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I am going to just focus on this phrase - accidentally voluntarily. I want to really dive into this, because it is classic OCD ridiculousness. How would anyone accidentally voluntarily do anything. If I were to be driving and making a turn and did not see that there was a person there and I graze them with my car, did I accidentally voluntarily do this, or was it just an accident. If I choose to do something but do not like the result that I get from it, am I voluntarily doing it, but accidentally? How can I ever know if anything is an accident or voluntarily done if it can be both. I think that this is OCD trickery here and that it is using this phrase however it wants to use it to get you to do a compulsion. Please, do not go down this rabbit hole, as it will not serve you well. If you need help with this, we have an amazing team ready to assist you here at NOCD - please do not hesitate to reach out and work on getting out of the OCD cycle that you may be stuck in.

I think I accidentally create the image but saying “I would never imagine ____ and then that exact things happened. I feel so bad though because I would never want that. I hate this

You wrote "it's not normal to think things like that" when we ALL THINK THINGS THAT ARE NOT NORMAL, believe me I've had thoughts about all the things you mentioned too...we all have intrusive thoughts, every one of us with OCD thinks the same thoughts that everyone else on the planet does, it's just that they stick to us with OCD. We analyze them, try to understand them-when there literally is no understanding to be done at all! That's the hardest part to grasp...easier said than done! You'll get there...keep on keepin' on