Anonymous
- Date posted
- 5y
mak33mak33
- Date posted
- 5y
I think you need to see a specialist. I’ve seen a lot of your posts and I truly believe that you have been struggling with this for so long by yourself that you are now unable to cope. The reality is you aren’t transgender. You can’t wake up one day and say okay so I am going to be a boy. Yes there are some signs like being a Tom boy and those certain memories you think well maybe I could be transgender based off that. But that is a lie as well, your mind is acting on compulsions trying to figure out why you would think those things and they bring up memories to stir in the mix. I have struggled with OCD for many years but it did not start taking a toll until I went away for college. Then I look back and see all the signs when I was younger. I have gone from harm OCD, death OCD, pure OCD, HOCD, and now I started TOCD, but a very mild form of it compared to you. However, I have been struggling for so long I have also become numb. But, I also know myself deep down that I would never be what my OCD is saying. Your OCD acts on your weakest parts, for me it’s death, and uncertainty. It sounds like it’s the same for you. What you really need to do is tell yourself thoughts aren’t reality, and actually give in to your OCD accept it just be like okay so I am thinking this that’s cool and move in. Do NOT question that is what makes your compulsions act out. And please go try and see a specialist.
AnonymousAnonymous
- Date posted
- 5y
Thank you! It’s scary because I have no idea how to know something “deep down”. I do not know “deep down” that I’m not trans. I sometimes even feel like “deep down I know I’m trans” but I’ve been told that’s just the ocd. I have this compulsion, where I literally just grab my boobs to see if I have dysphoria and not and I begin to feel like 3% worse after doing that (in the nauseous way). I’m not concerned but it’s kinda weird.. also I can’t get a specialist because my parents chose to ignore my ocd. 2 years ago I had harm ocd and I told them about my struggles and they took away my phone and my computer and I got into trouble. I certainly do NOT want to tell them about this. They will ignore it. I can’t book appointments or anything because I’m still too young so idk what to do
mak33mak33
- Date posted
- 5y
@margo1 I am sorry your parents are having a hard time accepting. My parents were the same way. Just tell them you have been having a troubling time and that you think maybe seeing a specialist will help. They can’t deny you help when it’s mental health. Also, download some word games and puzzles on your phone and use those everytime you’re having a spout. Retraining your brain and using logic will help the urges not come on so strong.
AnonymousAnonymous
- Date posted
- 5y
@mak33 Is it possible to email a specialist? Because I’m not ready to tell my parents
mak33mak33
- Date posted
- 5y
@margo1 Yes, everything is going to cost money. I would look into maybe an online help forums. Also you can order CBT books off amazon for like $15 and they help. I would also look into BetterHelp it’s an online treatment center where they connect you with a specialist based off your needs it’s $100 a month but you can talk to them whenever you would like, voice call, video chat, anything. Also maybe look into some natural remedies like CBD oil to help calm your anxiety. You’ll get through this stay strong!
Doug mDoug m
- Date posted
- 5y
Medication helped my hocd
anxiousgirlhelpanxiousgirlhelp
- Date posted
- 13w
@Doug m Do u still have the thoughts
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- Date posted
- 17w
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- Date posted
- 15w
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Anonymous
- Date posted
- 13w
Any Advice?
Hey everyone, just wanted to post an honest update on where I’m at in my HOCD recovery. Right now, I'm stuck in what feels like a 24/7 spike — nonstop thoughts, intrusive sensations, identity doubts, and hyperfocus. The worst part? It feels real. Like I’ve “lost,” like I’ve accepted it, like I am gay. The thoughts don't feel like anxiety anymore — they feel like truth. I’ve been trying to do ERP, but the spike has been so constant I don’t even have to “do exposures” — the thoughts, feelings, and sensations are just there all day long. It’s like living inside an exposure. And it’s exhausting. BUT — here’s what I’ve been doing (and what I’m sticking to now): I say once: “These thoughts and feelings are welcome to stay for as long as they want.” I let the doubt, the feelings, the hyperfocus exist. I don’t check, test, or analyze — even when it screams at me. I live my life anyway — folding clothes, watching TV, eating, walking — with the storm in my head. Even when it feels 100% real. Even when I’m fully focused on it. I’ve stopped trying to feel better. I’m letting it all burn — and just not fixing it. It doesn’t feel good. It doesn’t feel right. It doesn’t feel like progress.
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