exaggerated due to overthinking just try to be present and label the thoughts as rocd for awhile. that’s what im trying to do. doubts are normal in relationships but the hyperfixation is what is making them so unbearable. hope this helps !

Username: sgray4sgray4

Date posted: 24d ago

@purplepanda This is so relatable it’s so nice to see someone who feels the same. You are right that’s a good way to think is it. We have this !! Thank you for your message.

Username: Lady Sombra Lady Sombra

Date posted: 24d ago

I am with you, bro🙏🏻❤️

Username: brhtpurple

Date posted: 4y ago

I’ve had doubts my whole relationship with my boyfriend. Things like “you don’t find him attractive. You don’t think he’s funny. You’re lesbian because you don’t love him. You don’t love him at all. You think he’s annoying. You think his face looks weird. You want to be with other guys. He doesn’t make you happy.” But I always cry and get upset at the thought of losing him. Is that ocd, or something wrong with the relationship. It’s so hard to tell if this is Rocd or if this is one of those, “you never loved nor were interested in him in the first place.” Type things. I want to be interested and in love with him so bad, but I feel like all these thoughts get in the way. :( I don’t get that crazy “you love him so much,” feeing everyone talks about. Like yeah I know I feel for him and love him for who he is, but I don’t feel crazy deep in love :(

Relationship OCD

Username: .ketamine.ki...

Date posted: 3y ago

My relationship OCD has been severe lately and with seemingly no trigger to cause this flare up. I am constantly anxious, doubtful and panicked that I don't love my partner, overanalyzing whether or not I'm attracted to him, and ruminating on the numbness I feel when we are together. Every idea I can come up with to test and check to see if there's that love feeling, that attraction or interest/excitement in doing things together feels invalid, like it won't work. I get triggered further when my partner asks me if I'm okay, and that wave of panic comes back. I can't tell if this is OCD, or if it's my gut telling me it's not a relationship I should stay in. We've been together for five years, I'm not in OCD therapy, and I've been off meds for four months now.

Relationship OCD

Username: cam1724

Date posted: 1y ago

Please help me, my relationship ocd is so bad 😞

It has completely switched to me being scared I don’t want to be with him. I’ve been struggling for days. I’ve been googling stuff all day too. And then my friend asked me “do you actually like him?” And it’s been stuck in my head. And then I answered yes but my head was like do you really though? Can it really convince you that you don’t and that you’re lying to yourself? And can you feel like you’re lying to them about it all? It makes me feel sick. And then my friend said “I think you’re just second guessing things because you’ve never been in a healthy relationship” my mind keeps going to “what if you really are not mean to be together? You know deep down. What if you’re having all these thoughts because you just aren’t mean to be?” And I don’t have like insane butterflies or infatuation with him like I did my previous partners, but they were so abusive and toxic. Im so terrified my mind will convince me to break up with him and I don’t want to 😞

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