- Username
- Anonymous
- Date posted
- 5y ago
Its your ocd, thoughts can get crazy, hang in there, love for u
Thank you!!
When I first started with this theme I thought no one else had it so mine was probably true and it wasn’t ocd but when I had the thoughts it came more like a fact so basically as something I really believed and then I’d question it bcus I knew I didn’t believe it but I’d still come back and think do I really believe this like it
This is exactly my situation! I’m having complete anxiety and a sinking feeling every time the thoughts pop up cause I’m like convincing myself I believe the thoughts. I had one random thought like what if you believe people aren’t real and they really are like monsters or something and they are gonna hurt you? I knew how crazy that thought was but I was like oh my gosh what if I believe it and I’m gonna go crazy!! I haven’t been able to stop thinking about it and then I start to look at people differently. It’s so scary. I know I’m being ridiculous but at the same time it feels so real. I’m scared of losing it and hurting someone as well.
@hannie Hey, I know this whole thread is like 4 years old, but im hoping your still active on this app because im dealing with the EXACT same thoughts, everyday about everything. Like you said i get crazy thoughts like “what if my wife is a demon and trying to get to me” “what if nobody is real and these are all monsters/demons out to get me” etc etc. the thoughts are absolutely terrifying and they make me look at people differently, and i have to question myself whether I truly believe the thoughts or not, they feel so real, when they come on I almost catch myself genuinely feeling paranoid that they are 100% real and having a panic attack, but then the tiny bit of me that’s still rational brings me back to reality. And from then on I have to question myself all day “do I really believe this?” “Well you technically can’t disprove those things” “if it’s not real, then why does it FEEL real?” “This really is schizophrenia” “ what if it’s not schizophrenia but ACTUALLY real?” “who do I go to for help?” “What if I can’t trust anyone” etc, it’s literally hell. I can never give a satisfying “No, I don’t believe this” to these thoughts. I can go days and weeks and be able to confidently shrug them off and tell how ridiculous they are only for them to come back with a vengeance the next day. Please tell me if this is how it was for you… I could really use some reassurance even though I know it’s bad. I have never been like this before until I started doing breeding over schizophrenia. I’ve been like this for 8 months now.
Mine started off as being scared of sounds because I was scared that I was going to hear something then the intrusive thoughts came bcus I was triggered by something someone said to me and after that it was all I thought of and when the thought popped up my body would freeze for like some seconds and get hot I’m guessing that was my anxiety lol but I knew it wasn’t something I believed but I am also scared of hurting someone and just completely losing myself
Do you ever think you believe the fake thoughts, even for a split second or do you recognize right away you definitely don’t believe it? Like When I first have the thought I’m like oh my gosh I think I believe this and then I’m like no way is it true. It like takes me a minute. Then I question myself all day as to why I had the thought and tell myself that nobody else would think these thoughts so I must be losing it.
I get scared that maybe something is different from my experience that means it’s actually schizophrenia and not ocd but if you don’t mind how long have you been dealing with ocd?
I struggled with this awhile ago and it felt exactly how you two are explaining it, I began to say to myself ‘I will accept the uncertainty that I may go crazy’ (it’s very hard to begin with I know) but it has helped leaps and bounds, you are not crazy to clarify but what if you were you’d get help and be ok, I know many schizophrenics who live totally normal lives medicated, keep saying to yourself it doesn’t matter if you are, schizophrenics don’t go around hurting people, only a small percentage do that. It will get better, mine has, it comes back from time to time and I just say the same to myself! Everything will be alright just stop checking.
Thank you for taking the time to respond! I never looked at it that way of getting help and living a normal life even if I am. I always just thought it was a life sentence and I would spend the rest of my life in a psych ward. ( I’m not trying to sound mean for people who struggle with schizophrenia). I guess I really wasn’t educated on that part. I just have a deep fear of losing control over myself and acting on thoughts because I believe they are real or something. It’s so scary. The thoughts scare me more then the fear of actually going crazy if that makes sense. Again, thank you so much for responding. You are so strong!
