Obsessing over coworker for months OCD

You know when you have weird thoughts about a coworker and because you have OCD these thoughts really stick and you panic and feel sick? Yeah that’s me and I’ve struggled with having intrusive thoughts about my coworker and now he just got in a relationship with my coworker and my intrusive thoughts are WORSE I thought they would be better? And initially they were because I was relieved that he couldn’t be weird with me now because he has a girlfriend. But this is the thought that i cannot get over- my OCD is like you’re jealous that he doesn’t like you and he’s not with you instead and i envy this girl he is with. Why the fuck am I having these thoughts while I’m in a healthy relationship and love my boyfriend to DEATH- like I know he is my forever. I couldn’t look at him today because I’ve been obsessing over this thought I’ve had in work and now I have to find a new job I hope no one will judge me for these thoughts or maybe someone has had this weird thought before? :(

Relationship OCD

Username: ChibeeChibee

Date posted: 11w ago

I’ve dealt with this! My entire time working at this job I am now leaving, I have had a “crush” on a coworker. I say “crush” in quotations because it was more intrusive and agonizing than it was enjoyable. Caused me grief everyday. All the OCD symptoms you can think of, to the max. I have a boyfriend too, so you can imagine my ROCD was just on full haywire. I have some comforts to share! They DO get better. It did take me half a year, but once I began to just,,,, not care, my intrusive thoughts and feelings began to fade. As difficult as it may sound, you have to train yourself to not respond to your thoughts and feelings. I do not mean to indulge in the fantasies, but to just not engage with them at all. Don’t replay conversations you had with him. Don’t obsess over interactions and feelings you have. When he’s nearby, ignore him. Focus on something else. Some of this may sound counterintuitive to OCD practice, but I’ve found “accepting” the thoughts did not work for me. What worked was letting them exist BUT deliberately not putting myself in positions that encouraged them. In most OCD situations, you can’t do this. Exposure heals, as they say. But when to comes to ROCD and you’re afraid of being unfaithful, I would say its best to also maintain DISTANCE while also “exposing” yourself to the thoughts by allowing them to pass. Some days, my brain gave up and I would COMPLETELY forget he exists! Again, it may not work for you, but it worked for me. And I have been searching for solutions for months! Good luck!! ♥️

Username: ChibeeChibee

Date posted: 11w ago

@Chibee Also, if you find you can’t help but “replay” thoughts of him, (bc it’s easier said than done right?) then just let it be. Don’t focus on the guilt that this is making you feel. It will feed the OCD and increase the obsession. Baby steps. You will find yourself slowly thinking of him less over time.

Username: ChibeeChibee

Date posted: 11w ago

@Chibee Same if you find you can’t ignore him or avoid him—OCD does what OCD does and you can’t control the thoughts. But you can control how you respond to it. Act like you don’t care at all!

Username: AnonymousAnonymous

Date posted: 11w ago

@Chibee Thank you so so much for this I feel like I haven’t heard anyone talk about this enough. Like it begins with a normal thought which every human has where you see someone as attractive- but with OCD I have obsessed over every little conversation I have and then of course the weird images of the person etc and I was able to deal with those until I had the intrusive thought that I was jealous of his new girlfriend that one has KILLED me because it’s so weird. But I really appreciate your input on this from someone who has gone through it, thank you for taking the time to write that. I hope you’re doing ok you are so strong for being able to overcome and cope with those kind of thoughts 💗

Username: hosihosi

Date posted: 6w ago

I am going through this right now. My intrusive thoughts were sayings like ‘this person’s the one’ or when I visualize being with someone else, that person keeps popping up and I panic. Because of all this, it felt like I had to panic 24/7. I have also realized that I have not enjoyed living in panic and in intrusive thoughts so I decided to move on from them. I could not even look at them or talk to them and I feel uncomfortable around them because I’m scared that I would catch feelings for them. You’re not going through this alone so don’t worry. We will go through this together! :)

Username: AnonymousAnonymous

Date posted: 6w ago

@hosi Yeah I’m like this. I actually don’t look any male in the eye as I am passing them etc. I can in conversation but I’m very blunt in case I say something that I will overthink for hours or days. Thank you hopefully we can get through it

Username: helpisappreciated48helpisapprec...

Date posted: Yesterday

has anyone gotten over this theme? and if so, how?

Username: Nocd1997!

Date posted: 23w ago

ROCD

Hi friends! I am someone who struggles with general OCD but have recently come to question if it is more specific to my relationship(s). In my heart, I feel that I am currently in the most loving, fulfilling and safe relationship that I have ever been in but lately things have been rocky. I find myself questioning a lot. Examples being: Is he really the one for me? What if I am missing out on something even better? Am I actually happy or am I lying to myself? Is this relationship doomed/am I doomed to be miserable in the future due to our age difference (met at 25 & 32, currently 27 & 35) I find myself trying to pick him apart more often than not lately, almost as though I am looking for something to fixate on in attempt to reassure myself of some of my already negative thoughts? I’m just curious if anyone out there that struggles with ROCD finds any similarities to the thoughts I am having? Sending love!

Username: JimJimAlabim

Date posted: 22w ago

Intrusive thoughts over new relationship

Around a month ago I got out of an almost 2 year relationship. In that time I met someone that I ended up developing a crush on and today we decided to start dating. Since earlier today, I’ve had a lot of intrusive thoughts about a variety of things, the two biggest being if I actually like this person and the if it’s too soon for me to be back in a relationship. I know I like this person and we have amazing chemistry I just want some advice on the situation.

Relationship OCD

Username: Anonymous

Date posted: 17w ago

Please help, ROCD is too much

I have an amazing fiance, our anniversary is coming up soon and I'm very excited, but my head keeps going back and forth on I love him or actually you don't love him. You hate him. It's so distressing. I keep looking up things to save relationships and comparing our relationships to other people like what am I doing wrong? And anytime I think of it, I also start thinking what if all of this is just in my head and it's not real or I'm just faking all of this. It's constant back and forth and it's making things hard. I'm not texting him as much as I use to and he noticed it. He feels bad and I don't want him to think it's his fault. He's the best fiance I've ever had and I don't want to lose him, but I want these thoughts to go away. Is it even ROCD or am I just losing it? I know I have OCD around food and gross sexual intrusive thoughts but I don't know if it's effecting other aspects of my life (I was only recently diagnosed) Please help, anyone.

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Obsessing over coworker for months OCD

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