When did you realize you have OCD?

Last year during April I started to experience groinal responses when I looked at kids. I was terrified of what it could mean and decided to attempt two weeks later. The very next day I had those responses I decided to attempt. I didn’t really have the courage to do so at that time but I started experiencing images about disturbing things done to kids and as days went by it got worse. April 16 was the last straw and I couldn’t take it anymore. I ended up in a mental hospital but before I ended up there I had searched up what I was experiencing. That’s when I started to understand that it was OCD. I felt relieved for a few moments until I felt the urge to get more information. I saw lots and lots of things and many comments saying that it wasn’t normal and that people who went through this were disgusting people who shouldn’t be allowed to roam free. That’s when my anxiety and fear became worse and I tried to get rid of it but nothing worked. I shook the entire time I was awake, I didn’t have motivation for anything anymore, I just felt so disgusting. In the end, I’m so glad I ended up in that mental hospital or else I wouldn’t be here with my friends and family. Thank you for reading my story, I’m so glad that I’m not alone

POCD

User type: Therapist

Date posted: 18d ago

That is so hard, when your brain tries to torture you by turning something you care about into a nightmare. pOCD is awful but YOU are not awful. Also- sometimes a physical sensation is just a physical sensation, but OCD will lie. Thank you for sharing your thoughts

User type: Therapist

Date posted: 18d ago

Hello, Thank you for sharing your story. I'm glad to hear that you were able to get help and started your ERP journey. Obsessions can latch to anything that we value, including children. By sharing your story it may also help those who were in your situation feel validated.

User type: Therapist

Date posted: 16d ago

For those who don't understand OCD, it can make those of use who do have it, feel so defeating. That's why we are trying to debunk and spread awareness that it targets what you value and is 'ego-dystonic' or makes you think, do, or feel things that you don't want to think, feel, or do. Your journey led you to us, and I'm glad that you found us. You're safe at NOCD because we know that if you have OCD, then you are not your thoughts. And we can target it with the best evidenced-based treatment called ERP. I'm glad that you're alive today and found us.

Uhhhh15

Date posted: 16d ago

I know exactly how you feel my story is almost the same as yours, mine started in September, when I had that random intrusive urge, October started the gronial responses, I was terrified and tried attempting 4 times, none of them worked, I grew hopeless, my OCD was so bad it was ripping me apart from head to toe I didn’t feel real or myself I didn’t know who this person was anymore but I did know I didn’t wanna be that terrible person, I still struggle to this day. I’ve never been to a hospital even tho I wanted to admit myself multiple times, just know you are not alone there are many people like you struggling and feeling hopeless, good luck on your journey.. <3

HOY

Date posted: 18d ago

I found out I have intrusive OCD in february, I have to get diagnosis by therapist but its really awful so far

Insephy

Date posted: 17d ago

@HOY I’m so sorry to hear that, OCD truly is a horrible thing to deal with. I hope you get the help that you need to surpass this chapter in your life and be able to fulfill your goals and dreams

Andrea Wells

Date posted: 17d ago

You are definitely not alone! I ended up hospitalized for OCD at one point too. It's so horrifying and debilitating. I'm glad you got access to care. I am 34 now, I didn't realize I had OCD until age 31 when a therapist brought it to my attention. But I look back and realize I had symptoms my whole life. Severe at times too, but I was always told it was general anxiety. What has your treatment and recovery journey been like since leaving the hospital? I'm glad you are still here with us <3.

Rookeryend123

Date posted: 22w ago

Hi, I’m Matt!

Hey guys, I hope you’re well! My names Matt, and OCD has struck me again 😂 When I was 10 years old I had to attend therapy as I was having excessive intrusive thoughts. P.s. I didn’t even know this was possible at the age of 10! I then completely forgot about it, until 2.5 years ago when I started experiencing ROCD. I really couldn’t understand why I was feeling/thinking this way however, I soon after remembered my struggles as a child and then realised my OCD had returned. Also, my mum has serious OCD so I guess that could be why too. I had a a really hard battle with my emotions and mood due to this however, the last 1.5 years had been really good and I managed it well. I got married and had the best day of my life. 3 months ago, a thought about having an affair in my head appeared, and BOOM, it’s back again. I’m struggling a lot right now however, I’ve accepted that this could be a re occurring theme throughout my life, and it’s time to learn to deal with it again. I’m back on medication and have started ERP therapy, so hopefully it’s on the up from here. I’m not here to list off my triggers and thoughts as this would be me seeking reassurance however, I’m here to show that recovery is certainly possible!

Dennasw

Date posted: 11w ago

My first day

Hi I kept seeing this app on repeat on TikTok over and over and I thought I give it a shot. I have never been diagnosed with OCD but I know that I have it. I’m a young adult and I found out the first time I had OCD was watching lelelons truth video? I was 14 at the time She had to resist sitting back down in a chair after her having sat down she started having a mental break down when she was told to resist. That’s when I knew. It started with myself going up and down a staircase twice buckling unbuckling my seat belt everytime I’m in the car ect I have always been super anti social but trying my best I can socialize but my mind wants to make it sexual with family and friends ughhhh I hate it because that’s not me when I graduated thoughts of hurting my loved ones corrupted my mind I broke down outside of church one time asking if this was really me or not i question if I’m a good enough friend or person in this world to begin with thinking everyone is judging me so so close how can I make this situation better did I do something wrong I struggle with depression as well not to bad but it’s there I come from a loving family but broken as well i believe in god and my OCD makes me go often he’s not real that stuff isn’t real no one is there to save you the list goes on. Anyway I struggle a lot and I really hope that this will help me because I feel extremely hopeless. Lucky for me I do have the ability to seek therapy and I am excited. The only person I ever tell my thoughts to is God no other human has heard so I’m really really hoping this helps me out if your reading this thank you it means a lot because this is my first time ever admitting all this it’s a lot to take in I know and I hope you are ok and that you have a great night and know that we got this

Wessers19

Date posted: 9w ago

Could being exposed to content as a kid affected me in this way?

Trying not to seek reassurance, but rather connect the dots on my OCD and possible reasons as to why I am the way I am. I have severe OCD (or at least I hope I do) mainly surrounding POCD. I've had symptoms of OCD the majority of my life but this theme has come up more recently. When I was a kid, and i'm talking 6-7, I was first exposed to some really gross adult content online. It was introduced to me by a friend of mine around the same age of me. I saw some really disgusting things that a 6-7 year old should definitely not see. This was not a one time occurrence, as I had been exposed to taboo topics online years to come after that, such as the same friend introducing me to Omegle... And i'm sure you can imagine how that went, theres a lot of genuinely disgusting human beings on there. Coming back to the reason for making this post; is it possible to early exposure to this content could be one of the reasons I struggle with POCD? It genuinely scares me to death because you hear that real p*dos dealt with simular situations when they were kids, so thats kind of making me feel that this could be more than OCD, and I could be a genuinely bad person. My POCD feels so real, that at times i'm fully convinced its not OCD. Sometimes I can't even distinguish the feelings of attraction between a younger person and an older person, except for the feeling of anxiety and fear. Its really hard to explain without going into detail, but it just feels so real. Some feedback on this would be great, thank you all.

Be a part of the largest OCD Community

Share your thoughts so the Community can respond

When did you realize you have OCD?

Related posts

Be a part of the largest OCD Community

Be a part of the largest OCD Community