Yes! I’ve had 2 themes so far and I feel like this one was harder than the pocd one but I think I’ve had it since I was like in my teens because I have some memories of it but it just faded until this year on august I started off with pocd and the schizophrenia theme
I started with POCD too it and I have had ROCD and HOCD too, OCD is a funny thing but it can be beat.
The schizophrenia theme has been the worst for me too. I really wish sometimes I could go back to my first theme lol. I don’t feel like any of it is easy though cause at the time it feels so real and scary. I just feel like this is really scary now because I’m dealing with it. I remember I was really scared at the time I was dealing with harm OCD as well. OCD is a pain in the ass. It’s so frustrating to doubt everything and normal things that use to be easy are a struggle like going to the store and being around others. I’m just afraid I’ll lose it in front of people as well. Any ways thank you both for responding. I think you guys are so brave and strong and amazing people. We will fight this. If you guys are ever struggling just come back to this post and we could all just work it out together! Stay strong guys. I’m thinking of you guys and sending positive thoughts?
Out of nowhere everything just sounded so for away for like a second
I want to google the starting symptoms of schizophrenia but I know it’s also a compulsion
I’m going through the same fear at the moment. It feels so so real. I have convinced myself I am gonna lose touch with reality at any minute. I have been having this fear the last few days. You’re not alone!! I’m right there with you!
Yes and I’m expecting to hear something or hallucinate and when it doesn’t then my brain comes up with something, I’ve even been rethinking my own thinking process and how loud my thoughts are sometimes
@xxxxi We are seriously going through the exact same thing right now. I’m also experiencing what I think are “fake delusion”. My intrusive thoughts are bizarre and so I keep checking to see if I believe them or not. Or if I’m delusional. It’s so frustrating. I feel like I’m gonna lose it any second.
@hannie Yes! That was me at the beginning where I’d have thoughts of something that related to what a person with schizophrenia would have and then I’d question if I really believed them when I knew I didn’t, it calmed down for like 2 weeks and now it’s back
I think also I had that thought cause I use to read forums online with people struggling with schizophrenia and my brain is somehow mocking it and putting It as intrusive thoughts. So scary.
I think mine started when I was working on my pocd theme and I had just found out I had ocd and my friend was talking to me about schizophrenia and I just thought maybe this is what I have and ever since then I’ve been stuck with this theme
I have definitely had that as well. I would check over and over to make sure I wasn’t hearing things. I would even ask people if they were hearing certain sounds and noises too. I also get that hot feeling your talking about and it’s so uncomfortable. I can’t even talk about schizophrenia or read about it without getting some level of anxiety. This theme has come and go for me as well. I have also struggled with harm OCD, existential, and religious themes. I thought this theme had completely gone away but unfortunately it hasn’t. I too also believed it was something worse then OCD and I was just gonna lose it.
That’s exactly how mine is. It comes like a fact and then I get a rush of anxiety and have to check to see if I believe it or not. I think all the time that’s it’s something more then anxiety just cause it’s so intense. I think a part of me has struggled with OCD even in my childhood. I didn’t start really know the symptoms until 2015. I had a huge life change and it kind of just triggered my OCD. I was struggling with generalized anxiety as well as PTSD from a bad car accident prior the OCD symptoms. My OCD then started with the harm theme. Do you mind if I ask when you’re symptoms started?
Anyone else feel like they are going to get schizophrenia and be a crazy person?
I’ve just had the freakiest moment. My ocd is related to losing myself and last night I was just let in bed and instantly felt like a different person. It’s like someone just went and rewired my brain right there. Since that moment, I haven’t slept all night. It’s like my subconscious doesn’t want me to. Like I’ve tried and pushed the moment out my mind, but my alarm just went for college and I can’t believe I’ve basically been awake all night bc I’m hanging. Idk what to do, I’m so scared. I feel like this is real. I’ve had depersonalization and it doesn’t feel like that - it feels like someone actually just went into me. Anyone had this??
So scared of becoming delusional, does anyone else struggle with this? Is it possible for your intrusive thoughts to copy delusions? As well as thinking you believe the thought for. Split second? I’m also feeling like I’m losing touch with reality. Does anyone have advice. I’m scared this is the beginning of me losing my mind.
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