- Date posted
- 37w
Avoidant & Anxious Attachments/Post Break Up
My bf broke up with me, and after that I figured out what an avoidant was and that’s who he is but it was too late. He broke up with me because he couldn’t handle my emotions or anxiety, I was overwhelming him. This caused him so much pain, that was the last thing I wanted, for us to be apart and to hurt him. Our relationship became unhealthy. I wish I could’ve healed and then met him. I’m an anxious attachment and we put each other through a lot. He decided we should break up and he needed space from me. I miss him so much. I still love him so much. I want him to come back to me. If he comes back, how do I tell him that we need to have a long healing journey together? When I brought up my form of attachment at first he told me I had to fix it on my own and that it caused him too much pressure and stress, hence why he broke up with me. I don’t think he’s aware himself that he’s an avoidant. I really miss him and I wanted to work on this together, but he decided it was best to be apart while we figured out things for ourselves on our own. I want him to grow into the man he wants to become, even if I can’t be there for him during it. I’m afraid he finds someone else, because he’s the only person on my mind. Everything felt so real with him, so right, so pure. It was true love, we fell in love. I know deep down after I heal my feminine wounds, and my attachments, I’m still going to love him. Would it be selfish to reach out then? What if he’s moved on? What do I do?