hocd sucks. i literally see a girl and think she’s pretty. which is normal. but then my brain is like “omg do you think she’s pretty in the same way you think a guy is cute? because if so then you’re bi” and it does that everytime i notice an attractive woman. ugh.

@ElliotC with hocd the sufferer wishes that it didn't matter to them, trust me. Having the disease doesn't mean they have a negative outlook on the whole idea of being bi, but rather they are uncontrollably doubting their own sexual identity. It's the nature of the disease to doubt, and doubt is an underlying factor in many subcategories of the disorder. You should definitely read about them!

I know it’s hard to stop but the more you say don’t think about the problem the more it chases you

@GummyDrop Is not about not saying no. You have to identify when the obsession appears and try to stop answering them. Is not about saying "No, Im not this". But: "Okay. I have this thought. Thoughts doesn't have to be me. And now Im going to do another thing and live my life cause I deserve this." Try to find a good therapist that understand you is the better answer too :3

I’m not homophobic, if your gay and your happy that what your life should be. Happiness. It’s just that I’ve lived a heterosexual life then hocd hit me, I just don’t feel comfortable dating a girl, I’ve always wanted to be with boys and date them.

It's more about identity changing, less about being gay itself.

@hateocd123 ? Me?

@GummyDrop No I was talking to ElliotC

@hateocd123 And also when I thought I was gay, I thought the problem would be easier to talk about cause I could talk to the lgbt community, but no I feel like some gay people will say your gay cause they want you to be gay with the whole story. I have hocd and don’t want to be gay

Wouldn’t you know your gay from a young age, and no I’m not homophobic, I have hocd

Can I ask if your gay , cause why else would you say that?

@GummyDrop I might be gay ?‍♂️ I don’t know. To be honest I really don’t know anymore and I’m okey with it and try to live my life according to my values with my wife and daughter . Sexuality isn’t a fixed thing, sorry if I’m triggering you, but is the truth of about sexual orientation. This is tough shit but I rather be possibly be gay than live my life according to ocd rules. Again there is nothing wrong absolutely nothing wrong being LGBT. and I get it is tough and cruel and to a point meaningless suffering that we go through, and being compassionate to yourself while going through this mental illness is the best we can hold on to. But I tell you something, there is nothing else is not more scared of being of being gay than your ocd. Try to find help from professional, if you can’t try to amount knowledge and experience about ocd treatment.

Yeah avoiding was what I use to do and it make it worse, appear the thought and move on

Brooklyn isn’t saying to avoid it, she is basically saying to let the thought be there and keep on doing what you’re doing, to not obsess over it basically. From experience, there’s been times where I am actually happy, I was baking a cake and suddenly a thought came up and I just didn’t want to bake the cake anymore. But I still did it, it distracted me and I was okay again. Don’t avoid the thoughts, let them be there. And I’m sure that’s what she was saying. @urzo, I don’t think you are helping to much. If you say you’ve been where we have with these issues. You should realize that what you are saying is triggering and isn’t very helpful to us. You filling us with fear and more doubt. It’s not that we fear being gay, it’s what we are doubting what we believe. That’s what ocd is.

@advice? Is he gay? Cause he’s making hocd suffer more stressful, we are not homophobic

@advice? God Im not english person and I can't translate everything I want to say xd I just try to help... sorry if someone misunderstand me because of that, but that is what I was trying to say... Thank you Advice? to put it in better words ♡♡♡

@GummyDrop I’m not sure, but we shouldn’t assume he’s gay. But yes I understand he’s making you & us a bit confused and triggered.

@Brooklyn33 You are helping! Don’t worry, we are all in this together and here to help out eachother!

