How do ya'll deal with not having any support from family? I had a panic attack yesterday and I didn't know what to do so I called my dad in hope he might offer some support. But all he did was scream at me and said that I should "stop whining". I understand that it might be annoying to deal with a family member with mental health issues. But his comment has hurt me so much and makes me feel like I am all alone in this.
also, sorry that your dad reacted that way. I 100% know how it feels to be unheard and just screamed at. I hope you find the support you need and deserve š¤
Thank you for your kind words. It's just so incredibly humiliating to get scolded for having OCD and panic attacks. There is already so much shame and stigma coming by simply having this illness. And then my own dad treats me as if I am just acting like a toddler throwing a tantrum for attention. As if I could just turn it off When in reality it is a serious debilitating illness, I didn't choose to have.
try to find anyone for support other than family maybe, like a friend? Or you can always try to call crisis lines which offer support! I do that sometimes when I feel like I have no support from anyone.
His reaction might include panic and a sense of helplessness, or even denial. However, it's important to understand that these responses are not driven by any malicious intent. I recommend seeing a specialist for a proper diagnosis if you haven't already. Additionally, consider directing your family to resources that can help them better understand and support someone dealing with OCD.
Yeah, I mean I know that it is probably hard on him as well having me as a daughter with OCD. What get's to me is just the conflicting messages I receive from my parents. Like, they will say things like "We will always be there no matter what" and "You can always call us when you need help". But when I do they get angry with me. I've been with therapist before and git diagnosed. I've also suggested that to my parents but they refuse because and say they don't need it since they are "not the ones having problems".
@Anonymous I think their reaction is because they think that the only way to help you is to make you snap out of it. No matter what is happening, know that they care about you and their reaction doesn't reflect their feelings. They probably just as anxious and terrified of loosing their daughter as you are. Instead of asking them to attend sessions, send them some videos links to watch, it should be softer way to educate them. Good luck to you, dear
@hanysm@gmail.com I am not sure about that. It is not the first time they get angry and scream at me for having OCD issues. Even though I have told them repeatedly that it doesn't make things better. But it actually makes things much much worse. I have told them that it is ok when they want to set boundaries and tell me if I should stop calling them for help. But then they will respond with "No no, you can always call yada yada". I just whish they were honest with me. I understand that they can be overwhelmed with me and my illness. But I don't think it is ok for them to promise support and then react like that when I ask for help.
@Anonymous I have been in their shoes and did exactly what they did. I believed that by pushing my son hard, I could make him see reality and come to his senses. Eventually, things got so bad that I realized I wasn't helping. I needed to educate myself more about the illness and understand what exactly goes through the mind of someone with OCD. Only then could I adjust my behavior with him. Initially, I thought my son could and should control those "stupid" thoughts. Despite knowing he is smart, I couldn't understand why he couldn't stop them. Now, I realize those thoughts are not under his will or control. It's his OCD brain generating those thoughts and the associated feelings of anxiety. Please read this post, and perhaps you can share it with others to help them understand. https://app.treatmyocd.com/community/posts/2043944
So I was at a family thing yesterday and my ice was bothering me and I kept washing my hands and my family noticed and started making fun of me for it and it was like non stop it made me feel really alone especially since they clearly know somethingās up but they just make it worse instead of at least trying to helpš
Yesterday I had a panic attack from OCD fears. I live alone, so in my panic I called my mum just to get some emotional support. It did not go well. I was asking for reassurnce to much and basically she got annoyed with me and started to chastise me. She said I was being ridiculous and accused me of just making up my symptoms to emotionally manipulate her. She even went as far as threatening to call the police on me to have me sectioned. I feel so humiliated. I know that I can be annoying during my panic attacks, and that my OCD puts a massive toll on my familiy. But I don't want to manipulate people. Now, I feel like an abuser. In these moments, seeing how much my weakness makes my family suffer makes me just want to not be here anymore.
LONG VENT POST: This is my second post of the day. Seriously, I am SO sorry. I have therapy tomorrow, I promise I will shut up after this lmao. Anyway, for Memorial Day weekend, I spent it at my aunt/uncles vacation house. Fortunately it wasnāt a big crowd - just my mom, grandmother, aunt, uncle and I. For context, I come from a pretty big family, and I am the youngest of 7 cousins and a younger sister to two brothers. All my cousins are in their early to mid 20ās, each very successful in school and their careers. My half brother is 29, and absolutely crushing it. My full brother is turning 23, heās also doing amazing with school. I just turned 20 in April, I feel very lost. I know I want to be a forensic psychiatrist one day, and that I want my PhD. I want to be the best therapist I can be, but the fact that I barely get by with ocd/adhd has been discouraging me, so I currently feel like a flop. Anyway though, spending time with my aunts/uncles/cousins/grandparents triggers my ocd the most, as majority of them can be on the judgmental side. ESPECIALLY my aunt, sheās on my moms side, and she and my mom are total opposites. My aunts a very calculated, straightforward, logical, stern, sassy buisnesswoman. Sheās successful, but lacks a lot of understanding and can be so cold and just mean. My moms a kindergarten teacher in a struggling community, and sheās always thinking about others before herself, extremely emotional, caring, but neglects her own needs a lot. Theyāre sisters, and they bump heads a ton. My aunt and all of her kids arenāt neurodivergent. They simply donāt understand mental health. My mom does, thank god. My aunt and uncle think that if a kid is having a psychotic break, then that kid should be kicked out of the house and not helped at all. My mom and I entirely disagree with this idea, and that someone clearly mentally suffering NEEDS mental health help asap, and they need to be home. The streets are the last place someone suffering should be. While we were vacationing at the house, my mom argued about this with my uncle. I was asleep, thank god, but I seriously hate having people in my family like this. I can never tell them about me having ocd, theyāll think itās just an āexcuseā for not getting things done, or just me trying to feel special. The reality is, they donāt get it. My full brother went through the worst psychotic break a few years ago. It lasted two years on and off due to bipolar disorder, but thank god he got himself help and heās doing absolutely amazing now. Heās frustrated and embarassed with himself but now heās on track, and as I said, crushing it with school. But the entire time he was going through this, my aunt and uncle just didnāt understand. To keep it short, they thought his mental problems were behavioral, and that heās a ācrazyā kid. The reality is, he was coping with the loss of his childhood best friend and our other uncle who was like a second father figure to us. He had manic episodes from the grief and self medicating with drugs and alcohol. This was all the while Covid was happening and he was a freshman at a college states away. He was so vunerable. Iām saying all this because, well, how am I to seriously be forward about my mental struggles when they couldnāt even show the slightest amount of empathy to my brother, who was struggling, so much more intensely than me? Iām quiet at family gatherings when theyāre around for this exact reason. I have so much resentment toward them for it. I try to avoid them when I can, because I love them, I just hate their actions/views. What do you guys do with these kinds of people?
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