@advice? ♡♡♡♡♡♡

@advice? Exactly. If hocd sufferers really could choose to be gay so that way we feel free of the way our life is getting us so anxious we actually choose to be gay or bi or whatever instead of feeling so desperate... But we can't. We can't choose what we want to be. We feel lost. Is like your brain is telling you to be another person. To do other behaviours. To not live freely. And our identity starts to feel blurry. This is so heartbreaking. Lgbt people really can understand who we feel because of that. There are even lbgt sufferers that has the same thoughts but with being straight or bi or just feel fake :(

@advice? Yeah I get it advice, and I guess I could be triggering and somewhat irreverent about this ocd issues, and I apologize for making you guys triggered. And I get that it takes time to realize that you don’t really know if is true or not. I get the cognitive dissonance we get with the uncertainty, but guess what makes us more tolerant to the uncertainty, having the uncertainty, while living a values life and being extremely compassionate and accepting of yourself. Sorry guys, I will be more cautious from now on, I know everyone is at different path to their recovery

@GummyDrop I get where you coming from, and sometimes I have to be more careful about how I come to you and other people about this issues, specially if it just hit you it could be overbearing. And I’m sorry for that, but I want to hype you up that the path to recovery requires courage and perseverance, learning new things and leaving old not helpful beliefs in the past. Hope you find the help you need

@uzro Can you please talk to me I need help too

@GummyDrop Of course we are here to support each other, have you looked for help? Like therapy? Talk to your parents? Or a school counselor?

@uzro I have a wellness center at school My health teacher Maybe my doctors office, and last year I did a survey asking if I was depressed or not, I was I was dealing with hocd but I lied and said I’m fine I’m not and still now fine, I want things to change

Thank you for answering ♡ I know your intention was good ♡

@Brooklyn33 You welcome, ??

@uzro Sorry uzro, I was off at you and asking if you were gay. I know you were trying to help but I took it the wrong way

If you don't mind me asking, how did you tell your wife about your hocd?

@hateocd123 My wife is still on the fence about it and really doesn’t want to know or be involved about it. At the beginning she was freaked out and almost dump me, but she kinda accepted and understood that it is a mental illness. We are still shaky tho.

@uzro I hope you have a happy life I’ve never dated anyone before so idk about relationship, I suggest you get help

@hateocd123 To me it was a big deal and still is, but I had to face my fears about it everyday and at every opportunity I had. And even know I try to trigger those fears about losing my family because I might be gay voluntarily, because you need to fight back, even when you feel at peace or ocd is giving you a “break” to be more exposed to it.

@uzro Please get help

@GummyDrop I’m going through therapy rn and it has been tough and it stil is, but I’m progressing.

@GummyDrop I said those things before because we have to take a radical approach to beat it, erp is tough and weird, but it works.

@uzro I can’t do anything I’m still young and in school, idk how to get insurance

@GummyDrop Is there a counselor in your school that you can talk to? Or have you related this issues to your parents?

@uzro Voluntarily gay? I'm not sure of forcing yourself into a sex act that you don't want is a good idea. It seems like a form of checking. If you want to do it, by all means go ahead. Forcing yourself to do something seems like it could be potentially mentally damaging.

@uzro My mom told me to forget about it but she doesn’t know it’s a mental illness and if i tell her it’s a mental illness she wouldn’t believe it, I don’t live with my dad. My options are -Wellness center at school -My health teacher -My doctors( but I’m don’t sure if they have some one to help me in ocd) I don’t think I’ll ever get the help I need, cause my mom isn’t that rich and we can’t afford for ocd therapist

@hateocd123 Jaja i had the same thoughts when i started to do therapy, sorry for the misunderstanding. there is no absolutely no sex actions when you do therapy, if you were ever to do that it will be a compulsion I’m not sure if I making myself understandable . Erp is weird stuff and I get the misunderstanding. But is more like getting exposed to the stuff that triggers the most anxiety and obsessions (remember ocd is a primarily a thought disorder) in a gradually manner, E for exposure and cut all the mental processes to mitigate the anxiety and uncertainty it brings response prevention. That’s was funny Jajajja a little triggering too ???. But I get you.

@GummyDrop That’s good choices you have there to start off, before anything try to ask if they know what ocd is and if they know somebody that could help. Also try to find any local ocd support group nearby you, they might also help get the help you need. The ocd international foundation website also can be a good source, try to reach to them

@uzro Omg I’ll never thought of that you’ve help me a lot thankkkkks

@uzro I'm sorry. I guess I misunderstood you.

@GummyDrop You welcome

@hateocd123 It’s cool, I get it.trust me Ive had some many thoughts about situations that don’t even make sense together. My brain is super creative on that

@uzro Yeah I thought I was the only one with a dumb brain